Need help to tone down my OCD towards trophies!

[RCN886]

Hey guys. I'm new here so - Hello

 

I wanted to get your opinions on a little problem I'm having. I also posted this elsewhere on another trophy forum so I'll just copy and paste here:

 

Hey all. Long time lurker but only had the courage to join up today as I feel it would be best to ask you guys about a problem I'm having. It may seem over-reacting and may be a bit of a read, but I need to get it out as I really don't have anybody else to talk to to get it out of my system so...

To put it simply, trophy-hunting has turned my gaming into a chore it seems. I simply care too much about trophies and getting them then actually playing the game for fun. 

I grew up with the Nintendo 64 and adored that little machine. From Super Mario 64 to Banjo-Kazooie to Donkey Kong 64. Had amazing fun. Then I didn't game for a long time - about 6-7 years. Then I out of the blue bought a Xbox 360 when GTA IV was released. For about 4 years I gamed purely for fun without achievement hunting. I just played, and really didn't pay attention to those achievements that kept popping up. Then I noticed them more and before I knew it, I joined up with XBA and started achievement hunting obsessively. Did that for about 3 years and burnt myself out. I started making gaming a chore. Just playing for achievements to make my gamerscore higher. That's no way to game.

So cut to a couple months later, I bought a PS3. Again, at first for about a year I just played without noticing trophies all that much. And then the same thing happened. but much much worse. I got so into trophy-hunting, I am ashamed to admit I did stupid things to get trophies and wasted so much money to get them. I've spent over $200 just getting games with easy trophies. For the past year, I have been gaming just to obtain trophies. That's it. If a game has a hard difficulty, I won't play. Simple.

I have a huge backlog now as I have many games that a hard-platinums (Metal Gear Solid 4 comes to mind) that I will not play due to not wanting it to affect my completion ratio. I have missed out on so many games I could be enjoying simply because the trophy list is too hard, and I would rather waste money on easy platinums.

It's not until only recently I've decided to really think about things and my priorities in life. Gaming has been my number 1 priority. I have a fiancée and we are desperately trying to save for our wedding, but I keep wasting money on said games. I have made everything else important in my life (career, social, money) take a back-seat just so I can game more. I have a casual job (more like a call-in job as hours can vary from week to week. I can get maybe only 3 hours one week, but then 12 the next) but haven't pushed myself to get a part-time or full-time job for fear of not being able to play as often. Trophy-hunting has also effected my personality. I am now highly-anxious and get depressed more often. I have also gained a lot of weight. I'm not huge, but I'm not healthy either.

Another thing that got me to join this site and speak all this is that I was doing stupid things for trophies that I just kept thinking to myself "Why am I doing this?" This included leaving my PS Vita on overnight for two nights for a trophy in Minecraft. Again for the PS4 version too. Rubber-banding my controller for a few games. And generally just stuff I don't normally like just for a trophy (collecting items, playing games multiple times that I don't enjoy). I've even bought multiple consoles just to self-boost.

Enough is enough. I need to change. I want to go back having fun in games. I want to game for a hobby, not treat it like a job I hate. I know I have it in me. I'm just trying to re-kindle or re-ignite that passion I used to have back when I had the N64, during the first year of the Xbox 360 and my first year with the PS3. I want trophies to be the last thing on my mind. I've gone over several options the past few days to try to change. And I've come down to this.

I could abandon my PSN account. Just drop it and try to put it behind me. This way I could game without the urge of trophy-hunting or fear of hurting my completion percentage. I could maybe look page one day in the future and think, "man I had a problem! So glad I'm gaming for fun now!"

I could keep going with my account and just try to ignore the trophies. It would be very hard as my addictive nature I do not have control over it seems.

I could start fresh which is looking like a good option. Start fresh, keep away from my trophy list. Let it automatically sync my trophies without having to look at them and be reminded of that "urge" and keep away from PSNProfiles as that contributes to my trophy-hunting ways (constantly checking my list to see what I need to complete) Play the games I've wanted for so long and not worry about trophies.

