Smevin's Regular, Every Day, Normal Ass Gamer Attempts at Trophy Hunting

[Heather342]

@rjkclarke I didn't really like Hitman Absolution, I guess coming from the newer games sandbox style moving into a really linear game like this was just too jarring for me ?. Whereas in the new games you can do anything you want to set up the kills, I didn't get that with Absolution at all, just shoot them in the head quickly and run away. The only level that felt like you had choices in how you approach it was The King of Chinatown, but that was the first level in the game, to me it all went downhill from there.

[DrBloodmoney]

18 minutes ago, Heather342 said:

@rjkclarke I didn't really like Hitman Absolution, I guess coming from the newer games sandbox style moving into a really linear game like this was just too jarring for me . Whereas in the new games you can do anything you want to set up the kills, I didn't get that with Absolution at all, just shoot them in the head quickly and run away. The only level that felt like you had choices in how you approach it was The King of Chinatown, but that was the first level in the game, to me it all went downhill from there.

 

Got to agree with @Heather342, RJ

 

I'd probably be considered an "Absolution Apologist", in the sense that I actually do think it's a game that is pretty good in a lot of ways  - but none of the ways in which it is good are things a good Hitman game should do.

 

Absolution is actually a pretty decent, interesting 3rd person stealth game - it has a fairly compelling narrative, looks good, has a pretty solid shooting system, and has a really interesting, fairly unique 'Southern Gothic' tone that is pretty difficult to nail in media (think the early parts of From Dusk till Dawn, or the desert sections of Natural Born Killers - all rattlesnakes, sweat, blood and diesel oil)....all of which is cool -   it just isn't a good Hitman game whatsoever.

 

EDIT - 

 

Oh, and I almost forgot @rjkclarke, Absolution commits the most grievous of errors, looking back - Jane Perry does a voice, but not Diana Burnwoods! ? 

It wasn't until the new trilogy that she took over that role, and turned Diana into the sexiest mistress in videogames ?

 

(I think 'Jane Perry as Diana' is probably my version of your 'Keeley Hawes as Lara' - indispensable, inimitable and indisputable! ?)

Edited November 18, 2021 by DrBloodmoney

[rjkclarke]

Oh boy - Holy crossed wires folks, on a major level.....

 

I don't think I ever said that I loved Absolution or anything - just mentioned that it has a few great moments which I stick by. For what it's worth I'd put it pretty low down in my personal list of preferred Hitman games. Probably even below Hitman GO, that has a little more strategy involved ?

 

18 minutes ago, Heather342 said:

I didn't get that with Absolution at all, just shoot them in the head quickly and run away. The only level that felt like you had choices in how you approach it was The King of Chinatown, but that was the first level in the game, to me it all went downhill from there.

 

I can't really argue with that - that's the unfortunate truth of  Hitman: Absolution.  I think there's one or two of the more open levels, that don't funnel you down corridors and make you take one set route that are pretty decent - but going in the direction that they did, just didn't quite work when compared against everything else in the series up to that point.  Certainly explains why they course corrected and went back to basics with the 2016 version.

 

16 minutes ago, DrBloodmoney said:

I'd probably be considered an "Absolution Apologist", in the sense that I actually do think it's a game that is pretty good in a lot of ways  - but none of the ways in which it is good are things a good Hitman game should do.

 

Again - you'll get no argument from me on that one.... I think Absolution is one of those titles that I'd enjoy a whole lot more if it wasn't the Hitman IP being used. I think it'd probably be better received for it anyway.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[DrBloodmoney]

1 minute ago, rjkclarke said:

Oh boy - Holy crossed wires folks, on a major level.....

 

Haha - sorry mate - for some reason I read too fast, and didn't realise you had played it - though this was a pre-play situation! ??

[rjkclarke]

17 minutes ago, DrBloodmoney said:

Haha - sorry mate - for some reason I read too fast, and didn't realise you had played it - though this was a pre-play situation! ??

 

No worries haha - yes I've played it,more than once unfortunately ? - the only one I haven't played is Hitman 3........

 

Although to be fair @Heather342, wasn't really suggesting I loved it either I don't think - just that Heather didn't...... I just didn't want people to think I was going to bat for a game I'm not particularly fond of ?

 

38 minutes ago, DrBloodmoney said:

Jane Perry does a voice, but not Diana Burnwoods! ? 

It wasn't until the new trilogy that she took over that role, and turned Diana into the sexiest mistress in videogames ?

 

(I think 'Jane Perry as Diana' is probably my version of your 'Keeley Hawes as Lara' - indispensable, inimitable and indisputable! ?)

 

I didn't know this though - I would assume it was her performance in Absolution that maybe made them take notice - and consider her for Diana  going forward. I mean she essentially fills a similar role in Absolution so it's possible.

 

Well that's certainly some high praise @DrBloodmoney - especially with that specific comparison.

 

Edited November 18, 2021 by rjkclarke

[KindaSabbath]

13 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

First of all, it's so nice to see you around the forums again?

 

Thanks brother. It's good to be a little more coherent this week and able to start shooting the breeze with everyone again!

 

13 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

Thanks bro! I'm glad you liked it, and hope you end up peepin the new games!

 

I'm sure I will eventually. Backlog is becoming the final boss of video games in general at this point! I swear, we all out here adding to eachothers like crazy. Great problem to have though, so I'm not complaining!

 

14 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

Bruh that was always such a good time, just blastin everybody??? I remember clearing out rooms and then stalking the place when guards stopped running to where I was, trying to make sure I took everybody out.

 

See, that's how it's done y'know. I call it aggressive stealth ?

 

14 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

"Shut up Diana, you're the only living person who knows how it went down. I can fix that"

 

??

 

12 hours ago, Heather342 said:

I enjoyed playing Blood Money, but the controls were not the easiest ?. Though my favourite level in that one was the opera. Switching out the prop gun for a real one and having someone else do the kill for you while you watch from the rafters. Then your other target comes running in, drop the chandelier on his head and then just mosey on outta there ?

 

No doubt. Rose tinted glasses and all. Exactly the reason that I've never replayed the master piece that is: Resident Evil Code Veronic X. 

 

Absolutely though - the variety on offer is a big appeal with Hitman. Allows for different playstyles and encourages exploration of how to murder people (bit dark when worded like that lmao ?)

[YaManSmevz]

10 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

Fantastic review man!

 

I'd be lying if I said I hadn't read this already. I should have dropped a comment last night - but I'm kind of running on fumes of fumes right now - not that that's relevant, I just thought I'd let you know why I didn't reply at the time. That's why I was dropping rep points in the thread like they were going out of fashion - I was loving all the positivity - and it was lovely to see loads thrown your way that you absolutely deserve! It was a joy to read that review man.

 

The moral of the story is insomnia sucks, and so does not being able to get back to sleep the minute you wake up, which is why I was a little nonplussed when I woke up at 5AM on the dot this morning!

 

Thanks buddy! Much appreciated as always. I'm sorry to hear your sleeping cycle is off, though! I have a lot of experience with that myself, it can be absolute hell. What'd the doctor say in Fight Club, valerian root and exercise? Crap, you're not up all night making soap, are you??

