Copanele's collection of trophies and experiences

[Copanele]

14 hours ago, YaManSmevz said:

 

I got excited, then sad, then horrified for you. I'm sorry man, that's some shit

Yeah that was pretty much my experience. When I did the online first, the game didn't look so bad, I was "heh, this one is a freebie"

Then I actually played the game...the pain, the horrors, the framerate drops...

The weirdest part is, the game wouldn't technically be bad, if it wouldn't give me vertigo each time I started a fight. But just like the actual Dragon Ball story, it's all about the fights, not logic/camera/consistency  

 

8 hours ago, Platinum_Vice said:

Soooooo... play it?

By all means, go ahead! I ain't paying for the medication though ?

 

 

 

Just to add, I believe this game is still better than Catherine. But only because it's a fighting game  

"Days without crapping on Catherine" counter has been successfully reset once again ?

[Yuber6969]

Big congrats for this plat! You always made this game sound like such a pain, but now that I've read about it in detail... holy shit.

 

Now I can say it's unlikely that I'll ever play this one, despite eventually wanting to play all of the Dragon Ball games. That three-star system sounds so tedious, and that alone makes me not want to play.

 

But all of the RNG stuff and the All Ruined trophy seal the deal for me; I'm not touching this shit.

 

Let me know if you pick up another PS3 DB game. I'll pick it up and boost it with you as long as it's not as bad as this one lol.

Edited March 5, 2023 by Yuber6969
Typo

[Copanele]

21 minutes ago, Yuber6969 said:

Big congrats for this plat! You always made this game sound like such a pain, but now that I've read about it in detail... holy shit.

 

Now I can say it's unlikely that I'll ever play this one, despite eventually wanting to play all of the Dragon Ball games. That three-star system sounds so tedious, and that alone makes me not want to play.

 

But all of the RNG stuff and the All Ruined trophy seal the deal for me; I'm not touching this shit.

 

Let me know if you pick up another PS3 DB game. I'll pick it up and boost it with you as long as it's not as bad as this one lol.

Big thanks! And yep, if I ever want to play another DB game on PS3 (not sure why i would do that but hey you never know with me), I will let you know!

 

And yep...honestly I would have recommended you this game if it wasn't for the RNG bullshit and absolutely abysmal grind that you have to do. Really, the difficulty itself would be at most a 4/10, the AI is mad stupid even in Extreme Battles. But having to waste 10+ hours for a stupid Guard Break in a time attack mode....

You're better off playing other games ?

[Shrooba]

On 04/03/2023 at 7:48 PM, Copanele said:

#No. 222 - Dragon Ball Raging Blast

Niiice, the beast has been tamed! ? Been meaning to comment on here sooner. It's been a... blast... seeing you play DB Raging Blast and getting through the hellish nightmare that is the platinum trophy for this one!

 

On 04/03/2023 at 7:48 PM, Copanele said:

This is a heavy RNG based trophy, because you can be damn sure that the CPU will NOT act as you expect. Out of my 70+ tries for this damn trophy, over half of them were failed because I could not land a damn guard crush, the enemy would JUST NOT BLOCK!!!AT ALL! It made me want to throw the disc at some point.

Here's where you made a mistake. Games are of course just bunches of code... Until you pray that you need it to act a certain way, in which case it becomes a sentient being that can smell fear. That leads to a lot of the allure that comes to this specific game; playing it casually (but not so casually that you want it to do what you want) is also a gamble since 99% of the game you NEED that darn AI to sit down and behave ?

And of course, no playable Mr. Satan, but he IS the strongest fighter in the universe so it'd be unfair!

[Copanele]

47 minutes ago, Shrooba said:

Niiice, the beast has been tamed! Been meaning to comment on here sooner. It's been a... blast... seeing you play DB Raging Blast and getting through the hellish nightmare that is the platinum trophy for this one!