I've even considered getting a Wii U as to re-kindle my "Nintendo days". Also the fact there are no achievements/trophies of any kind may help.

I would absolutely love and adore it if you guys could give me your opinions or advice. Have you guys ever gone through this? Success stories? Anything! I really need your help. I apologise this was a long read. But as I'm finishing typing all this up, I feel better already that I got this off my chest. I just need help. Simple as that. I value anything you have to offer in the way of words 

Thank you guys so much for reading this.

EDIT: I also apologise if this is in the wrong section.

[soniq]

Welcome to the forums!

 

If you don't enjoy hunting trophies anymore but also can't kick the habit it doesn't really matter if you create a new profile or not.

Maybe sell all your PS stuff (or put it in a box, give that box to someone you trust and tell them to not give it back for 1 year), buy a Wii U and/or 3DS and play for fun.

[StrickenBiged]

So, I'm guessing that the account you're using here is an alt-account. Fair enough.

 

My advice: try to game for fun. Turn off trophy notifications in settings and pick up one of those games that you've been looking forward to but haven't played yet because the plat was too hard.

 

Just play. Don't look at the trophy lists either before or during play. When you get bored of that game, pick up the next one. Some games you will want to complete because they're more fun than others. Some you will get bored of. Stop playing a game when you naturally get bored.

 

The only person who cares about your completion ratio or platinum count is you. You got yourself into this mess and you can get yourself out of it. 

 

Get some exercise and take care of yourself. Even a walk is better than nothing, and makes a start. Grab a 60 minute podcast on a topic you are interested in and step out your front door. Don't come home and don't stop walking until the podcast is done. Try and walk somewhere green and leafy if possible, your brain likes these spaces. Do this every day. If you can or when you feel able to, do some more intense exercise like running or lifting weights. Exercise is a great way to battle depression, not just the excess flab.

[RCN886]

So, I'm guessing that the account you're using here is an alt-account. Fair enough.

 

My advice: try to game for fun. Turn off trophy notifications in settings and pick up one of those games that you've been looking forward to but haven't played yet because the plat was too hard.

 

Just play. Don't look at the trophy lists either before or during play. When you get bored of that game, pick up the next one. Some games you will want to complete because they're more fun than others. Some you will get bored of. Stop playing a game when you naturally get bored.

 

The only person who cares about your completion ratio or platinum count is you. You got yourself into this mess and you can get yourself out of it. 

 

Get some exercise and take care of yourself. Even a walk is better than nothing, and makes a start. Grab a 60 minute podcast on a topic you are interested in and step out your front door. Don't come home and don't stop walking until the podcast is done. Try and walk somewhere green and leafy if possible, your brain likes these spaces. Do this every day. If you can or when you feel able to, do some more intense exercise like running or lifting weights. Exercise is a great way to battle depression, not just the excess flab.

 

Thanks for the words mate.

 

Yes the account on here is just an alt account as I didn't want to use the account I'm talking about.

 

I thought they took away the option to disable trophy notifications? As I was browsing the world wide web last night I came across a lot of people who said they got rid of that option. might have to check it out on the PS3 later on.

 

Exercise would be great for me. There is no denying that! And it's what I want to do. Might check out some podcasts somewhere out there.

 

Now as for accounts, should I start anew so that I don't look at my trophy list and get "tempted" again? Or just continue on?

[Dr_WPJTPCSPCDM]

First of all I must admit I've never been as bad as you describe with trophy hunting but I have suffered similar responses to other things in life and the only person who can get you out is you. I have a few suggestions that MAY help, but they're only that suggestions, no guarantee they'll work for you. First things first turn OFF notifications, if you're trying to get away from the need of trophies then a reminder of their existence whenever you do anything simple that earns one isn't going to help. Starting a new account may help you but it's a decision you've got to make for yourself and do whatever you think will work best for your psyche/personality. Personally I think it might be a good idea, at least to start with, as you can have that little backup barrier in the back of your mind that says 'if this all goes wrong I've still got my old account, I've not lost my completion stats and all the rest". With your new account never look at the trophy lists, if you do this with the notifications off then you'll never know how well or badly your doing and can stop a game whenever you've had enough of it without worrying how far you've got with it.