 

10 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

Nice to see Sapienza get shouted out - that's one of my favourite locations across all of the Hitman games - and that's pretty tough competition considering how good even some of the earlier ones from the Silent Assassin, Contracts and Blood Money Trio - the less said about Hitman Absolution the better I think. I mean they even shit-canned David Bateson really early into the development, before the fans got understandably livid,and they had to go back on it! Or something to that effect - I can't remember the exact details 

 

if you go to 45 seconds into this video - you can hear who the replacement was going to be

 

 

 

I think he sounds like a really generic investment banker - so I'm glad that was changed in the end (sorry not sorry William Mapother). Absolution has a lot of great moments though to be fair - like there's a really cool assassination sequence with a load of - how shall I say - erm, kinky nuns?

 

....well, far be it from me to denounce kinky nuns.

 

Yo Sapienza was my shit. No map was lacking, to be clear, but Sapienza just blew me away, from its beauty to its gentle bustling quality to its versatility. I already know that the coming games will have maps to give it a run for its money, but I already know it will remain a favorite.

 

And yuck. He sounds so awful, I barely mad it through a few sentences!

 

"Ya damn right at a PPPPPPrice!"

 

He's freakin spitting as he speaks, makes 47 sound like a fat slob! How they could even consider changing 47's voice, much less for something like that, is baffling. Lazy, generic action shit, which leads me to -

 

10 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

Do you mean there's never been an attempt to make a great movie with this franchise? Because I agree with that statement if so. There's been two so far - neither of them good, and each one is pretty tough to watch for entirely different reasons - although my brother seems to really like the recent one - each to their own I guess.

 

I was joking about how awful that Timothy Olyphant movie was! Like I was in denial of its existence. As I was writing this I saw that a second one was made, which I was unaware of, but from what I can tell about it, the less known, the better!

 

11 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

Should I start fearing that I live in a video game world? Because that literally happened to me a few months ago - when I was doing some hedge trimming - I really hope they didn't notice the barcode on the back of my scalp 

 

I love the direction they've taken with the new series though - that freedom to just play around and have fun within the games sandbox is brilliant. I found it so easy to just get pulled into just randomly experimenting with all sorts of things - I love the fact there's like a really odd off-kilter costume in pretty much every level, that has specific fun challenges tied to them as well.

 

You got that point across so well - just the huge scope of everything there is to do in the game!

 

 

Yep - I had loads,some really weird A.I pathing ones as well - I had a similar one to the one you had in The Icon - except it was in Bangkok for me. I can't remember exactly which opportunity it was but it kept saying it was done - until suddenly it didn't. Strange, but I guess I can't complain too much!

 

Don't worry, your secret's safe with me, 47clarke!

 

I thought the challenges were a brilliant touch. As if there wasn't enough content already, it's such a clever way to guide you to try new things. When I was getting to level 20 in Marrakesh I saw one to dump five bodies in a well, and as silly as it was I was having a good ol time?

 

I wish I hadn't let the bugginess get to me, it just happens with some games, and it's really not that big of a deal. Regardless, all's well that ends well, as they say!

 

11 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

Awesome that @Heather342 is offering to give you a hand with the co-op for Hitman 2 - but if something comes up - I'll happily step in and give you a hand with them instead if you need them - I guess I'll just sit on the subs bench haha!

 

I hope you love Hitman 2 as well  (I sure as hell did,) I really want to play Hitman 3 but I just stubbornly won't let myself until I get my hands on a PS5.

 

Those Hitman 1 levels in Hitman 2 are fairly interesting too - I've spoken about this with Doc a fair bit, about how subtly different they play compare to how they did in the version you've just played - it's why I never quite understood why people complained about their inclusion.

 

Thanks man! I appreciate the support. I know I'll love Hitman 2, because I already do - I was up late playing it last night? agreed 100% about the old levels having a different feel to them, and I like how it breaks down where your points are coming from. It also somehow looks.. sleeker? Smoother? It's hard to describe, but it definitely feels like a bump up in quality.

 

11 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

I think you've also nudged me in the direction of my next classic review, so thanks for that. I  think I'm going to cover Hitman 2: Silent Assassin through to Blood Money next. Been a while since I've covered sequential games.

 

I'm off to go and pour myself a lot of coffee - and get and play Afterparty.

 

Yuss!! Do it! Do it!

 

I would LOVE to hear your thoughts on those games - Silent Assassin for obvious reasons, but the rest as well seeing as I missed out on those. I'm about this man, yes!!

 

Also about more Afterparty, of course. But make sure you're getting your rest! Er, not to get all dad on you, haha?

[YaManSmevz]

 

10 hours ago, DrBloodmoney said:

I'd probably be considered an "Absolution Apologist", in the sense that I actually do think it's a game that is pretty good in a lot of ways  - but none of the ways in which it is good are things a good Hitman game should do.

 

Absolution is actually a pretty decent, interesting 3rd person stealth game - it has a fairly compelling narrative, looks good, has a pretty solid shooting system, and has a really interesting, fairly unique 'Southern Gothic' tone that is pretty difficult to nail in media (think the early parts of From Dusk till Dawn, or the desert sections of Natural Born Killers - all rattlesnakes, sweat, blood and diesel oil)....all of which is cool -   it just isn't a good Hitman game whatsoever.

 

EDIT - 

 

Oh, and I almost forgot @rjkclarke, Absolution commits the most grievous of errors, looking back - Jane Perry does a voice, but not Diana Burnwoods!  

It wasn't until the new trilogy that she took over that role, and turned Diana into the sexiest mistress in videogames 

 

(I think 'Jane Perry as Diana' is probably my version of your 'Keeley Hawes as Lara' - indispensable, inimitable and indisputable! )

 

That's the impression I got from reviews of Absolution. I feel like I missed out on yhe frustration of the series not getting it right, but didn't quite get the same feeling of satisfaction when it did that the fine people who patiently waited for all sixteen years did?

 

Dude I actually mistemembered Diana from Silent Assassin as being Jane Perry! I just assumed she'd been doing it since then, I'm surprised that it wasn't! Just goes to show, you're absolutely right - she's indispensable, and became as much quite quickly!

 

7 hours ago, KindaSabbath said:

No doubt. Rose tinted glasses and all. Exactly the reason that I've never replayed the master piece that is: Resident Evil Code Veronic X. 

 

This is why I'm so grateful for the new Hitman games - I know if I actually played Silent Assassin, I'd be mad disappointed.. but with the reboot, I can remember that game however I want, because the newer games will deliver?

[rjkclarke]

Okay so I feel as if I ought to apologise to both @Heather342 and @DrBloodmoney for being such a defensive little weirdo yesterday - when I was all like " NO I NEVER SAID I EVEN LIKED ABSOLUTION OR ANYTHING."

 

Not quite sure what came over me when I did that

 

Apologies to both of you - I guess I don't really like Absolution either if my immediate reaction was to deny most of my admittedly very small amount of good will towards it. But yes, sorry about that one - won't happen again - I'll go back in my box.

 

On 18/11/2021 at 7:46 PM, YaManSmevz said:

Thanks buddy! Much appreciated as always. I'm sorry to hear your sleeping cycle is off, though! I have a lot of experience with that myself, it can be absolute hell. What'd the doctor say in Fight Club, valerian root and exercise? Crap, you're not up all night making soap, are you??

 

 

Too little sleep is - well, It's not the best that's for sure...... I mean if my profile picture suddenly changes to Brad Pitt and then back to Solid Snake again periodically - then I think we ought to start being worried, but for now we're all good ?

 

On 18/11/2021 at 7:46 PM, YaManSmevz said:

....well, far be it from me to denounce kinky nuns.

 

Yo Sapienza was my shit. No map was lacking, to be clear, but Sapienza just blew me away, from its beauty to its gentle bustling quality to its versatility. I already know that the coming games will have maps to give it a run for its money, but I already know it will remain a favorite.

