Cassylvania's Miserable Little Pile of Platinums

[Cassylvania]

On 3/24/2021 at 8:46 PM, AJ_Radio said:

Shadow of the Colossus on the PS4 looks really tempting as well. Going to wait until I reduce my backlog by 20 games before I’ll consider buying it. Of course there’s PS Now which will let me choose many different PS4 games, but I’m not willing to pay for a subscription I’m not going to use much. 

 

I think SotC was a PS+ game. I own it for some reason, but I don't remember buying it.

 

23 hours ago, realm722 said:

Hahahah I felt like you were reading my mind when you wrote this. I had noticed you started the games ago ago(by your standards) and just sorta dropped it. But I'm very happy to hear you gave it such a glowing recommendation - and it was no fault of it's own that it got shelved for a bit. I'm currently going through the exact same thing with CrossCode and have a lot of positive things to say about it - plus I've heard others such as DQB2 and Transistor that for whatever reason I just dropped for awhile, came back, and loved. The only thing holding me back was what I thought was a lengthy completion time... but then I checked the 100% list and a lot of people have it completed in 3-4 days which means it should be no biggie. It hasn't gone on sale once yet but I'll def add it to my wishlist and if it hits that $15 sweet spot I'll prolly scoop it up - so thanks for yet another game you've placed on my radar.

 

I forgot to put my time to platinum. I think I finished in around 50 hours (15 in-game years), which is admittedly probably on the high end, but 3-4 days seems like a stretch to me. You'd have to know how to optimize your field pretty early on to get that. Throughout the game, I would reach a point where I felt I couldn't progress further until Sakuna leveled up, which only happens when you finish that year's rice.

 

I was able to pretty consistently get three levels per year. You might be able to do better.

 

17 hours ago, emmajessica12 said:

I started playing this game at the beginning of the month and thoroughly enjoyed my time with it. I got slightly bored with the combat and decided to have a break from it. I tend it pick it once a week and play a little of it and I agree with what you have said. Seeing you get the platinum has re-inspired me to pick it up more.

 

I think it's an OK game to play a little at a time. It might help to keep a notebook at your side and scribble down reminders of how you should be managing your farm each day. For example, I wrote down what ingredients to look out for, when to release/lock up my ducks, the ideal water depth for each stage, and so on... That makes it easier to jump back into, because it's very easy to forget what you should be doing.

 

11 hours ago, DarkSamurai69 said:

That was a great read of Sakuna: Of Rice and Ruin. Can't wait to try it out since it has been on my radar ever since it was announced. I enjoy your reviews/discussion about games and look forward to more.  

 

Thanks! Farming sims are my favorite genre, and it's really cool to see it combined with something like an RPG or action platformer. Maybe it'll get more people interested in this kind of stuff.

 

I'm not really feeling any of the other games on my list right now. I might just start something new. I made the mistake of playing too many "difficult" games at once, and it's burning me out pretty fast... But I'm not desperate enough to buy the House Flipper or Two Point Hospital DLCs. Those prices are ridiculous. Instead, maybe we'll see what other farming games I have on my list...

 

Maybe it's time for Doraemon.

Edited March 26, 2021 by Cassylvania

[emmajessica12]

5 hours ago, Cassylvania said:

Thanks! Farming sims are my favorite genre, and it's really cool to see it combined with something like an RPG or action platformer. Maybe it'll get more people interested in this kind of stuff.

 

I'm not really feeling any of the other games on my list right now. I might just start something new. I made the mistake of playing too many "difficult" games at once, and it's burning me out pretty fast... But I'm not desperate enough to buy the House Flipper or Two Point Hospital DLCs. Those prices are ridiculous. Instead, maybe we'll see what other farming games I have on my list...

 

Maybe it's time for Doraemon.

 I’m not sure if America has the same sale as here in the UK but in one of our sales (March madness I think) a couple of old harvest moon games very cheap. By the looks of the trailers it’s only a port so the graphics aren’t brilliant. But harvest moon games tend to be great farming sims. I spent my childhood playing them on DS so I’m certainly excited to pick it up. 

Edited March 26, 2021 by emmajessica12

[Cassylvania]

12 hours ago, emmajessica12 said:

 I’m not sure if America has the same sale as here in the UK but in one of our sales (March madness I think) a couple of old harvest moon games very cheap. By the looks of the trailers it’s only a port so the graphics aren’t brilliant. But harvest moon games tend to be great farming sims. I spent my childhood playing them on DS so I’m certainly excited to pick it up. 

