DrBloodmoney

DrBloodmoney's Super Scientific Ranking of Games!

963 posts in this topic

4 minutes ago, YaManSmevz said:

Sometimes I feel like if I'm lucky, I'll finally conquer this backlog while playing ports on the PS12, and then immediately after my moment of triumph do an unintentional impression of Godfather III's ending.


Dude, tell me about it 😄

 

Ever since starting to peruse these checklist threads, my Complete vs. Backlog feels like counting up my little hill of sand grains, while sitting on a beach 😂

 

For every game I finish, I add like 15 more to the wishlist!

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3 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

Choppy Choppy

 

Awesome reads as ever man .........

 

.........Even if Tales of Arise did get beaten by Final Fantasy XIII - now I'm remembering why I didn't enjoy science at school 😆

 

I did skim over a few of the story-ish bits of that review I must admit, I started to read them and was like "MUST SHUT EYES LALALALALALALA NOT LISTENING" but I will go back and read Arise  fully once I actually have played it myself.

 

Someone needs to convince you to play a better Tales of' game, like Tales of Xillia or something...... I wonder who could do that........ Someone I'm sure 😉

 

I'm with Smevz on this one.....

 

That.....

 

Quote

And God of 2018 gets yet another violent shove towards the top of my backlog....

 

......Sometimes I feel like if I'm lucky, I'll finally conquer this backlog while playing ports on the PS12, and then immediately after my moment of triumph do an unintentional impression of Godfather III's ending.

 

I'm glad I have actually purchased it now - but man, you need to stop making me fling games up to the top of my backlog too! Not that I'm really complaining about that of course.

 

3 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

Ever since starting to peruse these checklist threads, my Complete vs. Backlog feels like counting up my little hill of sand grains, while sitting on a beach 😂

 

For every game I finish, I add like 15 more to the wishlist!

 

Yep....... I'm guilty of doing that too, I've added to mine far more than I ever have made a decent amount of progress in clearing it since coming out of the woodwork (there I am comparing myself to woodworm again, must stop that)...... 

 

.......I'll just be content sat next to you in the sand counting my smaller hill of sand grains 😂

 

On Sly 3

 

 

I enjoyed reading your thoughts on Sly 3 as well - I mean I enjoyed all of the reviews, I'm just singling out this bit specifically.

 

I don't know that it is the various voice actresses fault for Carmelita - if anything it's whoever was in charge of the voice direction - because, whilst she's more accented in Sly 3 she also has a wildly inconsistent accent too. In one game she sounds fairly normal, then in another she sounds like she's slightly hispanic, in one of the games she sounds almost italian, they just never really made the effort to make her sound consistent.

 

The only reason I think it isn't on the actress, is that in every Broken Sword game, a different actress has played NIco, yet also managed to do such a good job of sounding almost identical, that unless you knew, yo wouldn't notice it.

She's accented too in that she's French, so they managed to nail that, whereas Sucker Punch never seemed to bother even trying. It's a weird one really.

 

About Deer God

 

I feel like you might make me add to my backlog again with Deer God - for as flawed as that might be, I like the sound of it, it sounds like the video game equivalent of an underrated little Disney film in Brother Bear.... I think the idea of a hunter being shown how harmful his actions can be in a first hand way sounds really interesting, so I might have to pick that up if I see it on sale.

 

As always, I'm looking forward to the next one.

 

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12 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

 

Awesome reads as ever man .........

 

.........Even if Tales of Arise did get beaten by Final Fantasy XIII - now I'm remembering why I didn't enjoy science at school 😆

 

I did skim over a few of the story-ish bits of that review I must admit, I started to read them and was like "MUST SHUT EYES LALALALALALALA NOT LISTENING" but I will go back and read Arise  fully once I actually have played it myself.

 

Someone needs to convince you to play a better Tales of' game, like Tales of Xillia or something...... I wonder who could do that........ Someone I'm sure 😉

 

Ha - remember - I still really liked FFXIII - I acknowledge the issues it had, but think they were massively (and unfairly) overblown by the community at large. The game still had a lot of things going for it!