 

 

That is an important point actually - that none of the maps were actually lacking - I like all of them in Hitman (2016) for various different reasons. Sapienza is still my favourite map from that game, and not just because it gets used the most - but because it's genuinely structured brilliantly, and it's so memorable. Plus the actual main mission there is very good..... Putting Silvio in the wood chipper/garden waste thing is so disgustingly satisfying.

 

Hitman 2 has a brilliant set of maps too to be fair - again for a multitude of reasons.... You're in for a treat with that one.

 

On 18/11/2021 at 7:46 PM, YaManSmevz said:

I was joking about how awful that Timothy Olyphant movie was! Like I was in denial of its existence. As I was writing this I saw that a second one was made, which I was unaware of, but from what I can tell about it, the less known, the better!

 

I think that is best - that we all deny the existence of the Timothy the Elephant (Great name for a childrens book ?) version..... I suspect that version is better than the new one though.... The recent one they essentially turned 47 into slap-head Neo from the Matrix, but also recycled some of the plot points from Absolution - so it committed two major film sins at once. 

 

 

On 18/11/2021 at 7:46 PM, YaManSmevz said:

I thought the challenges were a brilliant touch. As if there wasn't enough content already, it's such a clever way to guide you to try new things. When I was getting to level 20 in Marrakesh I saw one to dump five bodies in a well, and as silly as it was I was having a good ol time

 

I never did that Marrakesh one for dumping the bodies in a well... Did you manage to do it? I always wanted to try it, because I couldn't really figure out how to do that without immediately alerting an army of guards. I guess that's half the fun though right. I ought to try it when I play HItman 3 actually, that'd be another excuse to attempt it.

 

I did one where you have to get loads of coins and throw them into a dudes bowl that I think was in Marrakesh, that was quite a fun little one to attempt.

 

On 18/11/2021 at 7:46 PM, YaManSmevz said:

Thanks man! I appreciate the support. I know I'll love Hitman 2, because I already do - I was up late playing it last night agreed 100% about the old levels having a different feel to them, and I like how it breaks down where your points are coming from. It also somehow looks.. sleeker? Smoother? It's hard to describe, but it definitely feels like a bump up in quality.

 

 

I did see you playing that when I woke up yesterday and booted up my PS4, before I realised I was probably too tired to make use of it..... I figured if it's 5.15Am for me, it's probably like midnight for him, and you were on for a good while after that - but I get it, that game hooks you in pretty much instantly.

 

Have at it man - and enjoy the experience - I pretty much enjoyed 99% of my time with Hitman 2 - the 1% I didn't was how long you had to wait for some of the challenges in the Sniper Maps, but I understand why they are like that - the actual pathing and A.I scripts for those maps is incredibly well done.

 

On 18/11/2021 at 7:46 PM, YaManSmevz said:

Yuss!! Do it! Do it!

 

I would LOVE to hear your thoughts on those games - Silent Assassin for obvious reasons, but the rest as well seeing as I missed out on those. I'm about this man, yes!!

 

Also about more Afterparty, of course. But make sure you're getting your rest! Er, not to get all dad on you, haha ?

 

I'll aim to get Silent Assassin done today - and then we'll go from there haha

 

I might try and finish at least my first playthrough of Afterparty today, I'm seriously slacking with that one.

 

 

 

 

 

Edited November 19, 2021 by rjkclarke

[Heather342]

2 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

Okay so I feel as if I ought to apologise to both @Heather342 and @DrBloodmoney for being such a defensive little weirdo yesterday - when I was all like " NO I NEVER SAID I EVEN LIKED ABSOLUTION OR ANYTHING."

 

Not quite sure what came over me when I did that

 

Apologies to both of you - I guess I don't really like Absolution either if my immediate reaction was to deny most of my admittedly very small amount of good will towards it. But yes, sorry about that one - won't happen again - I'll go back in my box.

 

Hey, nothing to apologise for, it's all good ? I was just throwing my opinions around again about why I didn't like Absolution. Wasn't asked for, I know, but didn't intend for the discussion to take a turn.

 

2 hours ago, rjkclarke said:

Putting Silvio in the wood chipper/garden waste thing is so disgustingly satisfying.

 

If you like that, there's a few kills in Hitman 3 that'll be right up your alley. Particularly in the Mendoza level ?

[rjkclarke]

3 hours ago, Heather342 said:

Hey, nothing to apologise for, it's all good I was just throwing my opinions around again about why I didn't like Absolution. Wasn't asked for, I know, but didn't intend for the discussion to take a turn.

 

Phew, that's good then. Those are completely understandable reasons to dislike Absolution too, ironically ones I agreed with, I just reacted like a dope.

 

You should absolutely continue to throw your opinions around too by the way. I'll make sure not to react like a complete nimrod next time. It's completely on me for acting like a tool.

 

4 hours ago, Heather342 said:

If you like that, there's a few kills in Hitman 3 that'll be right up your alley. Particularly in the Mendoza level ?

 

Must fight urge to purchase Hitman 3 haha!

 

I mean, I was impressed by the extreme nature of some of the stuff you could do in Hitman 2 as well - so I can imagine the third only takes that to even greater heights. I love the stuff you can do with the Hippo in Hitman 2 in Santa Fortuna - that's another disgustingly satisfying one right? 

[Heather342]

1 hour ago, rjkclarke said:

 I love the stuff you can do with the Hippo in Hitman 2 in Santa Fortuna - that's another disgustingly satisfying one right? 

A personal favourite of mine was setting up the train kill in Mumbai ?

[rjkclarke]

48 minutes ago, Heather342 said:

A personal favourite of mine was setting up the train kill in Mumbai

 

Ooooh good shout - especially that brutally satisfying cutscene you get. That just looks absolutely devastating. So many great ones in that second game.

 

One of my personal faves as far of any of the recent games  was the one you can do in Hokkaido in Hitman 1 (well and 2 and 3 I guess, ?)  it's really simple, but really well done, where you go into Soder's operating theatre in the classic Silent Assassin: Glove and Tie look - and it only works in that specific outfit. Just the sight of you gives him a massive heart attack. That was a great little hidden challenge I thought. Made 47 look absolutely badass.

 

Well just remembering those was enough to make me want to go and install Hitman 2 again - to have another play in those sandboxes. Might have to clear some room on my PS4! ?

[YaManSmevz]

Hundo #10: Red Dead Revolver

 

Hidden in his coat is a red right hand

 

While Manhunt was busying itself with keeping Rockstar's controversy game on point, a mere two weeks later Red Dead Revolver quietly came out of the woodwork to offer up something a bit different. Save for maybe the Wild Arms series, a game of this scope set in the Old West wasn't really a thing at the time - it was all quiet on the Western front, as it were.

 

*stop here for groans*

 

Apologies to Erich Maria Remarque!

 

While full disclosure, i did not play this when it came out, and my recent experience with it was the first, I do remember a lot of us bein like "A Western? Okay Rockstar, let's see where you're goin with this.."

 

Red Dead Revolver started life under Capcom in 2000 with the hopes of being a spiritual successor to 80s arcade games set in the Old West, particularly the company's own Gun Smoke. Looking back, it seems like this project being acquired by a publisher known for geeking out over movies was the perfect fit. Right from the jump, this thing oozes not just Spaghetti Western vibes, but emanates those old cowboy video games as well.

