Smevin's Regular, Every Day, Normal Ass Gamer Attempts at Trophy Hunting

[rjkclarke]

On 19/10/2021 at 10:59 PM, YaManSmevz said:

Hundo #5: Max Payne

 

 

I'm a bit late on this one - so I gave it another read, enjoyed it just as much the second time!

 

Fantastic review man - it's a hell of a game Max Payne.....

 

.........I'm a bit gutted they  haven't gotten around to putting Max Payne 2 out on PS4 yet, and I doubt they will either...... Not only is it my favourite Max Payne game, it is also one of my favourite games ever too.

 

On 19/10/2021 at 10:59 PM, YaManSmevz said:

The story is told with a stunning mish mash of Hong Kong action, classic film noir dialogue, and graphic novel presentation. Like The Killer and The Big Sleep got in a fight and Frank Miller broke it up.

 

Man that's a hell of a good description - like, startlingly accurate too.

 

I'm dreading those blood-trail sequences myself - whenever I get around to this one - I always found them so easy to just screw up or get lost during.

 

On 19/10/2021 at 10:59 PM, YaManSmevz said:

Granted, a lot of the faces Sam Lake's titular protagonist makes are goofy as hell, but that's part of the charm

 

The voice acting is stellar, and must be said that as much as Davids Hayter and Bateson are Solid Snake and Agent 47 respectively, James McCaffrey is Max Payne. He just breathes so much life into a character that could've easily been a stereotypical "gritty detective,"

 

Well - I mean, Sam Lake/Jarvi's face and Max's face are the same thing...... So I guess Sam's just a goofy looking fella, one of my friends always described what Max looks like as a cat that's been caught in the middle of doing his business...?

 

I don't know if you've seen this before (it's quite short anyway) but it's a nice little reunion, albeit a remote one between Lake and Mcaffrey, and it is spooky to see how much Sam Lake, still looks like Max even after all these years.... I love how much this whole franchise clearly means to both of them..... Sam Lake is one of my favourite writers to ever put pen to paper in video game form....

 

 

Thanks for this fantastic review man! it's always great to get a reminder like that of why exactly you loved a game series like Max Payne in the first place.

 

 

On 27/10/2021 at 8:00 AM, YaManSmevz said:

Platinum #36: Rocket League

 

Here in my car, I feel safest of all

 

 

 

I also really enjoyed reading this one, especially as I've virtually played no Rocket League at all, so it was a big learning experience  - in a way it made me a little less hesitant about playing it myself in the future.

 

Especially as I very much had the same initial experience as you.... I played it at a friends house, and was like "what is this.... I'm supposed to hit the ball in the goal but I keep jumping right past it.".... I just found it interminably frustrating..... This was like years and years back, when it was first given away as a PS+ title.

 

It's nice to see that eventually it grew into something you really enjoyed playing.

 

I'm curious to see what you make of The Warriors game, which I assume you're going to get around to reviewing at some point down the line.

 

Keep killing it man!

Edited October 28, 2021 by rjkclarke

[YaManSmevz]

1 hour ago, rjkclarke said:

 

I'm a bit late on this one - so I gave it another read, enjoyed it just as much the second time!

 

Fantastic review man - it's a hell of a game Max Payne.....

 

.........I'm a bit gutted they  haven't gotten around to putting Max Payne 2 out on PS4 yet, and I doubt they will either...... Not only is it my favourite Max Payne game, it is also one of my favourite games ever too.

 

Thanks, buddy!

 

It really is! It's such a great concept and executed so well. I'm also really bummed about MP2 being left out - I agree, it's my favorite as well. I wonder if there's some technical reason they can't port it, surely it would make them some money!

 

1 hour ago, rjkclarke said:

I'm dreading those blood-trail sequences myself - whenever I get around to this one - I always found them so easy to just screw up or get lost during.

 

 

Well - I mean, Sam Lake/Jarvi's face and Max's face are the same thing...... So I guess Sam's just a goofy looking fella, one of my friends always described what Max looks like as a cat that's been caught in the middle of doing his business...?

 

I assume I was making faces like Sam Lake while I braved those blood trail sequences the first time!

 

Aw man, those are horrible. It's a real shame because the sequence is brilliant, but that section is so needlessly tricky.

 

That's great? now I'm picturing a cat bein like "They came in at the worst possible time... I covered it with sand and slinked off into the night."

 

1 hour ago, rjkclarke said:

I don't know if you've seen this before (it's quite short anyway) but it's a nice little reunion, albeit a remote one between Lake and Mcaffrey, and it is spooky to see how much Sam Lake, still looks like Max even after all these years.... I love how much this whole franchise clearly means to both of them..... Sam Lake is one of my favourite writers to ever put pen to paper in video game form....

 

 

Thanks for this fantastic review man! it's always great to get a reminder like that of why exactly you loved a game series like Max Payne in the first place.

 

Thanks for that! This video has popped up in my recommended videos a few times, but I've never watched it - I'm glad I have now, it's great! You're right, he looks eerily similar, he's aged very well!

 

1 hour ago, rjkclarke said:

I also really enjoyed reading this one, especially as I've virtually played no Rocket League at all, so it was a big learning experience  - in a way it made me a little less hesitant about playing it myself in the future.

 

Especially as I very much had the same initial experience as you.... I played it at a friends house, and was like "what is this.... I'm supposed to hit the ball in the goal but I keep jumping right past it.".... I just found it interminably frustrating..... This was like years and years back, when it was first given away as a PS+ title.

 

It's nice to see that eventually it grew into something you really enjoyed playing.

 

Thanks dude! Yes, it can be super frustrating - the physics are excellent, but as a result so precise that if you don't hit the ball just so it can go flying pretty much anywhere (that you don't want it to go). Once you start getting a feel for it though, it can be pretty addicting!

 

1 hour ago, rjkclarke said:

I'm curious to see what you make of The Warriors game, which I assume you're going to get around to reviewing at some point down the line.

 

Keep killing it man!

 

After Vice City, I decided to start going through the Rock Star games I've completed, so The Warriors is absolutely in the pipeline!

[YaManSmevz]

Monthly Update with Ya Man Smevz

October 2021

 

Hello there! I've noticed how good some of y'all are at keeping track of your status as far as goals and such, and realized I didn't really have a system for that. Since I started trophy hunting I've been keeping track of my progress in my head, but as I'm sure you can imagine it's not the most reliable method, and a lot of information slips through the proverbial cracks. This is why I've decided to start this meaningless, highly narcissistic monthly post!

 

I chose to start this with October, since it was a year ago now that I decided to really give completionism a go. Obviously i don't have exact stats, but this is more or less what I know about where I was a year ago:

 

I had roughly 23% overall completion, easily over 1000 unearned trophies, six platinums, and I was level 195 or so.

 

Now, my stats are as follows (excluding today, as it is now November):

 

79.58% overall completion

551 unearned trophies

3.11 trophies per day

38 platinums

Level 306

 

Not too shabby - a year well spent, I dare say! Since then I've managed a minimum of a platinum a month, and am currently on a 34 day trophy earning streak. My longest is 36, and I'm fairly certain I'll be able to beat it.