 

You know, that Tales of Arise review is one of those odd ones that comes along every now and then, where I feel, reading it over, that I might have missed the balancing act a little. A lot of what the review outlines are slightly negative things, while my overall impression was actually pretty positive - sometimes that happen in a game that I generally like - the things that I think hold it back from being truly great tend to stand out a bit more to me, precisely because the game was generally good, and so the things I highlight in the review tend to focus on those aspects, and the whole thing reads like a list of negatives, whereas in reality, the experience was mostly positive!

 

D'oh.

 

I did try to highlight to great aspects, it just seems to have taken more words to define the negative ones!

 

 

Quote

I'm with Smevz on this one.....

 

That.....

 

 

I'm glad I have actually purchased it now - but man, you need to stop making me fling games up to the top of my backlog too! Not that I'm really complaining about that of course.

 

 

Yep....... I'm guilty of doing that too, I've added to mine far more than I ever have made a decent amount of progress in clearing it since coming out of the woodwork (there I am comparing myself to woodworm again, must stop that)...... 

 

.......I'll just be content sat next to you in the sand counting my smaller hill of sand grains 😂

 

You know - I just had a total wake up call for this exact issue - since I've been exclusively on PS3 for a couple of weeks with the old R&C games, I hadn't turned on my PS5 for a while.

Well, this morning I decided to buy some DLC for a PS3 game I've had sitting on my "to play" list for... you know... like a decade 😳 - (part of the perils of turning on that old system to play one specific game - you see that list of unplayed games, and fall down the rabbit-hole 😂)

 

Anyways, in order to buy them, I had to go through the needlessly complicated route of going onto the PS5 to add funds to my wallet, in order to buy the stuff on PS3 (Thanks Sony 😒)...

 

…..and when I switched it on, Was like "Who's PS5 is this?!"

 I have bought so many games via the app in the 2 weeks which have auto-downloaded, that not one game visible on the PS5 home screen is one I had on there last time I looked 😂

 

I'm pretty sure the entire videogame industry could take a 10 year break, and I still wouldn't be able to catch up on my own list 😂

 

 

Quote

On Sly 3

 

 

I enjoyed reading your thoughts on Sly 3 as well - I mean I enjoyed all of the reviews, I'm just singling out this bit specifically.

 

I don't know that it is the various voice actresses fault for Carmelita - if anything it's whoever was in charge of the voice direction - because, whilst she's more accented in Sly 3 she also has a wildly inconsistent accent too. In one game she sounds fairly normal, then in another she sounds like she's slightly hispanic, in one of the games she sounds almost italian, they just never really made the effort to make her sound consistent.

 

The only reason I think it isn't on the actress, is that in every Broken Sword game, a different actress has played NIco, yet also managed to do such a good job of sounding almost identical, that unless you knew, yo wouldn't notice it.

She's accented too in that she's French, so they managed to nail that, whereas Sucker Punch never seemed to bother even trying. It's a weird one really.

 

That's interesting about Broken Sword - yeah, I guess blaming the Voice Actors themselves is silly - after all, sounding like others is their bread and butter.

like you say, it's more an issue of direction.

I mean, that accent thing can happen even with the SAME actor - don't know if you watched those Narnia movies, but Ben Barnes' Caspian character literally drops his spanish accent from one movie to the next, and I doubt that was his own choice! 

 

 

Quote

About Deer God

 

I feel like you might make me add to my backlog again with Deer God - for as flawed as that might be, I like the sound of it, it sounds like the video game equivalent of an underrated little Disney film in Brother Bear.... I think the idea of a hunter being shown how harmful his actions can be in a first hand way sounds really interesting, so I might have to pick that up if I see it on sale.

 

You know - I think knowing what Deer God is - and specifically, what it isn't - is the most important factor in enjoying it. If you know what you are on for, and that is what you want, I think it's a great little game - not long, but satisfying in terms of art and feel - much like Proteus. If only the reviews at the time had actually done their jobs and... you know... tell people that... 😂

 

 

Edited by DrBloodmoney
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7 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

newtestsubjects.jpg

 

269b.png!!SCIENCE UPDATE!!269b.png

 

 

The next 5 (somewhat) randomly selected games to be submitted for scientific analysis shall be:

 

 

Bentley's Hackpack
LA Cops
Ratchet & Clank: A Crack in Time
Ratchet & Clank: Nexus
Uncanny

 

Ooh!