The Wii-U might help but I'd be very wary off just doing it because. You said you're trying to save money with your fiancee, spending out on another console isn't going to help that. I'd reccommend only doing that if you sell/trade in one of your other consoles to offset the cost. Otherwise you're just creating even more money outgoings on something you have no idea if it will work.

 

Finally stop altogether for a bit. Even if it's only a week. Do other things, watch films/TV, go for a walk, spend time with your fiancee, anything that takes your mind off games and then come back to your fresh new account without notifications and just play the first thing in your collection that you see and think will be fun. As soon as you stop enjoying it switch games or take a break from the console and do something else for the rest of the day.

 

If you start missing the sound of the trophies popping then what you've got isn't OCD but an addiction, at that point there's only two options: 'cold turkey' or the one that sounds a little childish, get an audio of the notification sound, give your fiancee a copy and get her to play it whenever she thinks you've made a 'real life achievement' of some kind. Whether that be sending a CV off somewhere, or helping decide on a particular thing for the wedding or whatever. As said that only works for addiction rather than OCD as it would move your fix from game to real world interactions.

 

Good luck.

[antithesis]

My completion rate is a touch under 52% with over 4500 unearned trophies. Does it bother me? Occasionally, and I do try to work on my backlog of incomplete games. But at some point in time, it all becomes irrelevant - in my mind, it's 100 plats. Anything beyond that is a bonus.

Gaming is meant to be fun, not a chore. Get over it and keep playing on your main and forget about grinding out the pointless trophies. Or play games for fun on an alt where completion rate doesn't matter.

[MesopithecusUK]

I'd actually be interested to see your real account, just to understand the extent to which you mean.

It sounds like you've got yourself into a bit of a vicious cycle, but it seems like trophy hunting is only part of something bigger. Please excuse me if I sound harsh here (and I do speak from my own personal experience too here) but maybe the obsession with trophies is compensating for a sense of achievement?

How does your partner feel about your trophy hunting?

[RCN886]

First of all I must admit I've never been as bad as you describe with trophy hunting but I have suffered similar responses to other things in life and the only person who can get you out is you. I have a few suggestions that MAY help, but they're only that suggestions, no guarantee they'll work for you. First things first turn OFF notifications, if you're trying to get away from the need of trophies then a reminder of their existence whenever you do anything simple that earns one isn't going to help. Starting a new account may help you but it's a decision you've got to make for yourself and do whatever you think will work best for your psyche/personality. Personally I think it might be a good idea, at least to start with, as you can have that little backup barrier in the back of your mind that says 'if this all goes wrong I've still got my old account, I've not lost my completion stats and all the rest". With your new account never look at the trophy lists, if you do this with the notifications off then you'll never know how well or badly your doing and can stop a game whenever you've had enough of it without worrying how far you've got with it.

The Wii-U might help but I'd be very wary off just doing it because. You said you're trying to save money with your fiancee, spending out on another console isn't going to help that. I'd reccommend only doing that if you sell/trade in one of your other consoles to offset the cost. Otherwise you're just creating even more money outgoings on something you have no idea if it will work.

 

Finally stop altogether for a bit. Even if it's only a week. Do other things, watch films/TV, go for a walk, spend time with your fiancee, anything that takes your mind off games and then come back to your fresh new account without notifications and just play the first thing in your collection that you see and think will be fun. As soon as you stop enjoying it switch games or take a break from the console and do something else for the rest of the day.