 

Now that all THAT is out of the way, I can get into the action I saw this month, the whole point of this post!

 

I completed five games, but only one plat. I've been aiming for two or three per month this year, so I'm a bit disappointed, but real life gonna real life, not much you can do about that.

 

Family Feud and Rocket League have been conquered, but EA UFC 3 remains at large, and will haunt my dreams for some time, but I still plan on handling that. Now, for my November goals:

 

1. Lower unearned trophies to below 500, and

2. Earn at least four platinums, very doable since Hotline Miami and The Witness are nearing their end, and Wolf Among Us, delightful as it may be, is pretty much a guaranteed plat.

 

Gaming Hitlist

 

Hitman - it's damn near did at this point, I've pretty much got Marrakesh left.

 

Hotline Miami - just in the process of A+ing everything, about a third of the way through and I gotta say, absolutely loving it.

 

The Witness - The Town, Endgame and *shudder* The Challenge. Quite nervous about this one, as puzzle games are definitely NOT something I excel at, but it's been a great experience. I've never had so much fun being intellectually bullied?

 

Yakuza 0 - was off to a great start with this one, need to get back to it.

 

Final Fantasy IX - if there was one trophy I could get that would alone make November a success, I think it would be Hail to the King.

 

I need to get the hang of the Arkham Asylum combat challenges, get back to UFC 3 at some point, and of course the other games I entered the Fall challenge with, but for now I do believe the fellas mentioned above have top priority.

 

Thanks for reading, and wish me luck? November ho!

[Platinum_Vice]

15 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

I had roughly 23% overall completion, easily over 1000 unearned trophies, six platinums, and I was level 195 or so.

 

Now, my stats are as follows (excluding today, as it is now November):

 

79.58% overall completion

551 unearned trophies

3.11 trophies per day

38 platinums

Level 306

 

 

Dude this is huge. Big ups for you. ?

 

Sounds like you're like me and occasionally enjoy the difference in the numbers sometimes more than the actual gaming. ?....      ?

 

15 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

 

Gaming Hitlist

 

Hitman - it's damn near did at this point, I've pretty much got Marrakesh left.

 

Hotline Miami - just in the process of A+ing everything, about a third of the way through and I gotta say, absolutely loving it.

 

The Witness - The Town, Endgame and *shudder* The Challenge. Quite nervous about this one, as puzzle games are definitely NOT something I excel at, but it's been a great experience. I've never had so much fun being intellectually bullied

 

Yakuza 0 - was off to a great start with this one, need to get back to it.

 

Final Fantasy IX - if there was one trophy I could get that would alone make November a success, I think it would be Hail to the King.

 

I need to get the hang of the Arkham Asylum combat challenges, get back to UFC 3 at some point, and of course the other games I entered the Fall challenge with, but for now I do believe the fellas mentioned above have top priority.

 

Thanks for reading, and wish me luck November ho!

 

Keen to know what else is on the hitlist after these games with the higher priorities. No rush though, but interested.

 

[YaManSmevz]

4 hours ago, GonzoWARgasm said:

 

Dude this is huge. Big ups for you. 

 

Sounds like you're like me and occasionally enjoy the difference in the numbers sometimes more than the actual gaming. ....      

 

 

Keen to know what else is on the hitlist after these games with the higher priorities. No rush though, but interested.

 

 

Thanks man!

 

And you are not wrong. I find myself browsing my own profile more than I'd care to admit, looking at the percentages and thinking about what I can do to raise certain numbers. Very smellin-your-own-farts stuff! Ay, this website has corrupted us?????????

 

Wow, I appreciate hearing that. I'm trying to keep a limit on upcoming games out of fear of putting peeps to sleep! Methinks when I do this next month I'll try to lay out my goals a bit more in depth - this time I more felt the need to catch up on the progress (and yes, self-fellate a tad), I think think next one will be more structured.

[Heather342]

*subtlety influencing your next game choices*

 

Hitman 2......Hitman 3.....?

 

And if you need help on the multiplayer sniper trophies in 2 I'm happy to help out ?

[DrBloodmoney]

14 minutes ago, Heather342 said:

*subtlety influencing your next game choices*

 

Hitman 2......Hitman 3.....

 

And if you need help on the multiplayer sniper trophies in 2 I'm happy to help out

 

[YaManSmevz]

5 hours ago, Heather342 said:

*subtlety influencing your next game choices*

 

Hitman 2......Hitman 3.....

 

And if you need help on the multiplayer sniper trophies in 2 I'm happy to help out

 

Thank you, I'll keep that in mind!

 

Also since I started this Checklist and got back into Hitman, I'm extremely tempted to steal your idea of making Hitman 3 platinum #47?

[Heather342]

1 hour ago, YaManSmevz said:

 

Thank you, I'll keep that in mind!

 

Also since I started this Checklist and got back into Hitman, I'm extremely tempted to steal your idea of making Hitman 3 platinum #47

Oh yeah, you should do it! ?

 

I mean, I know it doesn't show up on a milestone or anything, but I'll always know it was my #47, the trophy icon is 47, the description is 'Complete all 47 trophies'. It was super satisfying for my absolute nerdiness ?

[YaManSmevz]

Platinum #21: Manhunt

 

I always feel like somebody's watchin' me...

 

Loathe as I am to use the C word always thrown at Rockstar in those days, it simply can't be left out of any review of this game.

 

Controversy.

 

Ugh. Get it off the page, get it off!!

 

Grand Theft Auto had it, but also came equipped with such a sense of humor as to soften the hard edges into something ultimately cartoonish. Max Payne didn't have the exact same approach, but its tongue in cheek nature and over the top cinematic aesthetic also served to balance out the rampant bloodshed. In short, both franchises had a counterbalance for the brutality at hand. Then comes along Manhunt, which does not.

 

I can only assume that Rockstar had grown tired of being a socio-political punching bag, and figured if they were going to receive renewed blame for video game violence every time a new game dropped, they may as well push the envelope as far as it could go. Notably, developers nearly walked out over the line they were crossing, and used the perfect word for how you feel when you play it: "icky."

 

While violence in video games was already very well documented, Manhunt just hit different. Hitman 2: Silent Assassin, which preceded Manhunt by a mere year and some change, comes to mind as a comparison. Both are widely viewed as murder simulators, which is not inaccurate. Hitman isn't cartoonish (per se), and wasn't wildly unrealistic in its depictions of assassination. But there was a sense of accomplishment, of triumph upon a successful hit, complete with fanfare as you seek an exit.

 

In Manhunt, absolutely nothing is glorified. The murders you commit don't inspire a feeling of achievement. There is no job to complete and feel safe afterwards, and there certainly isn't a defensible protagonist. Even in the Hitman reboot, you can throw a battle axe into someone's face or feed them into a wood chipper, and yet the depiction pales in comparison to that of a simple baseball bat across the head in Manhunt.

 

This thing doesn't try to sugarcoat anything - you are murdering people. The sound alone, which is outstanding by the way, really sells it - you can hear the gurgling blood when you slit a throat, the cracking of a skull, your victims' final gasps for air, all clear as day. They legit fight and struggle as you carry out your executions. Even the dull gunshots somehow manage to sound dirty and unglamorous. It all just feels so real.