 

I'm wrappin up on Hotline Miami, and LA Cops is regularly on sale and compared (though not always favorably), so now I can have definitive scientific evidence as to whether I should bother or not.

 

Yeah Dr. Bloodmoney! YEAH SCIENCE!!

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13 minutes ago, DrBloodmoney said:

 

OH MY GOD. 1f631.png

 

26a0.png26a0.png!!SCIENCE EMERGENCY!!26a0.png26a0.png

 

2622.png2622.pngBREAK THE GLASS!2622.png2622.png

1f6b8.png1f6b8.pngHIDE THE CHILDREN!1f6b8.png1f6b8.png

1f525.png1f525.pngBURN THE DOG!1f525.png1f525.png

 

 

 

@YaManSmevz -  Listen, I don't like to prejudge the science, or give too much away about my feeling on any game ahead of subjecting them to the full rigours of Scientific Discourse and Analysis...

 

...but this is an emergency situation - as you have mentioned the possibility of purchase.

 

As such, I am going to do something I have never done, even once - I am going to post the first line of my (already half written) LA Cops review, as I cannot, in good conscience, allow the possibility of any ambiguity:

 

Here goes:

 

"If I were trapped on a desert island, with only a functional Playstation and a copy of LA Cops to pass the time, I genuinely believe I would EAT this game before re-playing it."

 

 

More to follow in the full review...

 

😂😂😂you're a real one, my dude👊

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21 minutes ago, DrBloodmoney said:

 

1f525.png1f525.pngBURN THE DOG!1f525.png1f525.png

 

"If I were trapped on a desert island, with only a functional Playstation and a copy of LA Cops to pass the time, I genuinely believe I would EAT this game before re-playing it."

 

 

I smell a roast cookin, and I'm not sure if it's because your dog is well-seasoned or whether we may have A NEW

 

1f6a8.png least awesome game 1f6a8.png

 

that is about to get suplexed onto the barbie.

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23 hours ago, Slava said:

58f6a01695be445d0e40b92f33a0c8b5.jpg

 

POV: you're @rjkclarke when @DrBloodmoney writes an emergency post.

 

23 hours ago, GonzoWARgasm said:

 

I smell a roast cookin, and I'm not sure if it's because your dog is well-seasoned or whether we may have A NEW

 

1f6a8.png least awesome game 1f6a8.png

 

that is about to get suplexed onto the barbie.

 

These two really cracked me up - and deserve all the rep points, unfortunately I'm all out, so I'll have to give them out tomorrow, whilst I'm putting my dog out  *cough* eating my lunch.... 😆

Edited by rjkclarke
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Thanks @DrBloodmoney for this new batch. You frankly are quite a talented critic - your comments on LA Cops really made my day :-)

 

Edited by Neef-GT5
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1 minute ago, Neef-GT5 said:

Thanks for this - you’re frankly quite a talented criticist. Your comments on LA Cops really made my day :-)

 

Thank you, sir!

 

I'm glad someone could get something out of my time with LA Cops - because it sure wasn't any enjoyment on my part! 😂

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Okay, so recently I got all the trophies for Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons, and I feel like I remembered a point in time where a lot of people online talked about how emotional/good the game was. As such, I would like you to do an analysis on it to see how warranted those reactions were in your eyes.

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3 minutes ago, grayhammmer said:

Okay, so recently I got all the trophies for Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons, and I feel like I remembered a point in time where a lot of people online talked about how emotional/good the game was. As such, I would like you to do an analysis on it to see how warranted those reactions were in your eyes.


Way ahead of you buddy! 😉
 

I did Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons in Batch 12 - Right Here!

 

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Just now, grayhammmer said:

Oops.


I take that error as the highest compliment, my friend ☺️ 

- it means I’ve managed to do enough reviews on here that it’s becoming easy to miss one when looking at the list 😉

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Very well, how about you analyze Gris instead given that game also tries to be an emotional little indie game.

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6 minutes ago, grayhammmer said:

Very well, how about you analyze Gris instead given that game also tries to be an emotional little indie game.


Good shout, my man - it will be nice to write about a game with real emotional weight to it, and not just one faking it like Lost at Sea!