 

The title screen is dope - it recreates the intro of a cheesy old Western perfectly, complete with scratches in the film and a grainy, dated look. This alternates with a demo mode, which is a call back to those idle arcade screens just waiting for some dumb kid like me to run up and drop every last quarter. Similarly, when you die it has that old school countdown screen asking if you want to continue, which I thought was also a nice touch.

 

The soundtrack is outstanding too - the tracks are all from actual Spaghetti Western films, by composers like Ennio Morricone, Nino Rota, and... um.. others! I'll be real, those were the only two names I recognized when I looked it up?

 

It's lovingly put together, and it feels very authentic, but... don't let that excite you too much, cuz it doesn't always quite work!

 

For instance, the duel feature is cool, and implemented in such a bad ass, cinegraphic way. The tense music kicks in, you're starin each other down, and you notice little things about your opponent - maybe a shaky hand tells you they're nervous, or a smirk will let you know that you'd better be on your shit cuz this fool will smoke you like nothin. Then the screen gives a subtle hint, and it's time to draw.

 

And that's all great, in fact it blew me away.. the first time. After that though, you've got at least ten more of these to go, with the final four being quite difficult, and it doesn't take long for the drawn out nature of the duels to get old!

 

Also, the use of the era's slang felt a bit overboard at times - not because it was used too much, but because its delivery could border on cringe worthy at times. At one point in the beginning, this dude's like "such a YELLA BELLY!" and everybody around him is losing their minds like he just won a rap battle with the craziest line they ever heard, and you're just starin at the screen like "You corny ass."

 

This could just be my own ignorance, though. One time, a buddy of mine shouted out a curse word in Spanish pretty loudly and I don't think he knew just how inflammatory what he said was, so I'm trying to shush him but I'm too busy giggling to be very convincing, and sadly the lesson went unlearned. Maybe that's the case here, and John Smith 1882 is turning in his grave at my insensitivity with the term!

 

As for the voice acting, this is really all you need to know.

 

The gameplay is okay. It's better than Manhunt, but still not especially smooth. Jumping feels kinda janky, and to bring up the voice actors again, they really went to town on these parts. During a bounty mission, you have to make it through a level unseen. So you start out, throw knives at two patrolling enemies, and you hear their quiet death rattles fading into the night. Then you stealthily creep across a few rocks, and then make a quick leap, and your character goes "HUH!! HAH!! HYYUUHHH!!" It fucked with the immersion just a tad!

 

I dug the Redeye feature, which is basically this game's version of bullet time. It can be a godsend because the enemies run around like they're on fire and Yakety Sax is playing, plus the aim is mad inconsistent. Sometimes a clean head shot will miss, or other times I'll think I missed, or I'll hit an enemy's foot or something, but his head will blow off. Maybe they were trying to illustrate the spottiness in gun accuracy from the time? Given the attention to detail in presentation across the board, it seems unfair of me to just assume it's poor design. However, much like the blinding sun in some GTA games, it isn't unfair of me to not like it! 

 

The story is passable. The main character, Red (a dead ringer for the Man with No Name, incidentally), sees his parents get killed as a kid, and in his travels ends up stumbling upon those responsible. For the first half of the game he's just bringing in bounties, then after that the story kicks into high gear.

 

I point out that he's the main character because you get to play as a few different people, which I thought was cool. They each have their little screens that pop up before the mission to let you know who you'll be playing as, and each has its own unique color design. Aside from Red, i had the most fun using Jack Swift (Jack Nasty!) and Shadow Wolf.

 

I will say, I'm glad I not only played this game, but did so before the others in the franchise (barring maybe a half hour of RDR1 on the 360). It's not a great game, but it's certainly a good one, and the dedication to the Western theme is in the very least commendable. There were heaps of potential here, and while it's not perfect, it definitely had the makings of something special, as the later entries proved. Not Rockstar's best, but I wouldn't call it a misstep at all. I'd recommend it to anybody curious, but also caution you to curb your expectations.

 

THAT Trophy: Out for Blood

 

For the most part, the tasks in Bounty Hunter mode were pretty simple, but a few of them were a bit much. I touched on the one earlier where you need to sneak through an entire level, and there really isn't a stealth system to speak of so it's quite easy to get discovered. You really want to complete this mode though, because you get cheats that are invaluable when it comes to beating Very Hard mode (I would undoubtedly still be grinding away at it if not for those!)

 

Sorry about this one, I feel it's kinda all over the place. I thought writing about it immediately after completing it would make it easier, but it almost feels like I did the opposite! Anyway, with this one done, the Rockstar reviews can continue?

Edited April 12, 2022 by YaManSmevz

[YaManSmevz]

On 11/19/2021 at 6:00 AM, rjkclarke said:

I think that is best - that we all deny the existence of the Timothy the Elephant (Great name for a childrens book ) version..... I suspect that version is better than the new one though.... The recent one they essentially turned 47 into slap-head Neo from the Matrix, but also recycled some of the plot points from Absolution - so it committed two major film sins at once. 

 

 

 

I never did that Marrakesh one for dumping the bodies in a well... Did you manage to do it? I always wanted to try it, because I couldn't really figure out how to do that without immediately alerting an army of guards. I guess that's half the fun though right. I ought to try it when I play HItman 3 actually, that'd be another excuse to attempt it.

 

I did one where you have to get loads of coins and throw them into a dudes bowl that I think was in Marrakesh, that was quite a fun little one to attempt.

 

 

I did see you playing that when I woke up yesterday and booted up my PS4, before I realised I was probably too tired to make use of it..... I figured if it's 5.15Am for me, it's probably like midnight for him, and you were on for a good while after that - but I get it, that game hooks you in pretty much instantly.

 

Have at it man - and enjoy the experience - I pretty much enjoyed 99% of my time with Hitman 2 - the 1% I didn't was how long you had to wait for some of the challenges in the Sniper Maps, but I understand why they are like that - the actual pathing and A.I scripts for those maps is incredibly well done.

 

I never responded to this, how rude of me!

 

That movie sounds atrocious, and I'm glad I hadn't even heard of it until now. The only way that could be worse is if they cast William Mapother as Agent 47!

 

I actually did dump five bodies down the well! I just went headshot, hide behind well, and repeat until people stopped coming. At that point, as I'm sure you can imagine, I had more than enough bodies available to dump for the challenge?

 

Oh yeah, I'm always up late. If you ever meet a bartender who says they aren't a night owl, that isn't a bartender, it's 47 and you need to get out of there immediately.

 

Thanks for the reminder! I need to get crackin on those Sniper challenges...

[Heather342]

Hey @YaManSmevz, just saw in the PlayStation end of year sale that Alien Isolation has 80% off and is currently £5.99 for the base game or £9.99 with the DLC included. Not sure what that is in $, but I believe this is the price range you were looking for ?

[YaManSmevz]

Monthly Update with Ya Man Smevz

November 2021

 

November's newest narcissistic notifications are here!

 

On the surface, my progress doesn't look terribly impressive, because in addition to yet another busy month, I impulsively started playing a new game with well over 100 trophies. Real quick, let's get the stats out of the way:

 

80.44% overall completion

572 unearned trophies

3.15 trophies per day

41 platinums

Level 311

 

Last month I aimed to get below 500 unearned trophies and pop a minimum of four platinums, neither of which happened. Also, I only completed three out of five games on the hitlist, with two of them going untouched. Whaddayagonnado. This month, I once again completed five games, but this time with three platinums. More importantly though, I had a lot of fun with this batch of games! 