 

And what's worse is that you're tasked with getting as high a rating per chapter as possible, which requires going for the most horrific executions you can pull off. It's mortifying, and then satisfying, and then the fact that you're satisfied with pulling off a high risk, especially vicious murder mortifies you even more! You're really confronted with the monstrous barbarity you're taking part in, forced to take a big long look, and I thought this approach was brilliant - it's truly the only way a game with this level of unapologetic carnage could ever work.

 

You start the game as a man on death row receiving his lethal injection... except he wakes up afterwards. When you come to, you're told that a snuff film director has paid off the police to fake the whole thing, and now you're at his mercy, starring in your own snuff film with several gangs coming after you in a kill-or-be-killed scenario.

 

Over the course of the game, you realize the movie you're in is merely one of a series - this has happened several times before, with each prior protagonist meeting a gory end. For the first half of the plot you're playing along, with the director in your ear, incessantly urging you to get as visceral as possible with your kills, and taunting when you don't. In the second half, you're trying to find an escape from the game, which is somehow even more unnerving because without the director, you're on your own, taking on far worse than the ragtag gangs you'd been pitted up against to this point.

 

The director, masterfully voiced by Brian Cox, adds a whole new layer of slime to the experience. He's such a creep, clearly getting off on watching the havoc you're wreaking at his behest, as evidenced by the immortal "OH my GOD! I've had an accident."

 

Even more than Cox and the impressive amount of sleaze he's able to summon for the role, the score is absolutely skin crawling. It's a truly disturbing, dark ambient gem, and makes the game feel even more tense and frightening. When you get made, the music gets a new layer, bass-laden and chaotic, as if to simulate your heart pounding as you run from maniacs who want to gouge your eyes out with a shard of glass. Definitely a great game to play late at night with the lights out, if you're into that sort of thing.

 

The presentation is so immersive, too. The menu feels like the title screen to a bootleg DVD - even the manual contributes to the feel. Vice City's looked like a travel brochure, Max Payne's looked like a police dossier, and Manhunt's manual looks like a snuff film catalogue - complete with a link to a (now defunct, sadly) website for the fictitious company producing all these snuff films.

 

So, the story is excellent. The approach is nihilistic and challenging. The music and voice acting are top notch. As for the gameplay, well... I know that anyone who plays something older when used to more modern games will be quick to speak ill of the controls, and... well, they really are pretty bad, and this is one of those times where everybody is right.

 

Playing Manhunt, you can see the control schemes of later Rockstar games starting to take shape as well as the death rattle of older, inferior functions. A nascent version of the targeting system that would appear in San Andreas is here, but so is the borderline useless first person perspective from Vice City. With the horizontal turns bafflingly inverted!

 

The gameplay is at its best as a stealth game, hands down. Sneaking, hiding in shadows, memorizing guard's routes to find a way around them, are all at least decently done. Halfway through however, guns are introduced, and the way they're handled is less than ideal, and the less said about the melee combat the better!

 

So should you consider playing this game? ...I think so! Granted that patience is a huge prerequisite for getting used to the antique controls as well as a high tolerance for dark subject matter, but if you can check those boxes, I think it would be worth it. Something I forgot to mention - with the usual ratio of savagery and silliness flipped, what humor there is to be found here is much darker and less juvenile. You've got a skinhead walking up to a decapitated comrade and saying "shit, are you okay?" for instance, and then there's my personal favorite gang in the game, the Smileys - mentally disturbed individuals with yellow smileys painted on their face. They roam the mental institution and babble to themselves - one is frustrated about missing shoes, one is in a bloody dress, assuming the identity of the wife he presumably murdered years ago ("Kids, call the sheriff - Daddy's been drinking again!"), and one apparently thinks he's a suburban wife planning a cocktail party ("I'm sure you don't need reminding that murdering your host is a terrible faux pas!"). It's funny, but also adds to how terrifying it is when these deranged people spot you!

 

The gameplay has not aged especially well, but everything else has stood the test of time, and handily proved why it was (and still is) such a heavy hitter in Rockstar's stacked 2000s line-up.

 

THAT Trophy: 5-Star Fiend

 

On the higher difficulty, not only are your enemies more aggressive, but damage racks up considerably faster - it's absolutely crucial that you are always hidden when possible. The game shares Max Payne's issue of walking around a corner and getting one-shotted a lil too easily as well, not to mention that your radar is gone. A grip of the levels were a biiiiiiiiitch - the later levels in particular are SWARMING with heavily armed guards - the only saving grace is that at this point, you know your way around and the safest routes to take.

 

Feels like I went on a bit longer than I meant to again... sorry n shit.

 

....I'll let myself out.

 

EDIT: I was up until almost 6am when I initially wrote this and totally lost steam at the end of the review - I like leaving my reviews as is and this kind of touch up is very rare, but it felt necessary. Towards the end it started to feel like I was writing a book report or something, and I think it showed.

 

Letting myself out now for real!

Edited November 10, 2022 by YaManSmevz

[rjkclarke]

On 04/11/2021 at 0:39 PM, YaManSmevz said:

Platinum #21: Manhunt

 

"I always feel like somebody's watchin' me..."

 

 

That was a killer review man - yes pun intended this time ?

 

......... Seriously though - that was excellent, it was nice to read about the game with much more detail than most people give it outside of being a "MURDER SIMULATOR!" Yes, you should always shout those words whenever you think of them! ?

 

Better late than never right?

 

Seriously though, apologies for the lateness. I haven't wanted to even look at a keyboard the last few days after that seriously long NieR review I wrote........

 

.......... Which is actually one of the first times in a long time I'm actually satisfied with a review I've written and don't have too many hang ups about it after the fact. So I guess that is a positive. I also forgot to reply to you in my own thread, and a few others too, so I'll make a point of doing that later on. Otherwise I'll feel like a massive jerk. 

 

Anyway........ Nonsense about me aside, this is about your awesome review of Manhunt!

 

You did it again! You made me actually want to pick up and play something that I haven't even thought about in years. Honestly, I've never actually finished Manhunt, I played it a little bit when I was about 15 I think. I knew even then that I probably shouldn't have been, it's one of the few times I genuinely felt disgusted with myself playing a video game, it was almost as if every single action just felt so grimy, and uncomfortable. To the point where I just left it alone and never went back to it. Suffocating someone with a plastic bag, or doing your very own impression of New Jack the Wrestler, by slicing people up with broken glass was just so brutal.

 

On 04/11/2021 at 0:39 PM, YaManSmevz said:

While violence in video games was already very well documented, Manhunt just hit different. Hitman 2: Silent Assassin, which preceded Manhunt by a mere year and some change, comes to mind as a comparison. Both are widely viewed as murder simulators, which is not inaccurate. Hitman isn't cartoonish (per se), and wasn't wildly unrealistic in its depictions of assassination. But there was a sense of accomplishment, of triumph upon a successful hit, complete with fanfare as you seek an exit.

 

This is a great comparison point actually.

 

The thing that's always felt different between the two for me........