 

If you start missing the sound of the trophies popping then what you've got isn't OCD but an addiction, at that point there's only two options: 'cold turkey' or the one that sounds a little childish, get an audio of the notification sound, give your fiancee a copy and get her to play it whenever she thinks you've made a 'real life achievement' of some kind. Whether that be sending a CV off somewhere, or helping decide on a particular thing for the wedding or whatever. As said that only works for addiction rather than OCD as it would move your fix from game to real world interactions.

 

Good luck.

 

Can't thank you enough for your words mate. Very much appreciate it. Yeah the Wii U option might not be the best. didn't really think of that until you brought that up

 

I hope there is a way to turn off trophy notifications. I have it in my head that ppl will judge me for what I have on my list. Sadly a couple people have, including a friend. So that constantly makes me want to be at the top of my game when it comes to trophies. Stupid I know.

 

My completion rate is a touch under 52% with over 4500 unearned trophies. Does it bother me? Occasionally, and I do try to work on my backlog of incomplete games. But at some point in time, it all becomes irrelevant - in my mind, it's 100 plats. Anything beyond that is a bonus.

Gaming is meant to be fun, not a chore. Get over it and keep playing on your main and forget about grinding out the pointless trophies. Or play games for fun on an alt where completion rate doesn't matter.

 

Thank you as well

 

I'd actually be interested to see your real account, just to understand the extent to which you mean.

It sounds like you've got yourself into a bit of a vicious cycle, but it seems like trophy hunting is only part of something bigger. Please excuse me if I sound harsh here (and I do speak from my own personal experience too here) but maybe the obsession with trophies is compensating for a sense of achievement?

How does your partner feel about your trophy hunting?

 

I do very much agree that my obsession with trophies has to do with not doing very well in life. I have not accomplished anything in life and I'm almost hitting 30.

 

My partner is supportive. If I go for trophies she is supportive. I also told her all about this problem, and again -  very supportive. She just wants me to have fun and be happy.

[DrBloodmoney]

Just get all the trophies. Then you wont have to worry about it anymore....

But seriously, it is fun to try and increase your completion ratio, but my advice would actually be to put a few games on your list that are unobtainably plats, or at least so prohibitivly difficult that you know you wont finish them.

That way the edge will be take off the 100% lust, and you can just enjoy the ups and downs of your profile - I like to go for 100%s, but I know I cant reach a erfect profile, as there are umobtainable games on my profile (some due to servers, some due to grinds im unwilling to do) and so I never get the OCD about trying for a perfect profile.

[StrickenBiged]

Thanks for the words mate.

 

Yes the account on here is just an alt account as I didn't want to use the account I'm talking about.

 

I thought they took away the option to disable trophy notifications? As I was browsing the world wide web last night I came across a lot of people who said they got rid of that option. might have to check it out on the PS3 later on.

 

Exercise would be great for me. There is no denying that! And it's what I want to do. Might check out some podcasts somewhere out there.

 

Now as for accounts, should I start anew so that I don't look at my trophy list and get "tempted" again? Or just continue on?

 

No problem dude. 

 

I don't know 100% if you can disable trophy pops on PS3. I know you can on PS4. 

 

Seriously, get some exercise. You will feel tonnes better. Just been through a bout of getting too into games myself (I blame all the recent releases, which I even took time off work to play) but after about a week of staying up late, not exercising etc, I felt like shit. Been back in the gym this week and I feel much better already.

 

I don't see the point in starting a new account personally. I think you'd just end up doing the same thing on that one. Like DrBloodmoney says, getting a few games on your regular account that you are playing because you actually enjoy them rather than are just chasing trophies might help you break the cycle. But maybe that's just me...

 

Don't worry about the games on your real list by the way. At least on this site we're generally all supportive (those who aren't quickly find they're not welcome) and we've all got things like Megamind on our accounts...

[Xxleonardo97xX]

-Deactivate trophy pop notifications

-Don't buy any more games for trophies

 

Play games you truly enjoy and platinum those games, this way you can have platinums but only on games you love.

[RCN886]

No problem dude. 