 

I’ll flag it with your name 👍

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I'm constantly blown away at your ability to not only remember but meaningfully critique these games you played so long ago; I played LA Cops around the same time you did, and if you asked me about it I'd only be able to describe a vague feeling of dread.

 

I'd love to see you finish Supergiant's efforts with Bastion and Pyre! You ranked Transistor quite a bit above Hades, which from my experience is equal parts spicy and correct, and I'm curious where their other two games will land.

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Absolute top quality stuff as ever man!

 

I think you actually saved my backlog for once - instead of actually adding to it.......

 

.........Which I guess I can't complain about (not that I would,)  I am oddly going to bump Bentley's Hack-Pack up the list though, because now you've reminded me it exists, I really ought to finish my Sly Collection off properly I suppose.

 

On Ratchet

 

I'm so glad you had a great to decent time with both of these.....

 

....... Especially as I sort of nudged you in the direction of going back to them with a very sharp pointed stick! 😆. I did worry that you might not have much fun with them and you'd turn up on my doorstep to give me a nice Glasgow-Kiss (insert area of Scotland you are actually from,) on the forehead, as penance for my suggestions 😂.

 

I initially really loved those Clank puzzles myself in Crack in Time - I had a bit more of a frustrating time with them on repeat playthroughs though, I kind of just wanted to get through them on those repeat plays. So I think my lasting impression of them unfortunately got a bit tainted by that.

 

Nexus is a funny one - I definitely don't dislike it, just like you didn't in fact I do like it obviously - I'm pretty much in the same boat with you that it just feels a lot smaller scale than it probably should. There's just something about it that feels a little less important and smaller scale. I'm not saying longer equals better. I tend to think of it like this. That if Return of the Jedi ended when they leave Jabba's palace, that's kind of what Into the Nexus reminds me of, you just expect more.

 

The fact R&C had saved the universe so many times before, kind of makes a lot of what happens on a smaller scale in that game feel a bit - well, I don't think throwaway is the right word but less important to some degree.

 

On Uncanny Valley

 

I'm still interested in it after that awesome write-up, but I do know not to really go into it with particularly high expectations based on that.

 

Now I'll just be gently ushering it further back down the list with a friendly "OKAY OKAY, BACK OF THE LINE SONNY!"

 

On Quantum Conundrum

 

You might have just added to my backlog with this one though - you know I'm also a bit of a puzzle enthusiast myself, so this one sounds right up my street, so I might have to go and hop onto the PS3 store and pick that one up. Well provided the PS3 is stable enough for five minutes and it doesn't rip a hole in the space-time continuum when I try to access it like it usually seems to try to do 😆...

 

Also .....

 

 

11 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

visiting the mansion of his eccentric uncle Fitz Quadwrangle.

 

Why did you have to mention this? Now I'm saddened and disappointed that I don't have an Uncle named that....  I'm stuck with generic Uncle names like Don or John...... Oh well guess it's off to change my name tomorrow to Rabastan Pinwheelodon IV ..... Y'know just so my nieces and nephews can have an Uncle with an enjoyable name! 

 

Oh and I'm also pretty surprised that L.A Cops managed to unseat Space Overlords from the Throne of Shame.

 

On Lost at Sea

 

Oh man - you know you initially got me very excited - the same way you yourself got excited with these exact words.

 

11 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

The game it speaks to certainly sounds like a "DrBloodmoney darling". 
It hits a lot of the big points most likely to get a thumbs up from me:
Indie game? Check.
Walking Sim? Check.
Metaphors? Check.
Tragedy? Check.
Puzzles? Check Check Check!

 

I read those - and was like "Yep that totally sounds like an rjkclarke kind of game too....."

 

...... Then I read on.

 

Sheesh - almost nothing about that sounds appealing. Why put those tendrils in the game - that is one of the most egregious things I can think of, putting "enemies" or progress blockers, into a Walking Sim, that just seems like such a stupid oversight.

 

That game sounded like it needed a healthy dose of Jessica Curry goodness to add some atmosphere - well, that and some competent writing that's for sure.