 

..................if I had to hazard a guess, I'd say it's a little bit of a context thing, You are a professional killer as 47, so you are automatically a little desensitised to the idea of killing right off the bat.  Whereas Manhunt thrusts you into that world against your own will. So the killing you do ends up being that much more visceral and brutal, because you aren't trained to make it seem smooth. Where 47 might slip in and slit someone's throat - Manhunt would have you turn someone into a pin cushion with a piece of glass, where 47 might use the fibre-wire, Mr Manhunt protagonist would just stick a plastic bag over your head and watch you gurgle and die.

 

It's like you mentioned there's a sense of accomplishment that comes with Hitman - that you've done the job well, you've left no trace, and you've just strutted straight out of the level with your suit on as if you were never there. So in a way, I think , that ends up softening your actions, instead of making you directly confront them in a more real way like Manhunt did - obviously I've not played the whole thing, so I'm going on my fairly hazy memory of the game. 

 

So I guess perhaps I should pick it up and play it again...... I could probably handle it better as a functioning adult than I could when I tried to play it before.......

 

....... I won't lie, the idea does - to borrow the speech patterns of some of my west country family - it does "Scare I!"........... but not as much as this does.

 

 

 

There's plenty of scary things that exist in this world - and then you remember few are actually scarier than Danny Devito's little yellowed undercrackers - where he just looks like the most unsettling hairy child imaginable!

 

Again - brilliant stuff man, I'm really enjoying your Rockstar revisit you've been on lately. It's definitely reminded me I need to fill in some of the gaps in my collection too, and get some of these awesome games played!

 

 

Edited November 9, 2021 by rjkclarke

[YaManSmevz]

13 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

 

That was a killer review man - yes pun intended this time

 

......... Seriously though - that was excellent, it was nice to read about the game with much more detail than most people give it outside of being a "MURDER SIMULATOR!" Yes, you should always shout those words whenever you think of them!

 

Better late than never right?

 

Seriously though, apologies for the lateness. I haven't wanted to even look at a keyboard the last few days after that seriously long NieR review I wrote........

 

.......... Which is actually one of the first times in a long time I'm actually satisfied with a review I've written and don't have too many hang ups about it after the fact. So I guess that is a positive. I also forgot to reply to you in my own thread, and a few others too, so I'll make a point of doing that later on. Otherwise I'll feel like a massive jerk.

 

Don't be silly, I think it would require a considerable amount of effort for you to come across as a jerk! Your Nier review is marked for when I can give it the proper time, I've no doubt it's outstanding (as per usual!).

 

Thank you, I appreciate that! Also I have a confession to make... I made my first

review edit on this one. I lost momentum writing the review, I wanna say I spent like four hours writing it up - I always post up and write my reviews in one shot on my phone, and this was an example of why that isn't always a good idea?

 

13 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

You did it again! You made me actually want to pick up and play something that I haven't even thought about in years. Honestly, I've never actually finished Manhunt, I played it a little bit when I was about 15 I think. I knew even then that I probably shouldn't have been, it's one of the few times I genuinely felt disgusted with myself playing a video game, it was almost as if every single action just felt so grimy, and uncomfortable. To the point where I just left it alone and never went back to it. Suffocating someone with a plastic bag, or doing your very own impression of New Jack the Wrestler, by slicing people up with broken glass was just so brutal.

 

Nice New Jack reference! Fitting, because you really do end up making the gang members look like Mass Transit!

 

I found the approach fascinating - it's so deplorable, yet you're so drawn in to the concept. You just feel dirty playing while not wanting to stop. More than a few times I wondered "what does this say about me as a person??"

 

13 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

This is a great comparison point actually.

 

The thing that's always felt different between the two for me........

 

..................if I had to hazard a guess, I'd say it's a little bit of a context thing, You are a professional killer as 47, so you are automatically a little desensitised to the idea of killing right off the bat.  Whereas Manhunt thrusts you into that world against your own will. So the killing you do ends up being that much more visceral and brutal, because you aren't trained to make it seem smooth. Where 47 might slip in and slit someone's throat - Manhunt would have you turn someone into a pin cushion with a piece of glass, where 47 might use the fibre-wire, Mr Manhunt protagonist would just stick a plastic bag over your head and watch you gurgle and die.

 

It's like you mentioned there's a sense of accomplishment that comes with Hitman - that you've done the job well, you've left no trace, and you've just strutted straight out of the level with your suit on as if you were never there. So in a way, I think , that ends up softening your actions, instead of making you directly confront them in a more real way like Manhunt did - obviously I've not played the whole thing, so I'm going on my fairly hazy memory of the game.

 

I absolutely agree with this, 100%. I would add that the depictions of murder are a bit different - as violent as an assassination could be, in Hitman they felt a bit sanitized - like how it would look in a mainstream film or something. In Manhunt it feels like you stumbled upon something you shouldn't be seeing. And as far as viciousness goes, a fiber wire is going to lose to a plastic bag every time!

 

Plus, Diana and the director both approve of the player's actions, but Diana's "Well done, 47" feels a hell of a lot better than Starkweather's "You're really doin it for me... I ain't been this turned on since.. well, let's not go there."

 

 

14 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

So I guess perhaps I should pick it up and play it again...... I could probably handle it better as a functioning adult than I could when I tried to play it before.......

 

....... I won't lie, the idea does - to borrow the speech patterns of some of my west country family - it does "Scare I!"........... but not as much as this does.

 

 

 

There's plenty of scary things that exist in this world - and then you remember few are actually scarier than Danny Devito's little yellowed undercrackers - where he just looks like the most unsettling hairy child imaginable!

 

That's a fair point - if I have to split someone's skull with a crowbar, that's pretty bad... but if you have to do it while playing as Danny Devito in that scene, I'd probably just shelve the game altogether and forget it ever existed. We can only take so much!!

 

14 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

 

Again - brilliant stuff man, I'm really enjoying your Rockstar revisit you've been on lately. It's definitely reminded me I need to fill in some of the gaps in my collection too, and get some of these awesome games played!

 

Thanks so much bro, that means a lot! I'm definitely having fun with revisiting all these games, just hope I can keep it as fun for the poor souls who end up reading about it?

[YaManSmevz]

Platinum #40: Hotline Miami

 

He came into your apartment, left the bloodstains on the carpet

 

I've mentioned before how fond I've grown of older, SNES/Arcade style graphics and gameplay being given the modern generation treatment - and it may be recency bias, but... Hotline Miami is a contender for the crown.

 

Is Hotline Miami better than Mark of the Ninja? Shiiiiiiit..... that's gonna take a better mind than mine to determine (lookin at the good Doctor for that one). Spoiler alert, though - Hotline Miami easily made it into my Post-Platinum-Play Posse!

 

Holy fuck, what a dizzying experience this game was, and in the best way possible! I remember sneaking a peak at the trophy list before getting into it, and seeing things like "Die 1000 Times" or "Kill 1989 Enemies," and being intimidated, thinking it would be a grind. Now that I'm more familiar, I know how laughable that thought is!