 

I platinumed A Wonderful Life (it has some very annoying trophies related to cutscenes), and I think I already own Save the Homeland, but I haven't really been in a rush to play it. I wish they'd port or remaster the other older HM games. Friends of Mineral Town or Back to Nature would be great.

 

I won't even entertain the new games in the series. They look terrible. To this day, I don't think I've ever been more disappointed in a series than I am with Harvest Moon. I know the spirit of the series lives on through Story of Seasons, but it's sad to see what Natsume has become.

 

If you haven't played it, I'd strongly recommend My Time at Portia. The dupe glitch kinda ruins the game's intentions, but it also makes the platinum much more bearable. I'm tempted to say it's the best farming game I've played on PS4. I'd really have to think about that, though. Stardew Valley is clearly amazing. Graveyard Keeper was OK. Sakuna is up there. A lot of the games I've played can only marginally be considered farming sims.

 

I'm finding myself not really enjoying the other games I'm playing now.

[emmajessica12]

4 hours ago, Cassylvania said:

 

I platinumed A Wonderful Life (it has some very annoying trophies related to cutscenes), and I think I already own Save the Homeland, but I haven't really been in a rush to play it. I wish they'd port or remaster the other older HM games. Friends of Mineral Town or Back to Nature would be great.

 

I won't even entertain the new games in the series. They look terrible. To this day, I don't think I've ever been more disappointed in a series than I am with Harvest Moon. I know the spirit of the series lives on through Story of Seasons, but it's sad to see what Natsume has become.

 

If you haven't played it, I'd strongly recommend My Time at Portia. The dupe glitch kinda ruins the game's intentions, but it also makes the platinum much more bearable. I'm tempted to say it's the best farming game I've played on PS4. I'd really have to think about that, though. Stardew Valley is clearly amazing. Graveyard Keeper was OK. Sakuna is up there. A lot of the games I've played can only marginally be considered farming sims.

 

I'm finding myself not really enjoying the other games I'm playing now.

Yeah I can totally see what you are saying. I preordered Story of Seasons: Friends of Mineral Town as I loved the original. But eurgh, it’s just not the same. I mean sure it looks great but I found myself bored (I never did in the original). I have My Time at Portia at the top of my to buy list. Looks incredible.

 

I really enjoy my time with Stardew Valley, I haven’t played it in a while as I’ve been playing big games and two point hospital. I use Stardew as my relaxing game when I don’t have the time or energy to play a big intense game. I’ll never get the platinum on it though as I suck at Journey to the Prairie King. But it’s definitely one of the best farming games there is.

 

I’ve been feeling like that recently, none of the games I’ve played has held my interest. Sakuna just doesn’t seem to be going anywhere, I tried Assassins Creed Black Flag and it seems great but it’s not what I want right now. I ended up starting Dragon Quest and I’m now hooked haha. I hope you find a game you want to play soon!

[faint-magician2]

On 3/26/2021 at 11:39 PM, Cassylvania said:

Stardew Valley is clearly amazing.

I tried it, it was cool. The only things that blocked me were the two stupid trophies for that arcade game. It's Dark Souls in arcade games and you have to beat it without dying which I suck at. Still, Stardew is so popular I am not surprised it got a recommendation.

 

Sees last post. Yeah, Journey of the Prairie King! Why is that in the game? I know that they needed something for the bar but seriously, that arcade game should have been optional.

Edited March 28, 2021 by faint-magician2

[Grotz99]

On 3/26/2021 at 9:39 PM, Cassylvania said:

 

I platinumed A Wonderful Life (it has some very annoying trophies related to cutscenes), and I think I already own Save the Homeland, but I haven't really been in a rush to play it. I wish they'd port or remaster the other older HM games. Friends of Mineral Town or Back to Nature would be great.

 

I won't even entertain the new games in the series. They look terrible. To this day, I don't think I've ever been more disappointed in a series than I am with Harvest Moon. I know the spirit of the series lives on through Story of Seasons, but it's sad to see what Natsume has become.

 

If you haven't played it, I'd strongly recommend My Time at Portia. The dupe glitch kinda ruins the game's intentions, but it also makes the platinum much more bearable. I'm tempted to say it's the best farming game I've played on PS4. I'd really have to think about that, though. Stardew Valley is clearly amazing. Graveyard Keeper was OK. Sakuna is up there. A lot of the games I've played can only marginally be considered farming sims.

 

I'm finding myself not really enjoying the other games I'm playing now.