 

Here's where you made a mistake. Games are of course just bunches of code... Until you pray that you need it to act a certain way, in which case it becomes a sentient being that can smell fear. That leads to a lot of the allure that comes to this specific game; playing it casually (but not so casually that you want it to do what you want) is also a gamble since 99% of the game you NEED that darn AI to sit down and behave

 

OF COURSE! You are right! It's similar to the moments when I want to save a Word document while I am in a hurry or I wish to print something important on my printer that printed 1000+ pages without a single issue. 

The moment the machines feel fear they initiate the Sarah Connor directive and sabotage me at every step. That applies to games as well ?

Goddamnit, I played myself

47 minutes ago, Shrooba said:

And of course, no playable Mr. Satan, but he IS the strongest fighter in the universe so it'd be unfair!

Sadly I doubt they had the budget to add that kind of MANLINESS in the game  

 

[Puppeter04]

On 4/3/2023 at 9:18 AM, Copanele said:

#No. 222 - Dragon Ball Raging Blast

 

 

 

I tucked myself into bed last night and started to read, I was sooooooo excited when I saw it was my time to laugh. 

 

HA-HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't know how much hair you have but maybe getting a buzz cut honoring your Balkan origins would be a good idea to not lose it in times of frustration...?

 

 

Congrats on getting this out of the way, I had a blast reading it! Still waiting for Catherin tho, I wanna laugh again ?

[Copanele]

1 hour ago, Puppeter04 said:

 

I tucked myself into bed last night and started to read, I was sooooooo excited when I saw it was my time to laugh. 

 

HA-HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't know how much hair you have but maybe getting a buzz cut honoring your Balkan origins would be a good idea to not lose it in times of frustration...

 

Oh dear god no, I can't handle the insult of wearing that kind of haircut ? I already disappointed my Balkan brethren for not enjoying FIFA or Mortal Kombat, so I'll pile up one more disappointment for them!

1 hour ago, Puppeter04 said:

 

Congrats on getting this out of the way, I had a blast reading it! Still waiting for Catherin tho, I wanna laugh again 

Oh damn...Catherine....that one would be a review for the ages.

IF I ever finish it.

fuck that game

[Eqill5]

On 05/03/2023 at 2:58 PM, Puppeter04 said:

Congrats on getting this out of the way, I had a blast reading it! Still waiting for Catherin tho, I wanna laugh again 

I often check back in here hoping for that review, even just a single extra trophy obtained. One day!!

[Copanele]

47 minutes ago, Eqill5 said:

I often check back in here hoping for that review, even just a single extra trophy obtained. One day!!

I already have a huge list of people I need to tag once I platinum that game. IF I platinum that game  

[Puppeter04]

50 minutes ago, Copanele said:

I already have a huge list of people I need to tag once I platinum that game. IF I platinum that game  

  "IF IF IF"?, let's do something

 

I'll plat Catherine FB (it's not gonna be soon, you can breath), IF and this one is the important IF, if I do it before you do, you'll pay for my coffee that day ? deal? 

[Copanele]

5 hours ago, Puppeter04 said:

  "IF IF IF", let's do something

 

I'll plat Catherine FB (it's not gonna be soon, you can breath), IF and this one is the important IF, if I do it before you do, you'll pay for my coffee that day  deal? 

The F(ull)B(ullshit) version is cheating ?? but lmao ok, you getting through that pain is worth a coffee exchange lol!

....how much coffee do you drink daily? Should I take a loan in advance? ?

 

Also before people going "yey free Starbucks", I ain't buying coffee to anyone else, go brew your own!

[Puppeter04]

3 hours ago, Copanele said:

The F(ull)B(ullshit) version is cheating  but lmao ok, you getting through that pain is worth a coffee exchange lol!

....how much coffee do you drink daily? Should I take a loan in advance?

 

Also before people going "yey free Starbucks", I ain't buying coffee to anyone else, go brew your own!

You know i don't have my PS3 here!!! But if I get it, I'll play its version instead or even better, both versions, i don't think is gonna be worse than a huge ubi grind or that time I platted Sound Shapes (my masochist self took the lead, never again)

 

We are in Europe, coffee is less than 2 bucks and Starbucks is too much for me so no loans needed ? i usually drink twice, the first one, I brew it at home so I'm happy with the second one being paid? 