 

I don't know 100% if you can disable trophy pops on PS3. I know you can on PS4. 

 

Seriously, get some exercise. You will feel tonnes better. Just been through a bout of getting too into games myself (I blame all the recent releases, which I even took time off work to play) but after about a week of staying up late, not exercising etc, I felt like shit. Been back in the gym this week and I feel much better already.

 

I don't see the point in starting a new account personally. I think you'd just end up doing the same thing on that one. Like DrBloodmoney says, getting a few games on your regular account that you are playing because you actually enjoy them rather than are just chasing trophies might help you break the cycle. But maybe that's just me...

 

Don't worry about the games on your real list by the way. At least on this site we're generally all supportive (those who aren't quickly find they're not welcome) and we've all got things like Megamind on our accounts...

 

Exercise it is then! One thing I lack is motivation, but I feel I'm in the right frame of mind to make a change so I have my fingers crossed!

[StrickenBiged]

Exercise it is then! One thing I lack is motivation, but I feel I'm in the right frame of mind to make a change so I have my fingers 

 

Think about why you want to make a change, and start small with realistic goals. You can do it!

[RCN886]

Think about why you want to make a change, and start small with realistic goals. You can do it!

 

Thanks mate. I figure I can start going for a walk for 30 mins every day might be a good start.

[wildstwawberries]

Totally understand this. I sugggest taking a break from gaming. when you feel an urge to come back and play a certain game, do it. and have fun on that game!

[Beyondthegrave07]

-Deactivate trophy pop notifications

-Don't buy any more games for trophies

 

Play games you truly enjoy and platinum those games, this way you can have platinums but only on games you love.

^this. Try to platinum games that you really love. I learned over time that obsessing about trophies will take away from the experience.

[broy300]

A couple things.

 

Go see your doctor. Seriously. You might be very surprised on what he/she might have to say. This "addiction" and yes that's what it is, might be a sign of bigger issues.

 

Goals. Sounds like you are a smart guy that knows this is not a healthy hobby. Is trophy hunting horrible? Nope, not at all so try these things

 

-no gaming before you call into work

-no gaming before an hour of exercise

-no gaming until you clean the bathroom

-no gaming before you update your resume

etc....etc...

 

Talk to your fiance, write down these goals and REWARD yourself on a daily basis. For every item done on your list, reward yourself with an hour of game time.... hell use an egg timer or phone to remind you

 

I don't think changing your account, disabling trophies, not checking trophy sites will matter If you do not get down to the root cause.

[RCN886]

A couple things.

 

Go see your doctor. Seriously. You might be very surprised on what he/she might have to say. This "addiction" and yes that's what it is, might be a sign of bigger issues.

 

Goals. Sounds like you are a smart guy that knows this is not a healthy hobby. Is trophy hunting horrible? Nope, not at all so try these things

 

-no gaming before you call into work

-no gaming before an hour of exercise

-no gaming until you clean the bathroom

-no gaming before you update your resume

etc....etc...

 

Talk to your fiance, write down these goals and REWARD yourself on a daily basis. For every item done on your list, reward yourself with an hour of game time.... hell use an egg timer or phone to remind you

 

I don't think changing your account, disabling trophies, not checking trophy sites will matter If you do not get down to the root cause.

 

If you think I should talk to a doctor, I don't see the harm in doing it. I mean what is the worst thing that could happen really?

 

And that's a really good idea about some kind of "Reward" system. Every suggestion in this thread has been excellent and I will be taking all advice and implementing it

[DrBloodmoney]

I do very much agree that my obsession with trophies has to do with not doing very well in life. I have not accomplished anything in life and I'm almost hitting 30.

 

My partner is supportive. If I go for trophies she is supportive. I also told her all about this problem, and again -  very supportive. She just wants me to have fun and be happy.

