Scidillydocious Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 Post your best joke. Q: Why can't a blonde dial 911? A: She can't find the eleven. This is not the best but its awesome Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragon-Archon Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 (edited) Q: Why were ancient Egyptian children confused? A: Because their daddies were mummies. Edited April 20, 2015 by Dragon-Archon 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scidillydocious Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 hahahahah thats a cool one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janistheberzins Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 Q: Why do a blonde open a pack of milk directly in a shop?A: Because the pack has writing: 'Open here' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yami Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 (edited) I got a good one but it's pretty offensive so I don't know if I should post I'll post it in a spoiler, sorry if you're German, no offence intended ! Q: What does a German person say when he opens an oyster ?A: "Gestapo, sofort aufmachen !" Edited April 20, 2015 by DarKNesS_X 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scidillydocious Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 do you know that all mothers are racist...... because they always take the clothes away when the black clouds appear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Dr_Mayus Posted April 20, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted April 20, 2015 2 hipsters walk into a bar. The first one did it before it was cool, the second one did it ironically 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scidillydocious Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 i dont get it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Royalredpanda Posted April 20, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted April 20, 2015 It's not the normal Q&A joke, but this is pretty much the only one I remember. A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead.As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!"The panda yells back at the bartender, "Hey, I'm a PANDA! Look it up!" The bartender opens his dictionary and sees the following definition for panda:"A tree dwelling marsupial of Asian orgin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves. 16 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragon-Archon Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 It's not the normal Q&A joke, but this is pretty much the only one I remember. A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the bartender, "Hey, I'm a PANDA! Look it up!" The bartender opens his dictionary and sees the following definition for panda: "A tree dwelling marsupial of Asian orgin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves. LOL that one's funny . 2 hipsters walk into a bar. The first one did it before it was cool, the second one did it ironically I don't get it either. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PSNP is crap i left Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 It's not the normal Q&A joke, but this is pretty much the only one I remember. A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the bartender, "Hey, I'm a PANDA! Look it up!" The bartender opens his dictionary and sees the following definition for panda: "A tree dwelling marsupial of Asian orgin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves. That's amazing. Alright, here's one from me. Q: Why did the skeleton go to the party alone? A: Because he had "No body" to go with. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scidillydocious Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 whats as big as an elephant but weighs nothing at all? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragon-Archon Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 whats as big as an elephant but weighs nothing at all? A riddle... in a jokes thread . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scidillydocious Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 i felt like saying it, i dont want to make a riddle thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr_Mayus Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 i dont get it I don't get it either. Oh I don't like explaining jokes A hipster likes stuff before he/she thinks anyone else likes it. So if the first Hipster goes into the bar that is OK because he did it before anyone else did it. Now when something becomes mainstream it ruins it for a "hipster" because they want to like it as well but too many people are doing it. So if you do something 'ironically" then it becomes OK again. For example you do something you like but you pretend you hate it so people think you aren't getting in on a trend. This is why the second Hipster goes into the bar ironically because his friend had already made it cool by doing it first. Can I go now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Boooda Posted April 20, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted April 20, 2015 I went to a zoo one time and all they had was a dog......It was a shih tzu. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scidillydocious Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 I went to a zoo one time and all they had was a dog... ...It was a shih tzu. funny one man 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyLish79 Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 OK, brace yourselves... Two cannibals were eating a clown. One said to the other, "Does he taste funny to you?" 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scidillydocious Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 OK, brace yourselves... Two cannibals were eating a clown. One said to the other, "Does he taste funny to you?" dats clever Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yami Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 (edited) I remembered another one, not as offensive this time. A little daughter to her father: D- Father, what is it that girls have down there ? F- That my girl, is the door to happines. You'll learn when you get older. D- Ok, dad ! But what is it that boys have down there then ? F- Well, boys hold a key that fits a door to happines. But you should be very considerate about choosing your key ! Why do you ask all this ? D- Well, I think you better change the lock on momma's door because I think the neighbour's key fits too ! *badum tss* Edited April 20, 2015 by DarKNesS_X 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scidillydocious Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 hahahahahaha this one is offensive. whats the last bottle the woman uses after a party.... fairy 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yami Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 this one is offensive. whats the last bottle the woman uses after a party.... fairy Lmao ! Stab of the week that one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post AndyLish79 Posted April 20, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted April 20, 2015 When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did – in his sleep. Not yelling and screaming like the passengers in his car It's hard following a sex manual when you're dyslexic. I spent the last 20 minutes looking for my girlfriend's vinegar 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StrickenBiged Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 Erm... https://psnprofiles.com/forums/topic/22508-the-psnp-joke-thread/ Anyway, my jokes are there... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thegirlruka Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? A couple snowballs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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