Shinobi

Happy Family day everyone!

Now this is where the fun begins

Five free themes for God Eater 3 are available. Don't know if it's just available to the NA store.

Allow me to show you all what should have been a part of the halftime show for the Super Bowl

Real talk people;

Have any of you felt like something was missing from your life? Like there is potential being wasted somewhere but you don't know where and what exactly it is? 

I've been doing some personal reflecting ever since the new year started. For the past couple of years I have looked back at the end of every year and always find myself disappointed in myself, not in my gaming life (still slaying away at those platinums 👌) but in my personal life. For the past couple of years I've made barely any strides in my life. When I was younger, I didn't think much of it. I basically had the mentality that as long as video games were a big part of my life, I would always be happy and that things would change when I got older. But I've grown to realize that isn't the case. That's not to say I'm depressed or anything like that. I just currently feel like i'm strolling through life without any big purpose. I mean, i'm currently going to college for something I enjoy and find very meaningful but the whole journey so far has just been mundane.

It's hard attending classes where everyone seems to know more than you do. It's hard to relate to anyone when everyone is double your age and has a better understanding of who they are and who they want to be. However, the hardest part is not being able to shake the feeling like I'm doing all of this alone. No friends, no significant other. I am lucky to be in the position where I still have family but I still find it all difficult nonetheless. It's been this way for almost two years now. Ever since graduating from high school I haven't made a single friend, haven't hanged out with anybody, haven't gone out and experienced anything. I work, attend classes, stay home, and that's it.

That's not to say this isn't my fault at all. I'm not the easiest person to make friends with. I'm quiet, fairly shy, and while it may seem I "push people away" it's usually because I don't want to seem too clingy and desperate for attention. I want to give off the idea that i'm more happy in my life than I really am. Other times it's simply because I don't care to be friends with that person. It's always been extremely hard for me to make friends so making friends in college seems like a insurmountable task. I've very slowly gotten better at being more open and less shy but it's been something I've been working at what seems forever and have made little progress. At the rate I'm currently going, it doesn't seem I will reach where I want to be anytime soon.

I've been an introvert all my life but I'm at the point where I'm getting sick and tired of it and want out, but at the same time my shyness is preventing me from leaving my comfort zone and doing something ambitious for once in my life. It's a battle I have everyday with myself and while I don't plan on giving up anytime soon, I'm starting to question if I ever will win. I'll probably see it through to see where I end up regardless but it's a thought that sometimes lingers.

Sorry to bombard you guys with all this; I felt like this is something I had to get off my chest at some point. I'm really trying to make 2019 the first year in awhile where I can look back at it and be proud instead of disappointed. Happy gaming everyone! 

15,000 trophies achieved!

#256 - Battlefield V

Nothing much to say. It's not a horrible game by any means but it's nothing that I thought was flat out amazing (besides the graphics). 

That awkward moment when you accidentally kick someone from the Facebook group chat you're a part of for work. I feel like such an asshole.

As soon as I did it I went "Whoops! But why is that even an option for me!?"

It's nice to see an old friend of mine make such amazing strides in her life. It's awesome to see good things happen to good people.