 

Game of the Month

 

Yo, this was surprisingly tough! We kick off November with the spectacular Hotline Miami. Then out of nowhere, start playing MLB The Show '19 again and have a blast, playing (get this) largely without any regard for trophies at all, just remembering how fucking fun it is - plus it joins the rare ranks of games the wife likes to watch me play! We continue chipping away at the ungodly entertaining Tony Hawk's Pro Skater, a stupendous time machine that gives me endless joy even though the idea of actually completing it still gives me anxiety. Finally, we end the month high on (more) nostalgia courtesy of GTA: San Andreas, one of my favorite games of all time.

 

However, it's a two horse race here.

 

The Witness continues to blow my damn mind. Poor @GonzoWARgasm had to deal with the brunt of my frustration with The Challenge, but besting that has set me off on a journey that finds me seeing even more dots and lines all over the place. Can't wait to write about it, but I don't think it would be the right thing to do until I find the real ending - the actual end initially felt like a slap in the face, but quickly switched to feeling like the game telling me "that's not it bro, keep digging." So keep digging I shall.

 

Speaking of seeing things, I couldn't help noticing when I -

 

- wrote my 347th post.

- completed my 47th game.

- got my 47th trophy (and achieved level 47) on Hitman 2.

 

Hitman was originally on this shortlist, but its sequel took over without issue (for obvious reasons). Hawke's Bay gave me such a thrill after re-treading the original game's missions, but then I felt the need to play them again so that I could experience the story in the correct order, and getting trophies I've already gotten has never felt like such a treat. Just little additions like blending into crowds, GRASS, and the triumphant return of briefcases have made it feel like a brand new game. I am hooked, and while I am stoked to start the new missions, playing the old ones again is anything but a chore.

 

It's absolutely razor thin, but I gotta give it to Hitman 2!

 

We're Goin Streaking?

 

Sadly, no. The last trophy streak ended at 46 days, but that was a record for me so ain't nobody mad. We'll see where the current one goes!

 

Rating the Month

 

I didn't hit either of my goals, but I got a lot done. I pitched a no-hitter, completed a certain challenge, and re-established that I am in fact the mayor of Sapienza. Trophies per day went up, and I not only gained five levels but made it into the 80% completion club. Not to mention the great quality of games played - Wolf Among Us and Red Dead Revolver were omitted not because they weren't perfectly fine games, but just cuz there was already so much good shit to talk about!

 

This might be too generous, but I'm gonna give November a rating of four out of five Silent Assassins!

 

December Goals

 

1. Lower unearned trophies below 500.

2. Maintain 80% completion.

3. Minimum of three platinums.

 

Gaming Hitlist

 

My profile is relatively young, two years old at the end of this month, and as such I've yet to take two years or more to finish a game, a trend I'd really like to continue. Looking at the earliest pages of my trophy log, I see there are three games I started in January of 2020, which are therefore automatically being added:

 

Batman: Arkham Asylum - All I've got left are the combat challenges and beating the game on hard. The latter doesn't intimidate me, but I gotta be real witcha, I never truly got the hang of those freeflow challenges. That's all that stands between me and that sweet, platinum goodness.

 

EA Sports UFC 3 - This guy may be my backlog's longest tenured pain in the ass! Stuck on the Legendary difficulty, the prime reason being that when you lose, there is no option to go back to a previous save - and you can only afford to lose a couple of times, so every loss means you've got to exit the game and restart, which gives trying again a whole new level of annoyance! Truth be told though, I haven't given it the same dedication I've given any other difficult challenge, so it's silly to act as though it's insurmountable. Been wanting to be done with this one for a long time.

 

Dynasty Warriors 8 Empires - I've got a soft spot for this franchise, what can I say. Stopped working on this one a while back. The lifestyles/titles grew tiresome, and the dumb fun this game is famous for diminishes a bit in the face of grindy trophies. Mostly though, over time I've finally started losing interest in these games altogether, for reasons I'll get into once I review this proper.

 

Yakuza 0 and Final Fantasy IX are still on here, if only because I need to get back on them, and I'm aiming to finish San Andreas and Hitman 2 by the month's end.

 

Went a little overlong with this one, I do apologize! Anyway, on to December!

[Heather342]

@YaManSmevz my sniper rifle is ready to assist you for Hitman 2 ?

[Platinum_Vice]

4 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

 

Game of the Month

 

The Witness continues to blow my damn mind. Poor @GonzoWARgasm had to deal with the brunt of my frustration with The Challenge, but besting that has set me off on a journey that finds me seeing even more dots and lines all over the place. Can't wait to write about it, but I don't think it would be the right thing to do until I find the real ending - the actual end initially felt like a slap in the face, but quickly switched to feeling like the game telling me "that's not it bro, keep digging." So keep digging I shall.

 

 

 

How is the postgame treating you? 

 

4 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

 

Rating the Month

 

I didn't hit either of my goals, but I got a lot done. I pitched a no-hitter, completed a certain challenge, and re-established that I am in fact the mayor of Sapienza. Trophies per day went up, and I not only gained five levels but made it into the 80% completion club. Not to mention the great quality of games played - Wolf Among Us and Red Dead Revolver were omitted not because they weren't perfectly fine games, but just cuz there was already so much good shit to talk about!

 

Bro this is a big month!! Good for you!

 

4 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

 

Gaming Hitlist

 

My profile is relatively young, two years old at the end of this month, and as such I've yet to take two years or more to finish a game, a trend I'd really like to continue. Looking at the earliest pages of my trophy log, I see there are three games I started in January of 2020, which are therefore automatically being added

 

Love this. Excited to hear your thoughts on Arkham Asylum after obtaining the platinum (I find that the mastery of combat systems like this as required for trophies greatly improves the overall enjoyability, as opposed to mashing X on lower difficulties).

[YaManSmevz]

7 hours ago, Heather342 said:

@YaManSmevz my sniper rifle is ready to assist you for Hitman 2

 

I'll be hittin you up soon? good lookin out! And speakin of good lookin out, thanks for the tip, cuz I finally bought Alien Isolation! Hopefully I won't wake my wife up when I'm playing it in the middle of the night?

 

4 hours ago, GonzoWARgasm said:

How is the postgame treating you? 

 

Yo it's somethin else. I haven't played much since I was last talking to you about it, but I'm ready for another round. There's a few more I found but can't get the angle right, need to get back to those. You were right, it's not quite as intimidating as I thought it would be. I've got a weird dichotomy going of wanting to take my time (it's served me well thus far) but hurrying up so I can write about it already!

 

4 hours ago, GonzoWARgasm said:

Bro this is a big month!! Good for you!

 

 

Love this. Excited to hear your thoughts on Arkham Asylum after obtaining the platinum (I find that the mastery of combat systems like this as required for trophies greatly improves the overall enjoyability, as opposed to mashing X on lower difficulties).

 

Thanks, man! And agreed 100% - that's what elevates it above just mindless fun.

 

 

The thing I'm most hype for is definitely when the combat system really clicks with me - it's already so fun as it is! I think I'll take up the good doctor's advice and slap on Parappa the Rapper for a bit before diving back in?

[YaManSmevz]

Hundo #1: The Warriors

 

Crews be actin like they gangs anyway/Be like "Warriors, come out and play-eee-yay"

 

I love The Warriors.

 

Loved the movie. Loved the book (yikes though.. that shit be dark). And spoilers be damned, I loved the game.

 

Reviews of games like this generally start off with the whole "movie-based games generally aren't good, but.." intro, giving it a back-handed compliment it doesn't need. Like telling a young person that they're pretty bright for their age, or somebody with a thick accent that you can't get over how good their English is. In fact, let's just throw this paragraph out altogether.