 

Hotline Miami is about as frenetic as it gets. From the moment you're introduced to the woozy, neon atmosphere, you've got to figure out how to briskly get through these levels without getting hit, because you literally get hit once and it's over. The great thing is that yes - you're gonna die a lot - but the music and the rhythm never stop. You're constantly reinserted into the level until you notice the patterns and develop a strategy to complete it, and it never fails to satisfy. Also, the story absolutely grabs you - who are these dudes in the masks? Who's leaving these messages with veiled language telling you to cap some fools? Why is this one guy working at all these places you stop at between levels? Who is the girl you end up rescuing a few chapters in?

 

Like Manhunt, this game's violence is obscenely over the top - frankly, I think we're fortunate that they went the 16-bit route, because if Hotline Miami had Ghost of Tsushima level graphics, we'd all be pretty traumatized! Also like Manhunt however, we're confronted with the slaughter we're gleefully taking part in at the end of each chapter. The (fucking phenomenal and surprisingly diverse) soundtrack booms and throbs, providing us with an intensely catchy, rhythmic backdrop to all the chaos, but once the chapter is complete, it suddenly stops, and now you have to make your way back to the car, observing the massacre you single handedly undertook while a tinny static takes the place of the slammin tune you'd just been rockin out to. It's as though the adrenaline finally ran out, and all you're left with is the reality of your actions.

 

The lone criticism I have of this game - the controls are kinda finicky. It's way too easy to get yourself turned an angle off and not be aiming at an enemy properly, and with the fast pace Hotline operates at, naturally this easy mistake will almost always result in death. Also, and this may be simply because of the other games I was playing at the same time, but the aiming/shooting/throwing buttons make little sense - aiming with R2, shooting with R1, and throwing with L1 took some time to get used to.

 

This is one of those games where I'm borderline embarrassed that it took me so long to play. It is stellar, and an experience I would suggest to anybody. If you:

 

- Remember Smash TV

- Enjoy retro gaming

- Get down with fast paced games

- Like music that is good

- Have fun trying to figure out what's going on in a game

 

If any of those apply, this is a mandatory play.

 

THAT Trophy: Get A Life

 

This game was so good that going back for the high scores didn't feel like a chore at all - I was genuinely looking forward to it. In fact, going for the Bat-Man trophy was the first time I didn't truly enjoy myself playing this, and I thought that was what I would be writing about here. Not so much...

 

For the most part, it really was a lot of fun trying to score as highly as I could, and even chapters that a lot of people cited as a source of trouble came, well not easily, not by a longshot - but more or less free of excess frustration.

 

Except for Chapter Nine. Crackdown. Awwwww shit.

 

This asshole, let me tell you. It's not especially difficult to complete, but that A+ just wasn't happening. So many times, everything is lining up perfectly, all the bonuses are comin my way, and then a dog appears out of nowhere, or a wayward bullet hits me, and it was all for nothing, back to the beginning. And then when I do pull it off, execute my plan exactly as intended... well, all I'll say is that an A grade has never felt like such a slap in the face.

 

It had me so flustered that I went to Chapter 10, and after two A- attempts I decided to skip both, and before I knew it those two were all I had left. My methods clearly had been coming up short, so it was time for something different.

 

I tried the Carl approach, I tried the bold approach, nothing was working. Then Zack came to my rescue - I realized how massive the combo bonuses are if you can figure out a continuous path and just plow through each floor. It took some time, but it started working, and after a handful of tries, I had finally done it - Chapter Nine was in the books, and I could finally exhale. After that, with only 10 left, the killer instinct surfaced. I knew this was in the bag, and I started Chapter 10 lookin at my television with Max Scherzer eyes:

 

 

Within twenty minutes or so, I'm getting entire floors in a combo each, in the zone, oh so close to wrappin it up, I can feel it. Nothing is gonna stop me from getting this platinum right now, all I need is a few more tries an-

 

"Babe? You wanna go shopping with me?"

 

Uh-oh.

 

"Uuhhhh.... are you tryin to go right now? .....uuhhhh.... *shit* ....uuhh I mean if you particularly want me to come along..."

 

"Well, I'd like to go now if we can, I just need to make sure that dress I'm gonna buy matches your suit for the wedding."

 

Fuck.

 

We had talked about this the day before, and she is perfectly within her spousal rights to interrupt this moment.

 

"....okay honey, I'll hop in the shower right quick."

 

You've been granted a reprieve, Hotline Miami. But I'm comin for you.

 

Luckily we picked out a dress for her in record time, got back home and I knocked this fool out before it was time to get ready for work.??

 

Gotta love a happy ending!

Edited November 10, 2022 by YaManSmevz

[DrBloodmoney]

4 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

Platinum #40: Hotline Miami

 

Nice one man! ?

 

God, I'm so jealous right now - You get to write about Hotline Miami, where I am trying to write about LA Cops - which is essentially what you would get out the other end if you fed Hotline Miami to a 10-person human centipede... ?

 

 

Quote

Is Hotline Miami better than Mark of the Ninja? Shiiiiiiit..... that's gonna take a better mind than mine to determine (lookin at the good Doctor for that one). 

 

Don't joke - these are the future decisions that haunt my nightmares... ?

 

Quote

Holy fuck, what a dizzying experience this game was, and in the best way possible! I remember sneaking a peak at the trophy list before getting into it, and seeing things like "Die 1000 Times" or "Kill 1989 Enemies," and being intimidated, thinking it would be a grind. Now that I'm more familiar, I know how laughable that thought is!

 

Hotline Miami is about as frenetic as it gets. From the moment you're introduced to the woozy, neon atmosphere, you've got to figure out how to briskly get through these levels without getting hit, because you literally get hit once and it's over. The great thing is that yes - you're gonna die a lot - but the music and the rhythm never stop.

 

This - I think - is the single smartest decision they made in a game absolutely chalk-full of smart decision!

 

It seems like a small thing, and yet the net-negative effect that it would have on gameplay if the music reset every time you died would be so bad - not doing that, and recognising that the game music should be independent of the run is such a brainwave on the Dev's part - I was actually thinking about this the other day, when I was playing the time-trial stuff in Quantum Conundrum. That's a game I really like, and music is not a big part of it, but one of the few real criticisms in it is that there is some dialogue lines in the voice over that are triggered in each puzzle at set points - and some are right as you start. In some of the puzzles that are particularly tricky, or require very specific timing, you can be replaying them upwards of 50 times in a row, and hearing the same damned line every time is a nightmare - and basically mandatory, as there are audio cues you need to hear when playing, so you can't even just mute it!

 

 

Quote

Except for Chapter Nine. Crackdown. Awwwww shit.

 

This asshole, let me tell you. It's not especially difficult to complete, but that A+ just wasn't happening. So many times, everything is lining up perfectly, all the bonuses are comin my way, and then a dog appears out of nowhere, or a wayward bullet hits me, and it was all for nothing, back to the beginning. And then when I do pull it off, execute my plan exactly as intended... well, all I'll say is that an A grade has never felt like such a slap in the face.

 

 

I'll be interested to see what you think if you roll onto Hotline Miami 2 - it's a game that is still great in a lot of the same ways, but I think they really overshot the difficulty - basically, that game starts out at the level of frustration you are alluding to for Chapter 9 here... and only ramps up... and ends up being a lot more frustrating as a result.