 

11 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

I am, generally, a sucker for character connection. (I'm the guy who still cries at Life is Strange after umpteen playthroughs, got laughed at by my wife for weeping at Gone Home, and who even got welled up at Child of Light for Christ's sake!) I am an easy mark for emotional games!
With Lost at Sea, not only did I not feel like I particularly connected with the main character, I didn't feel like the creators of the game did either. 
She did not feel like a realistic depiction of a woman ruminating on a life lived, but rather, an approximation of what a woman ruminating on a life is supposed to be. 
Lost at Sea doesn't feel like an emotionally driven game, it feels like an approximation of an emotional game, by someone who did not understand women, loss, life, emotions, or games.

 

I'm fairly sure I'd have almost exactly the same reaction you would to this game, based off of this - I'd be looking to have all of those similar reactions from the game, and instead getting frustrated.

 

11 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

Lost at Sea feels like the most wretched and insipid kind of emotional exploitation - the kind not designed to sell a point of view, but simply to sell a product. It feels like a hastily thrown together game, the likes of which would usually be relegated to the "only played for trophies bargain-buffet of PSN", however, the dev - seeing players like myself as an easy mark - decided to approximate the games I like to make some easy money...
...and I fell for it.

 

I think you've pretty much just done a wonderful service to anyone that might also have been suckered into buying this eventually. These are the type of games that end up disappointing me the most, when you just feel exploited coming out the other side of it.

 

11 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

If you take a shit in burger bun, you will get what looks like a burger. With the right marketing, you might even fool someone into buying that burger. But they sure as hell won't enjoy eating that burger.

 

If you can manage to do that you should probably enter Britain s Got Talent. Although if a DrBloodmoney franchise restaurant appeared I'm not sure I'd be sampling the  Shitburgers, or the human thumb sandwiches we talked about over in Smevz thread :lol:...

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by rjkclarke
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6 minutes ago, Xylobe said:

I'd love to see you finish Supergiant's efforts with Bastion and Pyre! You ranked Transistor quite a bit above Hades, which from my experience is equal parts spicy and correct, and I'm curious where their other two games will land.

 

Haha thank you bud - I like that - "equal parts spicy and correct" is what I think I want written on my tombstone! 😂

 

Good shout on the remainder of Supergiant's catalogue - I will flag both with your name, for priority ranking 👍

 

As a quick note, I should say - I haven't declared the next batch yet, but I do have a notion cooking for the next ones that might necessitate taking up several slots at once, so both your (and @grayhammmer's) picks might take a couple of rounds to get to...

... but don't worry, the master list (🙌all hail Master List 🙌) has those ones locked in now, so I'll get there soon!

 

 

11 minutes ago, rjkclarke said:

Absolute top quality stuff as ever man!

 

I think you actually saved my backlog for once - instead of actually adding to it.......

 

Hey - if I can steer anyone away from the double-turdlet special of LA Cops and Lost at Sea, I'll consider the sorry time I had with those games almost worth it!

 

11 minutes ago, rjkclarke said:

 

On Ratchet

 

I'm so glad you had a great to decent time with both of these.....

 

....... Especially as I sort of nudged you in the direction of going back to them with a very sharp pointed stick! 1f606.png. I did worry that you might not have much fun with them and you'd turn up on my doorstep to give me a nice Glasgow-Kiss (insert area of Scotland you are actually from,) on the forehead, as penance for my suggestions 1f602.png.

 

Hey - don't shy away from the credit - as far as I'm concerned, I would likely have sontinued to wallow in ignorance were it not for your prodding with these ones, so kudos! You can be sure I'd be laying the blame at your doorstep if I had hated them, so it has to work both ways 😂

 

I have just fired up Afterparty at @YaManSmevz's express recommendation, and thd same rules shall apply - if great, he gets all the credit, if terrible, he assumes all the blame! 😂

 

11 minutes ago, rjkclarke said:

I initially really loved those Clank puzzles myself in Crack in Time - I had a bit more of a frustrating time with them on repeat playthroughs though, I kind of just wanted to get through them on those repeat plays. So I think my lasting impression of them unfortunately got a bit tainted by that.

 

It's a fair point, and I think if Crack in Time had required more than the 2 playthroughs, I think it would have been a much bigger issue for me, as repetition without additional challenge is a problem inherent to puzzle games generally, but I think they took me so by surprise, that the initial good feeling was so good, that it carried my adulation across the second run pretty much unscathed! 