Can I just point out thay these two sentences are wildly contradictory - Having a loving and supportive partner IS an acomplishment, at any point in life. I imagine that while you may not feel you have 'acomplished' anything and are nearing 30, there are a shit ton of 40 or 50 year olds that would look at your life and envy some aspect.

The things that maybe you take for granted or dont see as acomplishments may well be the things other would see as enviable....

"A thimbles worth of milky moon can touch hearts larger than a thimble..."

[Lovejinder_LJ]

Wow, that's some serious OCD

I had something similar in the beginning when, before I even started the game I would go to the trophies and see if there are any simple ones I can do along with the story but I eventually overcame it by trying to play through the game first and when I was done with it, that is enjoying the story and other stuff first and when done, then thinking about the trophies.

Hope mine and all the other ideas from the community help you overcome it

GOOD LUCK  

 

[StrickenBiged]

I lost...

[ExHaseo]

You only have 10 games on your profile, 2 plats, and a 34.12% completion rate. You don't seem like you're very addicted to trophy hunting like described in the post.

 

But anyway, here's my opinion on the matter. Like any addiction, the only way to get over it, is to stop doing it. For trophy/achievement hunting, that means no longer playing any system, or game, with trophies/achievements. So, you should sell your consoles and games that earn you trophies and achievements.

Otherwise, the temptation will always be there, and if you have that addictive of a personality, you're not ever going to be able to just stop. You're always going to be running into problems. That's what an addiction is. You can try to convince yourself that you won't be tempted, or that there's some kind of secret so that you can continue gaming without the lure of your addiction, but you will always be tempted.

It's a bit like if a smoker quits, but then hangs out with people who all smoke. They aren't going to just not be able to smoke when all of their friends are standing around smoking. 

[merciful84]

I'm no therapist (just married to one) but I'm about 95% positive that recognizing and admitting that you have a problem is a good start. I guess you have to ask yourself a few questions:

 

• What was initially my reason for gaming?
• Is that reason the same today?
• If not, why?
• How does earning achievements and trophies make me feel?
• What is the difference (if any) between the way they make me feel and gaming in itself makes me feel?
• Is there some other area in life that I feel un or underachieved in and am trying make up for that with gaming achievements?
• What is it that I plan to accomplish by 100%ing every game that I have?
• Will it ever stop?
• Can I continue to play video games one day without worrying about 100%ing each game that I play?

[StrickenBiged]

I think we should be careful throwing around words like "addiction" on this thread. I may have been guilty of using it casually myself, but addiction has a specific meaning and a medical context. I don't think - but am happy to be proven wrong - that there has been a medical case or study showing that gaming or, more specifically trophies, can be addictive in that sense.
 
"Addiction" usually relates to substances. It's not like OP is injecting trophies up his arm.
 
I prefer the term gaming "compulsion" as it doesn't carry the baggage or the unnecessary medical connotation of "addiction". Behaviours, such as trophy farming, can become compulsive, but not addictive.
 
Which all reminds me, OP may find these videos helpful, not for any solutions but to put his problem in context and reassurance that he is not alone:

 

 

 

Edited December 9, 2014 by StrickenBiged

[Xxleonardo97xX]

You only have 10 games on your profile, 2 plats, and a 34.12% completion rate. You don't seem like you're very addicted to trophy hunting like described in the post.

 

But anyway, here's my opinion on the matter. Like any addiction, the only way to get over it, is to stop doing it. For trophy/achievement hunting, that means no longer playing any system, or game, with trophies/achievements. So, you should sell your consoles and games that earn you trophies and achievements.

Otherwise, the temptation will always be there, and if you have that addictive of a personality, you're not ever going to be able to just stop. You're always going to be running into problems. That's what an addiction is. You can try to convince yourself that you won't be tempted, or that there's some kind of secret so that you can continue gaming without the lure of your addiction, but you will always be tempted.

It's a bit like if a smoker quits, but then hangs out with people who all smoke. They aren't going to just not be able to smoke when all of their friends are standing around smoking. 

 

Alternate account, inform yourself before saying things like that.