 

I wonder, maybe, if it would feel less jarring if someone rolled directly onto it after Hotline 1 (my guess is, it would feel more manageable,) though that is a tall order, given how pounding Hotline feels by the time you finish! Second one still has a great soundtrack though!

 

 

 

PS - I love the story that your trophy log tells, given that you dotted between The Witness and Hotline Miami ?

 

I just have this image of you sitting deadly still, staring at the same puzzle in The Witness for 10 minutes, before erupting into Hotline rage...

 

 

   ...     ...    ... 

Edited November 10, 2021 by DrBloodmoney

[YaManSmevz]

4 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

 

Nice one man! ?

 

God, I'm so jealous right now - You get to write about Hotline Miami, where I am trying to write about LA Cops - which is essentially what you would get out the other end if you fed Hotline Miami to a 10-person human centipede... ?

 

Thanks Doc!

 

Dude, I have a weird anticipation for that review, I'm both dreading and excited for it? again, I have to thank you for sparing me potential misery!

 

It makes me think of the Michael Keaton movie Multiplicity - Hotline Miami decided to make a clone of itself, and Hotline Miami 2 was born. However, HM2 wanted to clone itself, but a clone of a clone was bound to be a subpar mutation at best, and the result was LA Cops. In all likelihood, I'll probably just end up watching a playthrough!

 

4 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

This - I think - is the single smartest decision they made in a game absolutely chalk-full of smart decision!

 

It seems like a small thing, and yet the net-negative effect that it would have on gameplay if the music reset every time you died would be so bad - not doing that, and recognising that the game music should be independent of the run is such a brainwave on the Dev's part - I was actually thinking about this the other day, when I was playing the time-trial stuff in Quantum Conundrum. That's a game I really like, and music is not a big part of it, but one of the few real criticisms in it is that there is some dialogue lines in the voice over that are triggered in each puzzle at set points - and some are right as you start. In some of the puzzles that are particularly tricky, or require very specific timing, you can be replaying them upwards of 50 times in a row, and hearing the same damned line every time is a nightmare - and basically mandatory, as there are audio cues you need to hear when playing, so you can't even just mute it!

 

You hit the nail on the head with that one - every checkpoint I've ever been stuck at, where there's some sort of dialogue or specific sound/piece of music at the beginning, can absolutely grate after a while - especially if, as in your case, there's no way around it! This was a brilliant bypass to that, they were clearly mindful of how often you're going to die and restart in that game, and how critical it is to keep the momentum flowing. What would be the opposite of that line from the Simpsons at the Itchy and Scratchy meet and greet... boy, I really hope somebody got a raise for that stroke of genius!

 

5 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

I'll be interested to see what you think if you roll onto Hotline Miami 2 - it's a game that is still great in a lot of the same ways, but I think they really overshot the difficulty - basically, that game starts out at the level of frustration you are alluding to for Chapter 9 here... and only ramps up... and ends up being a lot more frustrating as a result.

 

I wonder, maybe, if it would feel less jarring if someone rolled directly onto it after Hotline 1 (my guess is, it would feel more manageable,) though that is a tall order, given how pounding Hotline feels by the time you finish! Second one still has a great soundtrack though!

 

I've heard that about HM2, and while HM certainly has that quality of leaving you wanting more, I'm feeling kinda hesitant to dive into the sequel. The first game hit the perfect balance of trickiness - it could definitely be frustrating, but never felt outright overwhelming, and there are already enough games on my profile that have me on the ropes without inviting another heavy hitter. We'll see, though... maybe I'll watch a trailer or gameplay video and be lured in. It is a fantastic style they've set up, after all!

 

5 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

PS - I love the story that your trophy log tells, given that you dotted between The Witness and Hotline Miami ?

 

I just have this image of you sitting deadly still, staring at the same puzzle in The Witness for 10 minutes, before erupting into Hotline rage...

 

 

   ...     ...    ... 

 

?????

 

Accurate.

 

Speaking of The Witness, a couple weeks ago I was taking a break while tackling the Monastery, I saw this commercial and it triggered the hell out of me...

 

I really need to get back on that horse. Just the End and the Challenge left, and I've been totally dragging my feet on it. I hear the challenge employs that mechanic where incorrect solutions shut off the panels, and I already hated when that would happen even WITHOUT a timer! Probably just too much in my own head... I'm like that kid who doesn't want to go home cuz he's in trouble or something!?

[Platinum_Vice]

13 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

 

 

 

 

^^At first I was like 

 

 

 

 

Then I was like

 

9 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

 

God, I'm so jealous right now - You get to write about Hotline Miami, where I am trying to write about LA Cops - which is essentially what you would get out the other end if you fed Hotline Miami to a 10-person human centipede... 

 

 

 

 

Then I was like

 

9 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

 

PS - I love the story that your trophy log tells, given that you dotted between The Witness and Hotline Miami 

 

I just have this image of you sitting deadly still, staring at the same puzzle in The Witness for 10 minutes, before erupting into Hotline rage...

 

 

   ...     ...    ... 

 

3 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Because I saw this

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[YaManSmevz]

 

Aww man.... @GonzoWARgasm already wins November. It wasn't even close.

 

Outta control???

[YaManSmevz]

Hundo #9: Hitman

 

Past the pyrotechnics, undetected and invisible

 

It speaks volumes about the grisly savagery of the last two games I reviewed when you stop to consider that a game where you kill people for money, in a staggering variety of ways no less, feels like taking it down a notch!

 

My lone experience with this series was 2002's Silent Assassin, and it was great. I loved the concept, but even more than that the freedom granted with completing the contracts. There's just something so enticing about a game dropping you into a location with a target, and bein like "Here's a silenced pistol, figure it out."

 

It was hardly perfect, but felt pretty sophisticated for the time - hiding bodies, assuming identities with disguises, assassinating your targets with a broad variety of methods, even poisoning food. You had everything you needed to come up with a plan to sneak your way to your victim and silently slink out, and it was so rewarding when you put together a solid strategy and pulled it off. Of course, while ill-advised, you could totally take the guns blazing route as well, which was arguably just as fun - the dinner party level (which Paris reminds me of in a few spots) and the first level (which there's no way Sapienza isn’t shouting out) were especially fun with this approach!

 

For whatever reason, I sat out every subsequent game, so I missed out on the drama this one was met with - "A new Hitman? I dunno, the last game was kinda iffy... and it's gonna be released in halves? Sounds pretty stupid to me. Okay, now it's being delayed.. wait, now it's being released in episodes?? Aw man, I'm not sure about this... and what's this shit about being online all the time?"

 

I was fortunate to bypass all that, because this is an excellent game. I've said before that this is how I choose to remember Silent Assassin, because this is clearly what they'd had in mind - it's a textbook natural progression, with every aspect thoroughly realized, rendering everything before it obsolete. They just nailed it.

Firstly, the locations are astonishing. The attention to detail is at such a high level here, be it the layout of the massive areas or the people occupying the space. I remember my mind being blown when I realized that every one of the hundreds of NPCs is on a loop, with no limit to how many you can interrupt and create more randomness, thus creating the most realistic crowd simulator that at least I've ever encountered. Not to mention the sheer size and versatility of the maps - Sapienza alone has four completely different story missions, not including the escalations, taking place in different parts of the map.