Looks like HM: A Wonderful Life and Save the Homeland are both on sale and I've been contemplating getting them for a while, but after reading this, maybe it's not worth it and I'd be better off picking up Stardew Valley again?

[Cassylvania]

On 3/27/2021 at 5:01 AM, emmajessica12 said:

I really enjoy my time with Stardew Valley, I haven’t played it in a while as I’ve been playing big games and two point hospital. I use Stardew as my relaxing game when I don’t have the time or energy to play a big intense game. I’ll never get the platinum on it though as I suck at Journey to the Prairie King. But it’s definitely one of the best farming games there is.

 

I hear they made Journey to the Prairie King much easier now. Something about being able to save mid-game and return to it later. Not sure I'll ever get around to it on console, but I enjoyed it on PC...

 

4 hours ago, Grotz99 said:

Looks like HM: A Wonderful Life and Save the Homeland are both on sale and I've been contemplating getting them for a while, but after reading this, maybe it's not worth it and I'd be better off picking up Stardew Valley again?

 

They're OK. Farming sims in general just aren't good for trophy hunting. They're either too easy, making you feel like you've wasted your money, or too grindy, making you feel like you've wasted your time. Even Doraemon: Story of Seasons, which is probably the best HM spiritual successor I could ask for, feels just a little off because of the way I'm forced to play it. Some genres just weren't designed with trophies in mind. Makes me wonder how I'd craft a trophy list, if I had that kind of power...

 

What are you working on for plat #100?

 

I see Hat Kid has pissed in my cereal. At least it's a good game this time. Not that I have anything against House Flipper or Two Point Hospital, but those aren't exactly games I'm dying to revisit... But she's going to have to join Ajna in the waiting room. I don't have time for DLC nonsense.

[Grotz99]

43 minutes ago, Cassylvania said:

What are you working on for plat #100?

Was going to make it Defender's Quest, but its really starting to get annoying with crashes near the end. I just got through the barrier of using no generic recruits so I just have a few more stars to get. If it keeps being annoying, I'll probably just make Demon Souls #100. Although, I'm playin coop with a friend now that we are on NG+ when we have a chance to play together, did not know until last night you can go 2v2 against invaders...

Edited March 31, 2021 by Grotz99

[Together_Comic]

6 hours ago, Cassylvania said:

I see Hat Kid has pissed in my cereal. At least it's a good game this time. Not that I have anything against House Flipper or Two Point Hospital, but those aren't exactly games I'm dying to revisit... But she's going to have to join Ajna in the waiting room. I don't have time for DLC nonsense.

 

Hat kid has saddened me this day .  Hopefully the DLC at least works...

[realm722]

22 hours ago, Cassylvania said:

I see Hat Kid has pissed in my cereal. At least it's a good game this time. Not that I have anything against House Flipper or Two Point Hospital, but those aren't exactly games I'm dying to revisit... But she's going to have to join Ajna in the waiting room. I don't have time for DLC nonsense.

 

You made me realize why my completion percentage had gone down and why I had a random B rank. I completed it back in August 2019 and thought there was no way DLC would get added. Welp - hopefully each of the $5 DLCs go on sale in the next few months before forcing us to fork over cash at full price. 

[Cassylvania]

On 4/1/2021 at 4:10 PM, realm722 said:

 

You made me realize why my completion percentage had gone down and why I had a random B rank. I completed it back in August 2019 and thought there was no way DLC would get added. Welp - hopefully each of the $5 DLCs go on sale in the next few months before forcing us to fork over cash at full price. 

 

I heard the DLC wouldn't make it to PS4 either. I was kinda hoping for AHiT2, but I guess this works. We'll get to it eventually.

 

Platinum #248 - Children of Morta

 

Let's discuss personality and the reason indie developers have a better understanding of how to make a good game than a lot of AAA studios. One of the first indie games I ever played was a 2D platformer called Thomas Was Alone that had graphics straight from Atari and could be beaten in a few hours. To this day, I laugh when I think how the literal shapes in that game were more interesting than the lumps of clay in some big budget titles and all the crap that comes out of Hollywood. There's no soul in art when your only objective is to make money. There has to be passion. Make it flawed, make it imperfect, but make something you care about.

 

And if I were a shill of a reviewer, I'd sit here and say yeah, the graphics are basic, yeah, the story is cliched, yeah, the gameplay is simple and repetitive, but I'd still give it a 10/10 because it did the only thing a piece of media needs to do: make me care. Why the hell is that so difficult for so many companies? I bought your game. I'm watching your movie. I subscribed to your channel. All you have to do is keep me entertained until the end. If you can do that, you have my good blessing.