 

WOOOOOSH!!

 

I first saw this game on a store shelf with no prior knowledge of it, and the cover basically slapped me across the face twice - first with the open palm over seeing that there was a Warriors game on the PS2 that I somehow hadn't heard about, and then quickly again with the backhand when I noticed that Rockstar logo in the bottom corner.

 

In no uncertain terms, this was designed by people who love the movie as much as I do, if not more. Right away, you can see how faithful this thing is trying to be to its source material. The intro is a frame for frame remake of the movie's opening, and the glorious Coney Island ferris wheel dominates the title screen with that same music and grimy feel, which carries on all throughout the game. That bleak, dingy feel of late 70s New York City is almost oppressively well preserved, from the run-down look to the way NPCs live in it, jaded and devoid of hope.

 

As for the voice work, they saw to it that this would have as many of the original film's actors as possible, and the replacements for those unavailable were about as close as we were gonna get - it also served to assure that the voice acting misfires from Red Dead Revolver were a lone hiccup. And even though it very much doesn’t have to be, the music is an utter powerhouse that could carry the atmosphere alone. Steve Donohoe did an excellent job of taking cues from film composer Barry de Vorzon. Warped bass, eerie synths, and spare guitars create this paranoid environment where it always feels like something bad is about to happen.

 

Much in the same way, the writers took the film's script and managed to not only add an abundance of new material to it, but did so in an organic and thoughtful manner. They asked, and answered, questions I personally never thought of - why were the Saracens and the Jones Street Boys beefin? How did the idea for this meeting come about? Why did the Orphans look like such sad little bitches? Where did the Warriors come from, and how did the members we know come to join?

 

Rockstar does a brilliant thing here, and start the game three months before the events of the film. This gives us time to see the dynamic of our (anti-)heroes, and develop them far beyond what they were given before. Take Rembrandt for instance; clearly the least physical of the bunch in the movie, and always with a can of spray paint, and they build his character marvelously around those two traits. They develop Cleon into the leader the gang reveres him as in the film, and really the whole gang starts to feel like people we're getting to know.

 

We get so involved in this world - we defend our turf from invading gangs, we vanquish rivals, we get into violent misadventures, we listen to the movie's DJ on the radio together like a ghetto ass version of Roosevelt's fireside chats. As a bonus, we even get flashback levels that show us how each member joined the Warriors! By the time we finally get to that fateful meeting, and the events we already know begin to transpire, we're even more invested in what happens to these guys than we were before! Now that's a feat.

 

It isn't just our Warriors who get the fleshing out treatment, either. Many of the gangs here are brought to life, complete with their own gimmick, all because they appeared in passing during the movie's first sequence! Like "shit, you remember those weirdos with the mime makeup? Let's make a few levels with those guys." We get a window into some of the gangs we've seen before as well, like the plight of the aforementioned Orphans, discussions of the Riff's grandiose plans, or just how unhinged the Rogues really are.

 

A game also based on a famous 70s movie, The Godfather, came out a year later with the similar premise of adding on to a classic film. Now, I loved that game, make no mistake. But where that added story was shoehorned, rushed, and generally a plain Jane affair, here we have something faithful to the source material but bold enough to expand on the original story told, and somehow creating something new and exciting in the process. I really just can't stress enough how masterfully this was put together!

 

Luckily, actually playing the game is a lot of fun too! I hadn't paid the beat 'em up genre much mind since the SNES days, so I couldn't speak on whether this was something new or unique or anything, but I loved that style with 3D presentation. Also, it has the benefit of coming a year after Manhunt and San Andreas - targeting continues to improve, and stealth, while almost comically limited, does have a system in place.

 

The gang controls flirted with in Vice City and improved upon in San Andreas are ramped up considerably here. You have multiple options to command your crew with, be it to follow you, run and hide, or just start fuckin shit up. Splitting up is crucial when the cops arrive because even if you get busted, so long as one of your soldiers are out there, there's a chance that they can come and save you.

 

Multi-player is an absolute must if you have someone for couch co-op. The first time I played this was with my sister, and it was a joke how much fun we were having. We hit our first snag with that Hi-Hats level where you're getting chased across the rooftops (yeah, shitty camera angles will rear their ugly head often in this game. '05 though, whaddayagonnado) and we were laughing so hard every time one of us died that neither of us particularly cared.

 

Rockstar definitely followed up San Andreas proper with this one. They came through with another labor of love here, and in the unlikely event that you enjoyed the film but haven't played the game (or even more enviable yet- are unfamiliar with both!) then I'm afraid it's my responsibility to inform you that you've been missing out.

 

 

THAT Trophy: Coin-Op

 

So there's this great bonus feature that basically re-works the entire game as an old school arcade beat 'em up, right down to the kidnapped girlfriend, the ostentatious bosses, and the basic enemies' life bars complete with their misspelled tough guy names. It's a riot, man.

 

Only reason it's here is because it can take a while, and I resorted to using the infinite credits cheat towards the end because as fun as it was, I really wasn't down for a second go-around immediately after!

 

Alright, another Rockstar review is in the books! I know I skipped San Andreas, but I'm in the middle of playing through it again. As usual, thanks for reading all my rambling?

Edited November 10, 2022 by YaManSmevz

[YaManSmevz]

Platinum #4: Bully

 

I hope you know that this will go down on your permanent record

 

Released in the dying days of the sixth generation, Bully (or Canis Canem Edit outside of the states) serves as a triumphant exclamation point on Rockstar's blistering PS2 run, and in my eyes is as much a great game as it is a victory lap for the publisher. Bully followed a five year period including three GTAs, two Max Paynes, two Midnight Clubs, Manhunt, Red Dead Revolver, and The Warriors, and it has a piece (or in the very least a lesson learned) from all of them.

 

When this first came out, I remember (like many) wondering if it was going to merely be a teenaged GTA. It reminded me of the (excellent) film Brick from the previous year, which was, in fact, a teenaged take on a more adult concept, but it didn't take much actual playing time to see what oversimplified nonsense that was where Bully was concerned.

 

There's a great universality to Bully in how it tackles the teen experience. Class, social drama, hobbies, and just generally seeking mischief are handled in such a way that it gives a sense of authenticity to the story without feeling like a maudlin attempt to overdose the players on nostalgia. The game really takes off once the town of Bullworth becomes fully available to explore, getting to see both what your classmates do in their free time and the townspeople going about their day, which gives the small town a great living, breathing feel. This also really helps a lot towards giving you that feeling of being the new kid in a new town (there's the new kid, beat him down!).

 

The story is fun and engaging, broken up neatly into themed chapters, based on which of the cliques you'll be confronting, as well as where you're at in the school year, with seasons being used to marvelous immersive effect. It moves a bit slowly at first, as since you are a student, you have to spend a large chunk of your time in class. These are a great excuse for the game to flex not only its mini-game prowess, but the light RPG elements inherited from San Andreas. Finishing the classes earns you skills and weapons that come in handy as the game progresses, and the games are largely pretty fun, with the word game for English class being a personal favorite.

 

The characters hit that sweet spot where they're not super deep, but aren't exactly shallow either. Jimmy is a great protagonist, with fun wisecracks and an attitude that does border on eye rolling at times, but for the most part manages to stay relatable. There aren't any slouches in the cast at all really - main antagonist Gary is delightfully sociopathic, while more one note characters like the drunken Mr. Galloway, or slovenly lunch lady Edna never failed to get a laugh out of me. Even after the several playthroughs I've done!