 

For a game that people feared would be a nickel and dimer, there's a wealth of content here, well worth paying full price for. You've got the Patient Zero mission, which includes all six locations. Then each location has its own mission with up to four contracts, along with another over-arching narrative (which I thought was superbly executed, and felt like it could've been the basis for a great movie - sadly, as far as I know, no such attempt has ever been made with this franchise. Ever. A pity, really). Then there were three bonus episodes, a bit smaller in scope but still every bit as fun, as well as escalation missions, which are exactly what they sound like. Lastly, all the challenges and opportunities provided a great way of keeping track of your progress, as well as encouraging you to see just how much the game has to offer.

 

A quick sidenote: I would've loved to have been in the room when they were naming the escalation missions, the titles are so fucking goofy. I would've thrown out "The Perplexing Pomposity" or "The Contrabulous Fabtraption" and I'm sure they would've gotten shortlisted.

 

The NPCs do still have an element of "DUUHHHH" to them - although I guess at least some of that is necessary, as Agent 47 looks like a walking ad out of Suspicious magazine - but they're a bit sharper this time around. I remember someone lookin at me sideways once and I was baffled, until I realized I was crouching, which made me think "Oh yeah, normal people don't really walk like that in a crowd, do they?" Anything out of the ordinary you do that they catch will get commented on, which sometimes is a total crack-up, as this video illustrates:

 

 

A lot of the dialogue is just funny, like "You need to stop throwing things" or "That's it, man! You're a jerk!" They also apparently feel this need to address you by your uniform, which after a while would just make me laugh. I’ve never once seen a landscaper, for instance, and said "hey, gardener!" It's just weird getting this unneeded confirmation of your disguise, but it also becomes another charm of the quirky dialogue, so I won't even pretend I'm mad at it!

 

The gameplay is a blast as well. The controls feel refined and navigating these towering worlds is always a joy. The amount of possible executions is spectacular, something they only would have dreamed of in the old days - poisoned fugu was the most outside the box you could get on Silent Assassin, but now it's just on another level entirely. From a watery grave in a toilet to falling coconuts, there are so many ends your victims can meet. So many ways, too, can you slither your way inside the target's inner circle. Agent 47 is an expert hacker who looks like a model and can perform a mean drum solo (because of course he can), so if you can imagine it, in all likelihood you can do it.

 

It's such a well done game, and it feels like the series has finally been done justice. Writing about it just makes me that much more excited to jump back into the reboot with the second installation. Given that Hitman 2 includes this game, maybe it means that this one has met the same antiquity as all the precious Hitman games, but what it's done for the franchise really can't be overstated.

 

THAT Trophy: Touring the Film Set

 

Nothing is particularly difficult once you get the hang of everything, which includes this trophy, but it's named here simply because of its bugginess. I was really in the swing of things, knockin out trophies and havin a great time, until I finished all the opportunities for The Icon and it didn't pop. I tried repeating a few, and still no success. Now - and I'm not proud of this - much like with Rocket League, I let the trophies take precedence over what was really important, which was just enjoying this great game I was playing. Rather, I let myself give into the frustration and I moved on to something else.

 

You know how you can stop playing a game, and then pick it up months later and somehow you're almost better at it? That's what happened here, and I picked up right where I left off. When it came time to re-tackle this guy, I was actually excited to play the opportunities again - like I should have been in the first place!

 

Sadly yet again, no success. But afterwards, one of the opportunities was unchecked, which was definitely a bug because not only had I completed it numerous times, it had been checked. I did it one more time and it was complete.

 

Did anybody else have weird bug issues with this game? I also noticed that if you put the PS4 in rest mode with this game running, it would often crash when you put it back on. I guess 47 has abandonment issues, who knew?

 

Next thing I write about will most definitely be a bit more light, methinks. As Sideshow Bob said to Cecil, "I'm all murdered out."

Edited November 10, 2022 by YaManSmevz

[Heather342]

Awesome write up ? but then I am rather fond of the new Hitman games. I have poured so many hours into it, trying out all the various ways to take out the targets. I would advise to play the next installment pretty soon, as the story arc does continue from where you left off after Hokkaido. By the time I played H2 in 2018 I'd forgotten some of the characters mentioned in the cut scenes, but it wasn't until I played H3 earlier this year and did the whole trilogy in one go that I saw what IO were going for. It really is a great game. 

Hitman 2 does have co-op trophies in the 3 sniper levels, I think the servers are still up for it, but if you need a co-op partner I'm more than happy to help you out ?

[YaManSmevz]

11 minutes ago, Heather342 said:

Awesome write up ? but then I am rather fond of the new Hitman games. I have poured so many hours into it, trying out all the various ways to take out the targets. I would advise to play the next installment pretty soon, as the story arc does continue from where you left off after Hokkaido. By the time I played H2 in 2018 I'd forgotten some of the characters mentioned in the cut scenes, but it wasn't until I played H3 earlier this year and did the whole trilogy in one go that I saw what IO were going for. It really is a great game. 

Hitman 2 does have co-op trophies in the 3 sniper levels, I think the servers are still up for it, but if you need a co-op partner I'm more than happy to help you out ?

 

Thanks so much Heather! I know how fond you are of these games, so your compliment means a lot to me? I was thinking of starting by replaying the missions from the first game before getting into the meat of the second one - like how you said about playing 3, just doing it all in order. I jumped back and forth between locations over the course of nearly two years so I don't remember where exactly all the cutscenes fit, so a refresher would definitely be nice.

 

I appreciate the offer, and think I will take you up on that! I'm still so intrigued by the fact that they toyed with a multiplayer mechanic at all, so I'm super intrigued by that as well! I'll see you out there homie?

[DrBloodmoney]

 

Excellent work, 47.

 

Glad you had a good time man, such an awesome game - and all the sweeter now, knowing there is so much great Hitman still out there waiting for you!

 

I’ve probably exceeded my “gushing about Hitman” quota for the decade at this point (and cemented it with the top scientific spot), but I still smiled incessantly at this:

 

1 hour ago, YaManSmevz said:

A lot of the dialogue is just funny, like "You need to stop throwing things" or "That's it, man! You're a jerk!"

… the number of random lines of bizarrely funny, ever-so-too-much-expositional dialogue never doesn’t make me happy!

 

You missed off my personal favourite line, from guards, heard on occasion all through the series:

 “Somebody’s doing something!”

 ?

[KindaSabbath]

Really nice write up dude! iirc my last experience with Hitman was Absolution? Maybe.. Long time ago now. My only Hitman game before that was Blood Money - I remember the mission: The Murder of Crows literally blew my fucking mind and I replayed it to death. Sick times. 

 

I used to love the screen after the missions with specific ratings in a news paper format. My friends find it funny because they like to be on some straight up Ninja shit, never being seen or heard. Then there's me blowing the shit out of everything that moves - claiming it's just a different kind of stealth - no one survives, still no witnesses. I'm still a ghost bitch ?

 

I've been meaning to check the newer games out for a while now. Maybe I should bump them up on the priority list! 