 

Well, guys, this game kicks so much ass that I'm embarrassed for the other games on my profile. I'm not going to lie to you guys. I think The Surge is lame. Ys Origin does not have a good story. I'd rather stick my hand in a blender than play Phantom Doctrine again. Saints Row 3 is not as good as I remembered. I'm actually depressed that I finished this game as quickly as I did because now I have to go back to these and remember what it's like to play something mediocre.

 

Let's just discuss the story. There's an ancient evil called the Corruption that is devouring the land and it's up to the Bergson family to stop it. Throughout the game, you play as various members of the Bergson family (kinda like Eternal Darkness, but they're all alive at the same time and you can pick which one you want to be). In the beginning, you only have access to John, but you unlock new family members as you progress further. But since you all share the same last name, the narrator (literally the only person who talks in this game) always refer to you as "the Bergson," which is a nice touch on a game that has such strong familial themes. You end up unlocking seven characters and you're likely to find a favorite before the end, but the game definitely pressures you to try them all out. And by "pressures you," I mean you get a temporary fatigue penalty if you're using the same character repeatedly. You might find that annoying, but one of the advantages of using other characters is you can unlock abilities that are shared across all family members. For example, Lucy has a skill that lets her summon a hologram that distracts enemies. That's clearly useful in a twin-stick shooter, but if you get her high enough, every family member can trigger this ability. Combined with the fact that every family member is viable (and you need to get them all to level 20 for a trophy), you'll probably be jumping around a lot.

 

By the way, if I haven't made this clear by now, this is practically a roguelike and you can expect to die a lot. Especially if you play on Hard. (Not required for the platinum, but you might as well because dying gives you access to new cutscenes and I think it lets you unlock new characters sooner.)

 

Now, for some reason, all the female Bergsons are ranged fighters and all the male Bergsons are melee fighters. What does that mean? Well, it means the Bergson family name is about to dry up because why would you not pick a character who can attack from a distance? I sometimes wonder why they even bother with other classes in action RPGs. Gee, would I rather be the girl who can shoot arrows from halfway across the map or the dude who specializes in getting his face caved in by a purple monkey three times his size?

 

And don't start with the, "But C-dawg, you literally just said every character is viable." Because while you were saying that, Lucy launched a fireball at you. And another one. Chick is lighting the whole place on fire. You try to run, but you can't. And why is that? Because you wanted to be in on the action. Now your eyebrows are singed. Lucy is laughing. She's making those weird noises with her mouth. I think she's deranged. And now you see why you don't bring a sword to a magic fight.

 

Jokes aside, I'm not sure I need to say more. It's worth whatever price it's going for on the PS store. Let's just look at this beautiful artwork by DEL and try to come up with some clever captions. I'll go first.

 

 

John: Don't worry, girls! I'll protect you.

 

Linda: Hey dumbass, we already killed everything while you were hiding behind that tree. Why don't you go make us some sandwiches?

 

Lucy: This wouldn't have happened if the deer had ranged attacks.

[gruffiiti]

Thanks for the great review Cass!
 

I’ve seen Children of Morta pop up on quite a few of my PSN friends lists lately so I bought it a few weeks back. Looking forward to playing it once I wrap up a few other games already on the go.

[MyNameIs_Rainman]

Love the review! Children Of Morta looks like a solid game, just havent seen many people on my friends list play it, so to hear such a great review for this kinda puts it back on my radar again. I'll have to keep an eye out for a decent sale and snag this

[kingofbattle8174]

12 hours ago, Cassylvania said:

 

 

 

John: I'll keep watch over here while you carve that up, your welcome.

 

Linda: Oh, how heroic of you. 

 

Lucy: ewe this blood is making me squeezy. 

[Rally-Vincent---]

 

 

John: Uh oh...

 

Linda: Is it a Park Ranger?

 

Lucy: Just blame it on the Corruption.

[Briste]

John: What about these pants I got on? You think they're ok?

 

Linda: Imagine you're a deer. You're prancing around. You get thirsty. You spot a little brook. You put your little deer lips down to the cool, clear water - BAM. A fuckin' bullet rips off part of your head. Your brains are lying on the ground in little bloody pieces. Now I ask you, do you give a fuck what kind of pants the son-of-a-bitch who shot you was wearing?

 

Lucy: Yeah, what she said....

[faint-magician2]

On 3/31/2021 at 4:47 PM, Cassylvania said:

I see Hat Kid has pissed in my cereal.