 

The gameplay is the smoothest yet that we'd seen from Rockstar - the brawling from The Warriors and customization of San Andreas in particular are cleaned up and implemented superbly. Probably the lone con to this aspect of the game is that the camera angles still aren't quite where they should be, but this is where that critique starts to feel nitpicky, as there is a clear improvement here from the last few games.

 

Touching on the mischief again, there are so many dumb, fun things you can do. Long before there was a trophy for it, every night before I went to bed I'd pull the fire alarm, just because I thought it was funny to collapse into bed while everybody ran crazily in the hall. I always imagined at least a few of the guys in the dorm would hear the alarm going off and just think "oh, Jimmy's home."

 

Beyond giving wedgies or swirlies, dropping marbles, throwing stink bombs or even latching onto a car on your skateboard like you're Marty McFly, there is a litany of things to do outside of the game's story itself. Boxing, go-karts, bicycle races, carnival games, video games, mowing lawn, shoveling snow, making deliveries, taking yearbook pictures, learning fighting moves from a hobo, destroying lawn gnomes, playing with soccer balls, basketballs, dodge balls, baseballs, slingshots... there's a lot! The countless mini-games are as fun as they are varied, and a prime example of the Jack of All Trades, Master of None trope not necessarily being a bad thing!

 

Across the board everything is in the very least above average, but one point where Bully absolutely excels is its audio. The voice work is solid, with not a weak performance in the bunch, but this is primarily a result of Shawn Lee's outstanding score. Funky bass, bluesy guitars, and that ever-present glockenspiel (I'm fairly certain that's what it is at least) with the occasional 80s worshiping synths give the game such a playful, light hearted atmosphere that it just feels lovable from the jump. To this day, I hear anything off of this soundtrack and it just brings a smile to my face. It's also dynamic as hell - it's a more common thing now, but the music gains and drops layers based on whether you're on foot or not, if conflict arises, even when you start get tired in the later hours.

 

A shame that Rockstar kinda sorta did him dirty with the GTA IV theme?

 

Bully feels like the culmination of everything Rockstar did right in the preceding half decade, and tackled yet another new type of story with flying colors. Looking at where they were here, I can't help but look at the fat, lazy publisher they've become, gouging players with lackluster quality control, forgetting that they once pushed themselves to their creative limits with each new release.... it's depressing, man.

 

Rockstar, man... you used to be cool.

 

THAT Trophy: N/A

 

That's right, this is that rare game where try as I might, I couldn't come up with a trophy that gave me more trouble than the rest. Everything was fun, and uh... yeah, that's that on that.

Edited November 10, 2022 by YaManSmevz

[DrBloodmoney]

38 minutes ago, YaManSmevz said:

Platinum #4: Bully

 

I hope you know that this will go down on your permanent record

 

Oh Yeah? 

Well don't get so distressed....

...did I happen to mention that I'm impressed?

?

 

Quote

 

Released in the dying days of the sixth generation, Bully (or Canis Canem Edit outside of the states) serves as a triumphant exclamation point on Rockstar's blistering PS2 run, and in my eyes is as much a great game as it is a victory lap for the publisher. Bully followed a five year period including three GTAs, two Max Paynes, two Midnight Clubs, Manhunt, Red Dead Revolver, and The Warriors, and it has a piece (or in the very least a lesson learned) from all of them.

 

When this first came out, I remember (like many) wondering if it was going to merely be a teenaged GTA. It reminded me of the (excellent) film Brick from the previous year, which was, in fact, a teenaged take on a more adult concept, but it didn't take much actual playing time to see what oversimplified nonsense that was where Bully was concerned.

 

Man I remember that furore about "GtA iN a sChOoL!!1!" driven by the Daily Mail reading gammons back then - the shite that led to me having to learn what Canis Canid Edit meant!

 

It was such a load of tosh - like the Brass Eye Paedo-geddon episode uproar before it - entirely driven by people who not only didn't actually seek out or experience the product, but didn't even have an understanding of the medium it was playing in, had no sense of humour, and for the most part, were either disingenuously playing to a right-wing gallery, or so stupid they couldn't find a map with a fucking map.

 

ps. I loved Brick too! What a flick!

 

Quote

There's a great universality to Bully in how it tackles the teen experience. Class, social drama, hobbies, and just generally seeking mischief are handled in such a way that it gives a sense of authenticity to the story without feeling like a maudlin attempt to overdose the players on nostalgia. The game really takes off once the town of Bullworth becomes fully available to explore, getting to see both what your classmates do in their free time and the townspeople going about their day, which gives the small town a great living, breathing feel. This also really helps a lot towards giving you that feeling of being the new kid in a new town (there's the new kid, beat him down!).

 

The story is fun and engaging, broken up neatly into themed chapters, based on which of the cliques you'll be confronting, as well as where you're at in the school year, with seasons being used to marvelous immersive effect. It moves a bit slowly at first, as since you are a student, you have to spend a large chunk of your time in class. These are a great excuse for the game to flex not only its mini-game prowess, but the light RPG elements inherited from San Andreas. Finishing the classes earns you skills and weapons that come in handy as the game progresses, and the games are largely pretty fun, with the word game for English class being a personal favorite.

 

The characters hit that sweet spot where they're not super deep, but aren't exactly shallow either. Jimmy is a great protagonist, with fun wisecracks and an attitude that does border on eye rolling at times, but for the most part manages to stay relatable. There aren't any slouches in the cast at all really - main antagonist Gary is delightfully sociopathic, while more one note characters like the drunken Mr. Galloway, or slovenly lunch lady Edna never failed to get a laugh out of me. Even after the several playthroughs I've done!

 

I loved this stuff - the tone they hit in Bully is so pitch-perfect, like some sort of unholy amalgam of Revenge of the Nerds and Shameless!

They somehow manage to hit every cliche character of teem movie, but give them just enough of a slant as to make them interesting every time, and feel part of this world!

 

 

Quote

The gameplay is the smoothest yet that we'd seen from Rockstar - the brawling from The Warriors and customization of San Andreas in particular are cleaned up and implemented superbly. Probably the lone con to this aspect of the game is that the camera angles still aren't quite where they should be, but this is where that critique starts to feel nitpicky, as there is a clear improvement here from the last few games.

 

Touching on the mischief again, there are so many dumb, fun things you can do. Long before there was a trophy for it, every night before I went to bed I'd pull the fire alarm, just because I thought it was funny to collapse into bed while everybody ran crazily in the hall. I always imagined at least a few of the guys in the dorm would hear the alarm going off and just think "oh, Jimmy's home."

 

Beyond giving wedgies or swirlies, dropping marbles, throwing stink bombs or even latching onto a car on your skateboard like you're Marty McFly, there is a litany of things to do outside of the game's story itself. Boxing, go-karts, bicycle races, carnival games, video games, mowing lawn, shoveling snow, making deliveries, taking yearbook pictures, learning fighting moves from a hobo, destroying lawn gnomes, playing with soccer balls, basketballs, dodge balls, baseballs, slingshots... there's a lot! The countless mini-games are as fun as they are varied, and a prime example of the Jack of All Trades, Master of None trope not necessarily being a bad thing!

 

I remember loving so much about the way the game played at the time of release, though I must admit, when I played the remaster, time hadn't been kind to those controls and mechanics. I still had a great time, but I did wonder whether my nostalgia was helping or hurting...

...would I be able to see past the rough mechanics, if I didn't have the baked-in nostalgia to rose-tint my glasses, or is the fact that I remember it so fondly actually making it feel rougher when faced with the reality in a modern context? 