Edited March 7, 2023 by Puppeter04

[Copanele]

9 hours ago, Puppeter04 said:

You know i don't have my PS3 here!!! But if I get it, I'll play its version instead or even better, both versions, i don't think is gonna be worse than a huge ubi grind or that time I platted Sound Shapes (my masochist self took the lead, never again)

 

Ehehehehe...he....he...I think it will quite a bit different from collecting chests and cockades with Arno  

But pain is subjective. Apparently people really loved this game (for some reason ?)

9 hours ago, Puppeter04 said:

We are in Europe, coffee is less than 2 bucks and Starbucks is too much for me so no loans needed  i usually drink twice, the first one, I brew it at home so I'm happy with the second one being paid 

WHEW! I was worried you're like one of my friends who needs 3 coffees in the morning just to wake up. And that's morning ONLY!

Hell yeah, coffee treat it is!

[Copanele]

WARNING - the following post will have quite a number of possible spoilers about Yakuza 5. I can't really talk about this game without giving away some plot points so...read at your own risk  

 

 No. 223 - Yakuza 5

 

 

Platinum Name - The Dream, Fulfilled 

Hardest Trophy - Hall of Famer  achieve 100% completion on your list

Difficulty - between 6/10 and 7.5/10 - depending on how screwed you'll get at Pachinko

 

And here we are, at the famed, fabled and utterly epic 5th installment of the Yakuza series. At this point I really am looking forward to playing each entry of the Ryu Ga Gotoku/Yakuza/Sega games, because every one of them delivered in some way or the other. I do take care to take extensive breaks between games, because I can get easily burned out from too much punching, kicking or gambling.

Anyway, I was really excited to play Yakuza 5. It was hailed as one of the best entries in the series, some saying it's THE best, the most ambitious with the most memorable characters. It was really hyped (maybe abit overhyped at points). So far none of the games dropped the ball, not even Dead Souls, so you can imagine how eager I was to start this one. And so I did.

 

....and I started to feel a mild disappointment from the first few hours. Which turned into full blown "wtf is this shit" . Then it reverted to a pretty good time, just to end in one of the most "what is this crap that I am playing" moments of this year so far.

 

Yakuza 5 turned out to be a huge disappointment for me.

 

Now, do not think that the game itself is bad. Oh hell no, the game in itself is quite amazing from an objective point of view. You have a grand total of 5 cities, 5 characters that you play as, the combat is refined to the point where you forgot you had to play Yakuza 3, the characters themselves are a treat. Kiryu is the same Kiryu, you have the previous installment members Saejima and Akiyama that are just as epic as they were in Yakuza 4. You can finally control Haruka herself, who turned into quite the young lady and you will have some interesting substories with her while she is trying to prove herself  Sadly, Tanimura won't return from Yakuza 4, him being replaced by Shinada, a former baseball player who has fallen from grace and tries to survive by writing raunchy articles. While I can't say I particularly liked Shinada, I warmed up to him and started to enjoy his antics and even his baseball minigame (me hating that game with all my passion).

 

All cities are quite lively, maybe a bit too lively, since you bump into groups of people every 3 seconds. Of course, no Yakuza game is complete without Kamurocho, but now you have the city Nagasugai, where Kiryu can practice his taxi driving skills, Tsukimino, a northern city perfect for Saejima, the old fan favorite Sotenbori where you help Haruka to turn into an idol and help Akiyama to be...well...Akiyama, and my favorite of them all, Shinada's city Kineicho, which is the most lively city of them all. Honestly Kineicho felt on par with Kamurocho in terms of store placements, activities and just...city vibes. It's definitely up there together with Ryukyu from Yakuza 3.

 

The activities and minigames are back, stronger than ever. Together with the usual batting (which is just as shit as ever), bowling, golf etc. you have new minigames. Cochin races are basically chicken racing and it's one of the most hilarious minigames out there. You have to train your chicken and invest in it in order to win various prizes and cups. Since your chicken can't run forever, you have to carefully breed a new generation of chickens to train and use in racing. It's hilarious and I ended up spending a lot of time in this minigame.