So you opened up the site and saw that the Hat In Time DLCs, Seal the Deal and the one I can't name which has cat people living in a Cat Tokyo(saw a speedrun of the mission where Hat Kid is attacked by the cat mafia), are now released and have DLC trophies. *sigh*

 

The fact that you have to do all of the impossible challenges to get all of the stamps is terrible. I knew this would happen. I'm glad you still like the game, I may decide to delete the account that has it and never purchase it except on PC.

[Together_Comic]

9 hours ago, faint-magician2 said:

So you opened up the site and saw that the Hat In Time DLCs, Seal the Deal and the one I can't name which has cat people living in a Cat Tokyo(saw a speedrun of the mission where Hat Kid is attacked by the cat mafia), are now released and have DLC trophies. *sigh*

 

The fact that you have to do all of the impossible challenges to get all of the stamps is terrible. I knew this would happen. I'm glad you still like the game, I may decide to delete the account that has it and never purchase it except on PC.

 

So I've been playing through it and you can enable the accessibility mode to make it a lot easier if you really want too.  Doing that, you only have to complete the main challenge of the missions instead of also having to complete all of the bonus objectives.  That being said the challenges are a lot of fun anyway and I haven't had to much trouble with any of them normally except the bosses.  For $10 total you get two new levels that are pretty good so far.  I wouldn't necessarily jump ship yet.  She may have pissed in your cereal as Cass said, but maybe she's pissing milk.  The cereal may get a bit soggy, but eh its probably not to bad.

[AJ_Radio]

9 hours ago, Together_Comic said:

 

So I've been playing through it and you can enable the accessibility mode to make it a lot easier if you really want too.  Doing that, you only have to complete the main challenge of the missions instead of also having to complete all of the bonus objectives.  That being said the challenges are a lot of fun anyway and I haven't had to much trouble with any of them normally except the bosses.  For $10 total you get two new levels that are pretty good so far.  I wouldn't necessarily jump ship yet.  She may have pissed in your cereal as Cass said, but maybe she's pissing milk.  The cereal may get a bit soggy, but eh its probably not to bad.

 

Seems to be a trend to have an easy platinum but put in difficult/annoying DLC for the completionists. Days Gone is a good example, the platinum is roughly 30 - 60 hours but then you got a bunch of DLC that basically doubles that time investment on top of there being annoying challenges. Ugh.

 

A Hat in Time in ways reminds me of Super Mario 64, but I guess I'll delay in getting this game.

[faint-magician2]

On 4/5/2021 at 8:54 AM, Together_Comic said:

I wouldn't necessarily jump ship yet. 

So there is a Celeste Assist mode that lets you earn the Death Stamps for bonus challenges without doing them? Interesting.

 

On 4/5/2021 at 6:13 PM, AJ_Radio said:

Seems to be a trend to have an easy platinum but put in difficult/annoying DLC for the completionists. Days Gone is a good example, the platinum is roughly 30 - 60 hours but then you got a bunch of DLC that basically doubles that time investment on top of there being annoying challenges. Ugh.

 

A Hat in Time in ways reminds me of Super Mario 64, but I guess I'll delay in getting this game.

I was making connects to Super Mario Sunshine do to the secret time piece levels. One of them even has the rotating blocks from the Ricco Harbor secret!

 

Also, yes, many games I like had frustrating DLC with hardcore modes. Ni no Kuni 2 is one example - I'd love to platinum it and I could platinum it, but the first DLC's trophies deal with two higher difficulty levels and to get them you have to

Spoiler

refight King Rat again... and he one-shots you if you don't dodge

. ?

 

I might play the game on my other account and try the DLC there but no promises.

Edited April 7, 2021 by faint-magician2

[Cassylvania]

I enjoyed the captions, guys. We'll have to do that more often.

 

On 4/5/2021 at 9:54 AM, Together_Comic said:

 

So I've been playing through it and you can enable the accessibility mode to make it a lot easier if you really want too.  Doing that, you only have to complete the main challenge of the missions instead of also having to complete all of the bonus objectives.  That being said the challenges are a lot of fun anyway and I haven't had to much trouble with any of them normally except the bosses.  For $10 total you get two new levels that are pretty good so far.  I wouldn't necessarily jump ship yet.  She may have pissed in your cereal as Cass said, but maybe she's pissing milk.  The cereal may get a bit soggy, but eh its probably not to bad.

 

... In retrospect, I'm not going to respond to this.