 

It's the main reason I really wish Rockstar would do a new Bully, more than GTA or RDR, I would be first in line. 

I really do think Bully is probably the best game Rockstar ever made - no.2 is the Warriors, and no.3 would be Red Dead Redemption. It's actually gizzard to think that a game I love as much as San Andreas isn't even in that top 3 ?

 

 

Quote

Across the board everything is in the very least above average, but one point where Bully absolutely excels is its audio. The voice work is solid, with not a weak performance in the bunch, but this is primarily a result of Shawn Lee's outstanding score. Funky bass, bluesy guitars, and that ever-present glockenspiel (I'm fairly certain that's what it is at least) with the occasional 80s worshiping synths give the game such a playful, light hearted atmosphere that it just feels lovable from the jump. To this day, I hear anything off of this soundtrack and it just brings a smile to my face. It's also dynamic as hell - it's a more common thing now, but the music gains and drops layers based on whether you're on foot or not, if conflict arises, even when you start get tired in the later hours.

 

A shame that Rockstar kinda sorta did him dirty with the GTA IV theme

 

Bully feels like the culmination of everything Rockstar did right in the preceding half decade, and tackled yet another new type of story with flying colors. Looking at where they were here, I can't help but look at the fat, lazy publisher they've become, gouging players with lackluster quality control, forgetting that they once pushed themselves to their creative limits with each new release.... it's depressing, man.

 

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Rockstar, man... you used to be cool.

 

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Great write up man!

 

Edited December 9, 2021 by DrBloodmoney

[YaManSmevz]

39 minutes ago, DrBloodmoney said:

 

Oh Yeah? 

Well don't get so distressed....

...did I happen to mention that I'm impressed?

 

??

 

For real though, that first album was sooo good!!

 

42 minutes ago, DrBloodmoney said:

Man I remember that furore about "GtA iN a sChOoL!!1!" driven by the Daily Mail reading gammons back then - the shite that led to me having to learn what Canis Canid Edit meant!

 

It was such a load of tosh - like the Brass Eye Paedo-geddon episode uproar before it - entirely driven by people who not only didn't actually seek out or experience the product, but didn't even have an understanding of the medium it was playing in, had no sense of humour, and for the most part, were either disingenuously playing to a right-wing gallery, or so stupid they couldn't find a map with a fucking map.

 

I think it was an easy assumption that was immediately thrown out the window once you actually, y'know played the game! That's part of why I didn't bother talking about the controversy this game courted... those people clearly never bothered to play it either! Someone legit called this game a "Columbine simulator." Like you dumb motherfucker, he's using a damn slingshot! This isn't Dylan Klebold, he's at worst a post-pubescent Dennis the Menace!

 

48 minutes ago, DrBloodmoney said:

I loved this stuff - the tone they hit in Bully is so pitch-perfect, like some sort of unholy amalgam of Revenge of the Nerds and Shameless!

They somehow manage to hit every cliche character of teem movie, but give them just enough of a slant as to make them interesting every time, and feel part of this world!

 

Agreed! They nailed the whole coming of age thing, with just the right amount of satire. Not a single thing felt overdone or disingenuous, a very hard thing to do with ANY medium!

 

51 minutes ago, DrBloodmoney said:

 

I remember loving so much about the way the game played at the time of release, though I must admit, when I played the remaster, time hadn't been kind to those controls and mechanics. I still had a great time, but I did wonder whether my nostalgia was helping or hurting...

...would I be able to see past the rough mechanics, if I didn't have the baked-in nostalgia to rose-tint my glasses, or is the fact that I remember it so fondly actually making it feel rougher when faced with the reality in a modern context? 

 

It's the main reason I really wish Rockstar would do a new Bully, more than GTA or RDR, I would be first in line. 

I really do think Bully is probably the best game Rockstar ever made - no.2 is the Warriors, and no.3 would be Red Dead Redemption. It's actually gizzard to think that a game I love as much as San Andreas isn't even in that top 3

 

I think I've played it enough over the years that I didn't notice the controls being rough - multiple times on the PS2, then again on the 360, and it was one of the first games I got deep into on my PS4. If I tried it again now though, who knows... I might have a similar experience!

 

My guess would be the memories making you think it was smoother than it actually was - I'm experiencing that with San Andreas now, I remembered the camera angles handling so much better, and playing it now I'm like "wait, no... it wasn't like this!! WHAT IS THIS TREACHERY!!"

 

Part of me is still on board with a Bully remaster, or Bully 2, but with the state Rockstar is in these days, I just wouldn't trust it?

 

Even with the rude awakening I've gotten with SA, I still gotta go San Andreas, Bully, then Warriors, all of which with a pretty slim margin.

 

However, in all fairness I still have Red Dead Redemption in my backlog?

[DrBloodmoney]

9 minutes ago, YaManSmevz said:

 

 

For real though, that first album was sooo good!!

 

Soundtrack to my entire school experience right there! 

 

9 minutes ago, YaManSmevz said:

 

I think it was an easy assumption that was immediately thrown out the window once you actually, y'know played the game! That's part of why I didn't bother talking about the controversy this game courted... those people clearly never bothered to play it either! Someone legit called this game a "Columbine simulator." Like you dumb motherfucker, he's using a damn slingshot! This isn't Dylan Klebold, he's at worst a post-pubescent Dennis the Menace!

 

If I recall correctly, the right wing press were still reeling from having been stung already - there was a fake vidogame that one of the magazines has done a "preview" of for April Fools, with 'realistic' graphics, where you just stalked and killed innocent people in suburbia (basically, that shitty PC game Hatred, but First-Person, fake, and obviously a goof) that the Daily Mail had thought was real, and had written a slew of "Oh, God, think of the Children!!1!" articles about before they got made to look like tits - so they were desperate for anything real to go after.

 

(II wish I could remember the name of the fake game - I want to say "Slayer"? but I think I have that wrong, because I can't find it with Google! - or the mag that ran the joke (it was a short-lived attempt at combining FHM with videogames, so basically games-n-boobs, and was pretty shit.)

 

9 minutes ago, YaManSmevz said:

 

Agreed! They nailed the whole coming of age thing, with just the right amount of satire. Not a single thing felt overdone or disingenuous, a very hard thing to do with ANY medium!

 

 

I think I've played it enough over the years that I didn't notice the controls being rough - multiple times on the PS2, then again on the 360, and it was one of the first games I got deep into on my PS4. If I tried it again now though, who knows... I might have a similar experience!

 

My guess would be the memories making you think it was smoother than it actually was - I'm experiencing that with San Andreas now, I remembered the camera angles handling so much better, and playing it now I'm like "wait, no... it wasn't like this!! WHAT IS THIS TREACHERY!!"

 

Part of me is still on board with a Bully remaster, or Bully 2, but with the state Rockstar is in these days, I just wouldn't trust it

 

That might be true - to be honest, at this point, I'd probably like it better if they gave that IP to someone who makes narrative games but gameplay-forward-style - a Monolith or a Remedy or someone like that, maybe?

 

9 minutes ago, YaManSmevz said:

Even with the rude awakening I've gotten with SA, I still gotta go San Andreas, Bully, then Warriors, all of which with a pretty slim margin.

 

However, in all fairness I still have Red Dead Redemption in my backlog

 

Red Dead is still a great game - though I never ended up getting RDR2 after a dude I know who loved the first one even more than me was crushed after playing it, and basically told me to steer clear!