 

 

11 minutes ago, rjkclarke said:

Nexus is a funny one - I definitely don't dislike it, just like you didn't in fact I do like it obviously - I'm pretty much in the same boat with you that it just feels a lot smaller scale than it probably should. There's just something about it that feels a little less important and smaller scale. I'm not saying longer equals better. I tend to think of it like this. That if Return of the Jedi ended when they leave Jabba's palace, that's kind of what Into the Nexus reminds me of, you just expect more.

 

The fact R&C had saved the universe so many times before, kind of makes a lot of what happens on a smaller scale in that game feel a bit - well, I don't think throwaway is the right word but less important to some degree.

 

Yeah...

.... I do wonder if, 6 months from now, I will look back and think that I gave Nexus a bum rap, given how close to Crack in Time I played it.

 I really didn't give it room to breath on it's own, and was constantly comparing it to what felt like a much better game. I guess I'll see, but it really did suffer for its proximity to greatness in my eyes!

 

11 minutes ago, rjkclarke said:

On Uncanny Valley

 

I'm still interested in it after that awesome write-up, but I do know not to really go into it with particularly high expectations based on that.

 

Hmmm - one thing I will say, is, Yes, by all means check out Uncanny Valley... but if you are in the mood for that genre, and haven't played Lone Survivor - THAT is the one to go for initially. I think that's the best example of the genre.... and I think you, specifically, would like it -  (I haven't reviewed yet, but when I do, there will be a lot of David Lynch movies referenced. Like, A LOT of them!)

 

11 minutes ago, rjkclarke said:

On Quantum Conundrum

 

You might have just added to my backlog with this one though - you know I'm also a bit of a puzzle enthusiast myself, so this one sounds right up my street, so I might have to go and hop onto the PS3 store and pick that one up. Well provided the PS3 is stable enough for five minutes and it doesn't rip a hole in the space-time continuum when I try to access it like it usually seems to try to do 1f606.png...

 

Oh God, not half. I already had the game, but getting those DLCs was a Kafka-esque nightmare. How do you have a store with no payment option, and no visible "Buy" buttons?!?!?

 

11 minutes ago, rjkclarke said:

 

Why did you have to mention this? Now I'm saddened and disappointed that I don't have an Uncle named that....  I'm stuck with generic Uncle names like Don or John...... Oh well guess it's off to change my name tomorrow to Rabastan Pinwheelodon IV ..... Y'know just so my nieces and nephews can have an Uncle with an enjoyable name! 

 

Haha, dude, I'd take an Uncle called anything, if his voice was John De Lancie's! 

 

 

11 minutes ago, rjkclarke said:

On Lost at Sea

 

Oh man - you know you initially got me very excited - the same way you yourself got excited with these exact words.

 

 

I read those - and was like "Yep that totally sounds like an rjkclarke kind of game too....."

 

...... Then I read on.

 

Sheesh - almost nothing about that sounds appealing. Why put those tendrils in the game - that is one of the most egregious things I can think of, putting "enemies" or progress blockers, into a Walking Sim, that just seems like such a stupid oversight.

 

That game sounded like it needed a healthy dose of Jessica Curry goodness to add some atmosphere - well, that and some competent that's for sure.

 

I'm fairly sure I'd have almost exactly the same reaction you would to this game, based off of this - I'd be looking to have all of those similar reactions from the game, and instead getting frustrated.

 

I think you've pretty much just done a wonderful service to anyone that might also have been suckered into buying this eventually. These are the type of games that end up disappointing me the most, when you just feel exploited coming out the other side of it.

 

Yeah - there are lots of bad games out there, and mostly, they just make me sigh - but it's only when I feel like they are deliberately preying on people do I get actively annoyed - and when I think they are deliberately faking the 'emotional' side of gaming - the one genre that still struggles for acceptance and for credibility, even in 2021, I get really livid. If I thought it was made from the heart, and was just a bad game, that would be one thing, but the fact that it feels like a bad game which then tried to excuse itself by feigning emotional overtones...

... that really boiled my piss!

 

Definitely avoid that one. LA Cops sucks completely - worse than Lost at Sea...

 

...but Lost at Sea still got me angrier! 😂

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