 

On 4/5/2021 at 7:13 PM, AJ_Radio said:

A Hat in Time in ways reminds me of Super Mario 64, but I guess I'll delay in getting this game.

 

I bought the DLCs. Dunno when I'll play them, but AHiT earned my trust. One of the most purely fun games I've played on the PS4.

 

Alright... I know you've been wondering how I've spent the past week. This one is going to hurt.

 

Platinum #249 - Doraemon: Story of Seasons

 

No, it's not another Pokemon clone. It's a Harvest Moon clone combined with an apparently popular Japanese anime, which I only know because I kept getting stuff about the show every time I tried to Google something about the game. Which I had to do a lot because, as with a lot of farming sims, information is sparse. But that also makes me excited for writing this review because I know you know nothing about the game. (Nor will you play it, but that's beside the point.)

 

Graphically, it reminds me of Valkyria Chronicles. Everything is hand-drawn, the colors are muted, and the screen has a grainy white border for that storybook feel. I'm actually impressed at how much work went into detailing each home, as there are some areas of the game (such as other people's bedrooms) that you'll never go into.

 

The townspeople are mostly forgettable. This is probably the most cardinal sin in the game. The cutscenes you get from time to time are fine and show a bit more personality to each character, but their regular dialogue is short and barely worth reading. Most of the townspeople just say some variation of, "I'm busy right now," even though you can tell they're clearly not. They also cycle between the same two or three lines. They remark on the weather or the time of day a lot, but you'll get people asking why you're up so early (when it's 11 AM) or that it's almost lunch time (when it's 3 PM). It's bizarre. 

 

There's also an awkward stiffness to their movements. This probably comes from having each NPC follow a strict day-to-day agenda. It's the kind of game where you can't slow anybody down and talking to anybody freezes time. If you stalk someone for a day (I recommend Sandy because damn, that girl fine), you'll see just how unnatural it is. It's made even weirder by the fact that they won't accept gifts while they're eating or sleeping, so you might find yourself standing next to their table or bed until they get up so you can give them a present. Because that's not creepy at all.

 

Of course, as you become better friends with someone, they'll start to say new things, but it's rarely interesting. Most villagers are dull. The mayor is probably the best character because he openly advocates for child labor and his theme song kicks ass. I guess you can think of him as the game's main antagonist. The town doctor is presented as being "a bit strange," which sounded like a promising trait at first, but it turns out he just likes giving experimental medicine to children. Tae Takemi did it so much better.

 

There's also this annoying wholesome to everything that I hated. One of the reasons I didn't like Ni no Kuni as much as I should have. Every character (except the mayor) is either unabashedly cheerful or a little standoffish. There's no in between. And their names...my God. I don't know how the Japanese version handles this, but the English translation gives everybody a name that matches their profession, and it's not even subtle. For example, the family next door raises cattle. The grandmother is Aries, the grandfather is Taurus, and their granddaughter is Rem. I want to kill them all. Even worse, the mayor's name is Ryam. THAT'S NOT EVEN A NAME. If they wanted to be clever (and I'm not even sure that's what they were going for), why not just go with Roy? You could probably do something cute with his last name. Just...why!?

 

I have mixed opinions on the sound. The music is good. It's not intrusive, but it can get old. What does get old, however, is your character squealing "YUP!" and "EEEEE!" every time he performs an action. Watering a crop? YUP! Chopping down a tree. EEEEE! EEEEE! EEEEE! And since this is a farming sim, you'll be doing those things a lot. You'll also be talking to NPCs a lot. Instead of actual voice acting, though, each line of dialogue is accompanied by a sound, noise, or some short phrase (in Japanese) to represent how that character is feeling. This is ultimately why you'll play the game on mute. Unfortunately, the majority of your time will not be spent on growing crops. It'll be spent on doing laps around town and giving people presents, as making friends is the only way to progress the story.

 

This is where I have a hard time forgiving the game. In my town, we have this Thai restaurant that makes really good food. Very spicy too. The only problem is they're open from noon until 2 PM, then they close for three hours, and then they open back up until 8 PM. Why? Do people not need to eat from 2 to 5 PM? Do the employees just play poker in the back? And before you start telling me that this is a common practice in Asian culture and it saves on operating costs, AT WHAT POINT IN THIS REVIEW DID I SAY SOMETHING THAT MAKES YOU THINK THIS GAME WANTS TO BE REALISTIC? I haven't even gotten to the spirit faeries yet.

