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Ever been cheated on?


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every time I've ever tried the relationship thing ? unfortunately I don't believe in just a fun time so kinda has me mistrusting as can be on the subject as much as I'd love to get back into a relationship, Too old fashion when it comes's to relationships I think. 

 

update: In a happy relationship, didn't see it coming but here I am ? hopefully I won't be updating this again.

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  • 2 weeks later...
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  • 3 years later...
On 01/08/2017 at 0:14 AM, MercilessWaffle said:
Spoiler

 

Never been cheated on, but I was in a pretty bad spot about 2-3 years ago after who I deemed my best friend up and dumped me. To try and make a long story short (who am I kidding, this is gonna be a long story), I thought I had developed feelings for him, though in hindsight, not sure if I ever really did. I think I just clung to him as some kind of emotional support, since I was going through some bad depression at the time. I told him how I felt, and he played it off and basically told me he didn't feel the same way. I was expecting as much, but I still got pretty hurt, and asked if I could have some space for a while, and he EXPLODED. At the time, we were playing Evolve almost every evening on the Xbone, and he literally told me that I was "forcing him to play a multiplayer game alone" when I told him I didn't want to interact with him for a bit while I got my emotions in order.

 

I've never seen him throw such a fit or act so childish, but I ended up blaming myself, and immediately regretted ever telling him anything. Soon after, he ironically asked me to leave him alone for a bit, so I did. After nearly a month, I got a bit anxious, basically asked if we were still friends, blah, blah, blah; he told me he doesn't think of me the same way any more, and wish things could go back to normal, but that they never will. I get hurt all the more, continue to leave him alone, before my emotions get the better of me about two weeks later and I basically have a go at him.

 

This keeps going on back and forth, until eventually he just tells me we shouldn't talk to each other any more, not like we had been doing that much for the past 8 months anyway. I still cling to the broken friendship, but he ends up blocking me on every platform/site I knew him by anyhow, and I'm just left wondering where the hell I went wrong, and how such a seemingly good friendship fell to ruin so abruptly.

 

I end up sinking further into depression since I no longer have my "bestie" to vent to, and there's several other things happening in my life at the time that's just generally making my life miserable. I genuinely felt betrayed, especially since just a day or two before I told him, I basically said I wanted to tell him something, but was worried what his reaction would be, and he told me "nothing would ever make me stop talking to you". I clung to the words more than I should have.

 

Fast forward to now, and I'm currently engaged to my boyfriend who I thankfully met when my depression had sunk to perhaps the worst it had ever been in late 2015. Not sure what I would have done without him. Looking back now, I have no idea what I ever saw in my "best friend", he was literally just a person I spoke to and hung out with a lot. We didn't really have a lot of common aside from sharing some interest in games (he was a lot less into games than I was), and our personal life experiences differed a lot.

 

As for my fiance, I trust him with my life. One simple but important thing with him is, we can sit in silence on a train journey, or just chilling on the sofa, and it doesn't feel awkward at all. I can't say the same for old "bestie". As the saying goes, you know you have a true friend when you can both sit together without saying a word, and the silence doesn't feel awkward.

 

I've heard of similar stories and experiences to my own from other friends and acquaintances, you rarely ever end up staying with the first person (or first couple of people) that you fall in love with. It hurts, but life goes on, and unless you give up, you'll still always have a chance of meeting someone new, and meeting someone far better. Back in the day, I thought me and my best friend would stay together forever, and I thought he was the best friend I ever had, and the best person I ever knew. Nowadays, it's hard to not view him as anything other than an over-reactionary manchild who didn't seem to value friendship as much as he claimed.

 

Point is, just because someone seems to be awesome at the time, doesn't mean they are. And if they've cheated on you, they've kinda just proven that fact that they weren't the right person for you, and while it's obviously going to do its damage, there's no point in wasting too many tears over someone who never truly loved you or valued you enough to do something like that.

 

 

 

Was kinda weirded out when I saw the star icon on this thread, don't remember ever posting in here, but my memory is notoriously bad, especially when it comes to stuff I posted literally years ago.

 

I'm happy to say I'm still with the person mentioned in this post though, and he still remains the most important to me in my life.

 

If anyone has ever been cheated on or otherwise severely wronged by a partner, just remember you deserve more. I used to believe there wasn't much point getting my hopes up on being able to expect even common decency in a partner, but that's just because my self esteem was in the gutter, which many serial cheaters will prey upon. Anyone can do better than a cheater, no matter how unlovable you may feel, which I may know sound meaningless or perhaps condescending to those that may hate themselves, but it's really all a matter of perspective, and how you view yourself and the world can unconsciously attract the wrong kind of people.

 

But always remember that even then, you can do everything right in life, and still fail. Don't beat yourself up over it, life is notoriously unfair and chaotic, but that doesn't mean you're in the wrong or unlikeable - those who choose to wilfully cheat says a lot more about them than it does those who are cheated on.

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I've been cheated on and I cheated myself. At that moment we both realized this shouldn't last any longer. And after we ended 11 years of relationship I realized, I don't want any serious things, just one night stands are perfect for me

Edited by Baranov_925
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yup I have but near the end of the relationship it was pretty much over we both wanted different things. she wanted 6 kids and I didn't want any. It was a 2 year relationship but found someone else I'm a lot more happier with :) 

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I don't know for sure, but I've been in plenty of relationships where I had my suspicions. 

 

However I have cheated on an ex once. I really have no other excuse other than, my girlfriend wasn't giving me any, so I found it elsewhere. It was one time, I was 20 years old, a very different person then, and always felt bad about it...to an extent. While I really liked my girlfriend at the time, I always thought I cheated up. The girl I slept with was WAY out of my league. So I always felt like I regret cheating on her...just not who I cheated on her with. I know that makes me sound like a shitty person, but I'm just being honest...that girl was an accomplishment lol.

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Yeah.  Funny story too.  One of my 1st gf's.  I was in high school.  Found out from a friend she cheated on me.  2 shitty parts.  1) We were only together for 2 weeks, but were friends before that for like 3 years.  2)  I didn't even get to sleep with her yet  lol

 

Called her when I found out.  She admitted it.  Broke up with her immediately.  She starts crying, saying she wants to see me, it was a mistake, we need to talk in person, etc.  I said no way, we're done, fuck off, and don't talk to me anymore.  She calls back, I hang up.  Calls again so I leave the phone off the hook.  About 40 minutes later, guess who's knocking on my door.  Now I'm still a teenager and live with my parents.  Hear my mom get out of bed before I can and go down the stairs saying "who the fuck is this?"  lol  I'm leaning over the bannister to listen to the whole thing.  She opens the door and my now ex-gf is there crying her eyes out saying how she needs to see me and talk to me.  My mom says something like "look, I don't know who the fuck you are or what the fuck your problem is, but it's late and I need to wake up tomorrow at 5:30 for work.  So you two can figure this shit out some other time."  Ex started to say something and mom slammed the door in her face  lol

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  • 1 year later...

My boyfriend of five years (and who I've known for ten) recently cheated on me with a girl he's only known for about a year, and has completely ghosted me on everything.

 

So that's, uhhhh... great, to say the least. Depression is at an all time high, and I've gotten closer than ever before to taking my own life a couple of times to boot.

Thankfully with each blow from the little mental games he's been playing throughout all of this I've started to be less and less impacted by it, but it still hurts a lot.

 

I feel really bad for my siblings and friends for how much of a downer I've been while coping with everything. lol

Edited by Zephrese
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