 

 

[YaManSmevz]

12 minutes ago, DrBloodmoney said:

 

Excellent work, 47.

 

Glad you had a good time man, such an awesome game - and all the sweeter now, knowing there is so much great Hitman still out there waiting for you!

 

I’ve probably exceeded my “gushing about Hitman” quota for the decade at this point (and cemented it with the top scientific spot), but I still smiled incessantly at this:

 

… the number of random lines of bizarrely funny, ever-so-too-much-expositional dialogue never doesn’t make me happy!

 

You missed off my personal favourite line, from guards, heard on occasion all through the series:

 “Somebody’s doing something!”

 

 

Praise from Caesar - thank you, my dude!

 

For real. I'm so excited to experience the rest of the trilogy, especially since by all accounts it only gets better!

 

Dude my favorite moment was in Sapienza, a mobster caught me hiding a body and he bellowed out "SOMEBODY CALL THE POLICE!" I was dyin? like on what planet would that be a mobster's first response? Also someone says something like "this clown needs to watch where he's going," and I wish I could remember where exactly, because I want to encounter that person while dressed as a clown.

 

Now that you've pointed that out I'm probably gonna constantly notice "Somebody's doing something" ???

 

4 minutes ago, KindaSabbath said:

Really nice write up dude! iirc my last experience with Hitman was Absolution? Maybe.. Long time ago now. My only Hitman game before that was Blood Money - I remember the mission: The Murder of Crows literally blew my fucking mind and I replayed it to death. Sick times. 

 

I used to love the screen after the missions with specific ratings in a news paper format. My friends find it funny because they like to be on some straight up Ninja shit, never being seen or heard. Then there's me blowing the shit out of everything that moves - claiming it's just a different kind of stealth - no one survives, still no witnesses. I'm still a ghost bitch

 

I've been meaning to check the newer games out for a while now. Maybe I should bump them up on the priority list! 

 

First of all, it's so nice to see you around the forums again?

 

Thanks bro! I'm glad you liked it, and hope you end up peepin the new games!

 

Bruh that was always such a good time, just blastin everybody??? I remember clearing out rooms and then stalking the place when guards stopped running to where I was, trying to make sure I took everybody out.

 

"Jesus 47, what the fu-"

"Job's done, nobody saw me, chill the fuck out."

"Well yes, but I mean.. did you really have to-"

"Shut up Diana, you know I know where you live."

".......right. So for your next mission..."

[Heather342]

2 hours ago, KindaSabbath said:

Really nice write up dude! iirc my last experience with Hitman was Absolution? Maybe.. Long time ago now. My only Hitman game before that was Blood Money - I remember the mission: The Murder of Crows literally blew my fucking mind and I replayed it to death. Sick times. 

 

I used to love the screen after the missions with specific ratings in a news paper format. My friends find it funny because they like to be on some straight up Ninja shit, never being seen or heard. Then there's me blowing the shit out of everything that moves - claiming it's just a different kind of stealth - no one survives, still no witnesses. I'm still a ghost bitch

 

I've been meaning to check the newer games out for a while now. Maybe I should bump them up on the priority list! 

 

 

I enjoyed playing Blood Money, but the controls were not the easiest ?. Though my favourite level in that one was the opera. Switching out the prop gun for a real one and having someone else do the kill for you while you watch from the rafters. Then your other target comes running in, drop the chandelier on his head and then just mosey on outta there ?

[rjkclarke]

11 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

Hundo #9: Hitman

 

Past the pyrotechnics, undetected and invisible

 

 

Fantastic review man!

 

I'd be lying if I said I hadn't read this already. I should have dropped a comment last night - but I'm kind of running on fumes of fumes right now - not that that's relevant, I just thought I'd let you know why I didn't reply at the time. That's why I was dropping rep points in the thread like they were going out of fashion - I was loving all the positivity - and it was lovely to see loads thrown your way that you absolutely deserve! It was a joy to read that review man.

 

The moral of the story is insomnia sucks, and so does not being able to get back to sleep the minute you wake up, which is why I was a little nonplussed when I woke up at 5AM on the dot this morning! 

 

This isn't about me though - so apologies for the stupid ramblings.

 

Nice to see Sapienza get shouted out - that's one of my favourite locations across all of the Hitman games - and that's pretty tough competition considering how good even some of the earlier ones from the Silent Assassin, Contracts and Blood Money Trio - the less said about Hitman Absolution the better I think. I mean they even shit-canned David Bateson really early into the development, before the fans got understandably livid,and they had to go back on it! Or something to that effect - I can't remember the exact details 

 

if you go to 45 seconds into this video - you can hear who the replacement was going to be

 

 

 

I think he sounds like a really generic investment banker - so I'm glad that was changed in the end (sorry not sorry William Mapother). Absolution has a lot of great moments though to be fair - like there's a really cool assassination sequence with a load of - how shall I say - erm, kinky nuns?

 

11 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

felt like it could've been the basis for a great movie - sadly, as far as I know, no such attempt has ever been made with this franchise. Ever. A pity, really).

 

Do you mean there's never been an attempt to make a great movie with this franchise? Because I agree with that statement if so. There's been two so far - neither of them good, and each one is pretty tough to watch for entirely different reasons - although my brother seems to really like the recent one - each to their own I guess.

 

 

11 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

 I’ve never once seen a landscaper, for instance, and said "hey, gardener!" It's just weird getting this unneeded confirmation of your disguise

 

Should I start fearing that I live in a video game world? Because that literally happened to me a few months ago - when I was doing some hedge trimming - I really hope they didn't notice the barcode on the back of my scalp 

 

I love the direction they've taken with the new series though - that freedom to just play around and have fun within the games sandbox is brilliant. I found it so easy to just get pulled into just randomly experimenting with all sorts of things - I love the fact there's like a really odd off-kilter costume in pretty much every level, that has specific fun challenges tied to them as well.

 

You got that point across so well - just the huge scope of everything there is to do in the game!

 

11 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

Did anybody else have weird bug issues with this game?

 

Yep - I had loads,some really weird A.I pathing ones as well - I had a similar one to the one you had in The Icon - except it was in Bangkok for me. I can't remember exactly which opportunity it was but it kept saying it was done - until suddenly it didn't. Strange, but I guess I can't complain too much!

 

Awesome that @Heather342 is offering to give you a hand with the co-op for Hitman 2 - but if something comes up - I'll happily step in and give you a hand with them instead if you need them - I guess I'll just sit on the subs bench haha!

 

I hope you love Hitman 2 as well  (I sure as hell did,) I really want to play Hitman 3 but I just stubbornly won't let myself until I get my hands on a PS5.

 

Those Hitman 1 levels in Hitman 2 are fairly interesting too - I've spoken about this with Doc a fair bit, about how subtly different they play compare to how they did in the version you've just played - it's why I never quite understood why people complained about their inclusion.

 

Hell of a great read as always man!

 

I think you've also nudged me in the direction of my next classic review, so thanks for that. I  think I'm going to cover Hitman 2: Silent Assassin through to Blood Money next. Been a while since I've covered sequential games.

 

I'm off to go and pour myself a lot of coffee - and get and play Afterparty.