 

To make matters worse, there are about ten stores in town, each is closed one or two days of the week (no, not the same days), and they ALL have a weird schedule like that. For example, the clinic is open every week day, except Thursday (when they're closed), from 10 AM to noon and 2 PM to 5 PM. They're closed at all other times, except Saturday, when they're open from 10 AM to noon. Every store is like that, but they're all different, so good luck keeping them straight. The only reason I remember that one in particular is because the clinic is the furthest away and I got sick of going there for nothing. Can you imagine if someone in town had an actual medical emergency? "Sorry, doc can't see you right now. He's at the pub for the third time today. Gotta eat lunch in shifts because the restaurant closes as soon as he sits down."

 

I guess that's my biggest problem with the game. Everything is stilted or mechanical. For example, if it's going to rain in the game, it'll happen at, say, noon and then stop at 3 PM. There's no randomness. NPCs are robotic. Animals barely move. Even events feel stiff. Doraemon will always show up a few days early to tell you what's going on, he'll encourage you to enter, and you'll either play a short mini-game (OK, watermelon smashing was fun) or enter a contest with two other contestants (and they'll stupidly announce third place first and then second, so you already know who is going to win). Also, pretty sure dialogue is repeated across events. I attended the Goddess Festival twice (only by mistake the second time) and Noby said the same lines both times, which included some snarky remarks from the mayor. Doraemon also shows up at your door to remind you about the event, but that might stop after you attend it once. In either case, it means the game just repeats itself after one in-game year. Compare that to something like HM64, which can essentially be played forever, but which has a storyline that lasts for the first three years.

 

The controls are OK. You won't waste stamina using a tool unless something valid is selected. Tools can be upgraded to achieve better results. Having to pick up a chicken to collect its egg every morning is stupid, but my biggest complaint is having too many actions mapped to the same button. You'll often "use" an item instead of gifting it to someone because you weren't standing in the right spot. This is unintentionally funny because it's like you're torturing people by eating their favorite food right in front of them. Try that in real life. If the girl you're crushing on likes chocolate ice cream, buy a cone, go up to her, and just gobble it down. See if that makes you friends.

 

An underrated feature is that the default for trying to rest or nap is "no," but selecting it twice will change the selection to "yes." That might not mean anything to you now, but it ultimately means you can go to sleep in the game simply by pressing X next to your bed three times, instead of having to press X once, then up or down, then X again. Same number of button presses, but you're not fidgeting around or pressing "no" multiple times by mistake. (And you know if I'm complimenting this little detail, I'm really struggling to say something nice.)

 

I somehow didn't even mention the story yet. If this was a normal farming sim, I'd say, "Oh, your grandfather died and left you his farm," but this is a Japanese game, so naturally it begins with the most absurd opening to any video game I've ever played. I'm not even kidding. Let me try to summarize the first seven minutes of the game. This is purely from memory, but it opens with you (a squawky little geek named Noby) falling asleep while doing your homework. Your mom yells at you, so you and your best friend Doraemon, who is a large robotic blue cat with no ears from the future, decide to play outside. You find a strange-looking seed, so you plant it and Doraemon whips a magical pink door out of his kangaroo pouch and you teleport to your friends across town. When you return to the seed, it has turned into a giant beanstalk, which causes a storm to appear and sweep you and your friends to a distant land. You awake outside a farm, where a boy with green hair greets you. You can't understand his language, so Doraemon stuffs Translation Gum down the boy's throat, allowing you and everybody else in town for some reason to communicate. The boy naturally invites you into his house and then gives you the spare farm next door because, in true Tom Nook style, all children in this village must work. In order to get back home, you will need to the help of the town goddess and Doraemon's gadgets, which were scattered by the storm. That's...the opening, guys. That's the game you chose to buy.

 

Unlike most farming sims, there are no marriage options here. Which is probably for the best, since your character is like 10 years old. He clearly has a crush on Sue, but I could barely tell her apart from the other girls in town. In fact, I was still mistaking her for Jemma and Rem by the end of the game. If you're anything like me, you'll want to hit on Sandy, but don't expect her to talk about anything but fishing. Even at four hearts, the extent of her dialogue at every festival was, "Why aren't there any marlin festivals?" I think the girl's a little slow, if you know what I mean.

 

The trophies are fair, I guess. Only in the sense that the developers could've been real assholes. There are events related to getting each villager's friendship up to a certain level, and it takes a very long time to reach max friendship. Fortunately, most of them only need four or five hearts to unlock the trophy-related content. You can speed things up by giving people items they like, but you'll probably want to use a guide for this. It’s not clear what items each villager prefers. For example, you would think Cooper, who collects bugs, would want bugs. He doesn't. He wants strawberry milk. Taurus wants baked beans. The old lady wants poop. These people are freaks. Sandy, the game’s clear MVP, wants marlins and she's the only one being transparent about it. But they’re rare, can only be caught in summer, and are probably worth too much to give away. Just give her a seashell. In fact, that's how you'll spend most of your time in the game. Picking up random stuff off the ground and giving it to the first person you run into. Later in the game, you’ll just buy stacks of items you need, stalk the people you still need to trigger events, and then go right to bed each day. It gets old fast.

 

If you want my guide for beating the game quickly, the trick is to get to Autumn 1 with the first house upgrade and the Stew set. You're going to want yams and oil, which you can buy in stacks of 99. Then you just make all the French fries you can. You can sell them for a huge profit. Within a few days, you'll have over a million gold, which is more than enough to buy everything you need for the platinum. A lot of the trophies are just for doing something once, like having one cow or growing one crop. The rest are connected to events, which can be a pain to trigger. I'm not sure if the guides out there are entirely correct. Big G's fourth event took me forever to find.

 

One of the only positives I can give is that inventory space is less of a problem than you'd expect, once you have the appropriate upgrades. Doraemon's gadgets are also pretty useful. Especially the Anywhere Door. The Searching Cane and Human Locomotive would be more useful if you didn't have to sit through a loading animation every time you want to use them, stayed active, and were something you obtained before you're almost done with the game. The pacing isn't nearly on the level of Graveyard Keeper, where I felt like I kept getting the upgrades I needed at just the time when the tasks were beginning to feel monotonous. Instead, I guess it's more like My Time at Portia, where I stopped doing things like growing crops and raising animals because it was pointless and there were better ways to make money. Of course, I liked My Time at Portia because there was more to do in that game. I can't say the same for Doraemon.

 

This is a harsh review for two reasons. First, I expect better from my farming sims -- especially one that is supposed to be the spiritual successor to my favorite series growing up. (I will eviscerate the newer HM games if I ever get around to playing them.) Second, I paid full price for this game. Unlike Sakuna, however, which I thought was a wonderful action RPG/farming sim, this one fell well short of expectations. (Plus, it retails at $60. I preordered Sakuna for $30.) Sorry, guys, but it's not worth a recommendation. It's eye candy at best and a soulless, creativity-starved grind at worst.

 

 

Edited April 11, 2021 by Cassylvania

[AJ_Radio]

You make my wall of texts look like small fry in comparison.

[realm722]

I was going to make a really long elaborate post about how much I wanna thank you for venturing into these less traversed waters of farm sim games for the rest of us who just wanna have more experiences like Stardew Valley, but I feel like this meme I made sums it up better than anything I could type will.

 

 

[Cassylvania]

21 hours ago, AJ_Radio said:

You make my wall of texts look like small fry in comparison.

 

I had a lot to say about that one. I think I feel more obligated when it's a genre I know a lot about or it's a game that would fly under most people's radar.

 

It did get me thinking, though. I mentioned in my Sakuna review that farming games just aren't really designed for trophy hunting, but I'm not sure I would have even enjoyed Doraemon from a purely gameplay perspective. The cracks really began to show after the 10-12 hour mark. Before that, I thought it was a pretty good game.

 

3 hours ago, realm722 said:

I was going to make a really long elaborate post about how much I wanna thank you for venturing into these less traversed waters of farm sim games for the rest of us who just wanna have more experiences like Stardew Valley, but I feel like this meme I made sums it up better than anything I could type will.

 

?

 

To recap:

• Doraemon, no.
• Sakuna, absolutely.
• My Time at Portia, yes, but use the dupe glitch.
• DQB and DQB2, yes and yes.
• Slime Rancher, yes.
• Yonder, if you're really bored.
• Graveyard Keeper...well, you already know, but it's a grind. Zombie DLC is a must.
• Farming Simulator 20xx, meh.
• HM: AWL, meh.
• Marenian Tavern Story, LOL no.

Think that's all of them so far. Let me know if you guys want me to try out anything else. Light of Hope and One World probably won't happen. Little Dragon's Cafe is a maybe, but it looks really disappointing. Deiland is a maybe. I could see me doing Stranded Sails or Summer in Mara. Littlewood, if it comes to PS4. Farm Together...I need to know more about.

[Rally-Vincent---]

But C-Dawg, you need to make some time for tactical turn based combat.

 

Finally an opportunity to use "but C-Dawg".