Table Tennis has been replaced with air hockey, which is actually table hockey played with sexy ladies. I found this minigame to be abit tricky but with some practice (and focus on the lady opponent's chest), it was enjoyable enough.

What wasn't enjoyable was the Pachinko minigame, a new addition to Yakuza series (unless you played Dead Souls). Pachinko is a convoluted way of playing Slots Machines, they're literally "thematic slot machines" and the reason we don't have Silent Hill or Metal Gear games anymore  you need to collect a certain number of balls from a slot machine with various events. There's some useless convoluted shit inserted in this minigame but everything resumes to "pray that you get a jackpot". Just like in real life slot machines. It's typical to the Japanese to overcomplicate stupid shit, so yeah...you'll hate this minigame.

Another stupid minigame is snowball fight, where you have to fight other 3 opponents in a First Person Snowball fighter. The aiming is atrocious so you will have to do some exploiting.

 

Hope you trained your chicken well!

 

Overall, you'd think that the game doesn't sound too bad...and yeah indeed it isn't. But, a Yakuza game is nothing without the story, unlike games like, say, GTA, where you can drift on pedestrians' heads with your brand new tank, Yakuza series needs a very important ingredient - the story. A yakuza game without a story is pretty much nothing, you NEED the reason to move forward.

 

Honestly, I found the Yakuza 5 story to be the most disappointing story of all Yakuza games. My god did this story suck ass. It was such a bad story that it affected my gameplay, it made NO sense and I really could NOT focus on beating thugs because of the stupid story bits. It really feels like the writer started the story without having any idea how to finish it and just made everything up on the go. There's no coherency, no reason why everything is happening and pretty much why is everyone going along with the stupid plans.

Also everyone is saying the word "yume" (which means dream) at every 2 sentences, turning this game's dialogue into a third rate shonen script.

Once more, just like Yakuza's "ARE YOU SURE" messages:

 

STORY SPOILERS ONWARDS

 

Hope you are all ready, because it's time for me to talk about the story. Won't cover ALL the points, you go play this game yourself, but my GOD what a garbage ass story. Let's start from the beginning:

 

Part 1 - Kazuma Kiryu - The Depressed Dragon

 

Kiryu decides to leave his life behind and relocates to a new city as a taxi driver in hopes that his past won't affect the people he cares about anymore. Honestly I can't complain about Kiryu's motivations in this game, his altruistic motives is what pushes this series forward despite him having to bear all the pain and burdens. However this all falls apart from the first minutes when you see none other than Daigo Dojima, the world's most useless mafioso, getting into Kiryu's cab. You know very well that once again, Yakuza's no.1 clan the Tojos are again in deep shit and it only takes one man to punch everything into place.

 

I HATE THE TOJO CLAN. It's the most useless group of bumbling fools ever. How in the everloving FUCK is this clan STILL No.1? Their leaders are incompetent, they keep getting clowned on by every two bit villain with more than one brain cell and they keep pulling Kiryu in their shitty plot points. I swear at this point, Kiryu is Mario and the Tojo Clan is Princess Peach.

Anyway regardless, once Daigo meets Kiryu, he briefly disappears for good, throwing the entire clan into disarray, so it's up to Kiryu and Daigo's two henchmen to figure out what the fuck is happening. Moreover, a particular detective officer recommends Kiryu to move his ass to Kamurocho. Remember the henchmen and the detective, they will be important later.

 

Honestly...I wouldn't have minded if they removed Kiryu completely from the story. Yeah his Taxi sub-missions are fun but my god why do they even bother? Kiryu dodges rockets, beats entire clans, he simply is a reason for the Tojo to fuck up. At this point Kiryu himself should move to some remote place in the world like...I don't know, Kenya, although I bet he's gonna be found there as well. Besides that Kiryu feels just...tired of everything. Which is a good point that the writer makes but coincidentally it also makes me feel tired of him.

Basically Kiryu got turned into a Mary Sue in this game, all he does is right and all he punches is defeatable and defeated. 

 

One exception is Kiryu's "rival" in this game - Masaru Watase, a captain of the opposing Omi Alliance. He is the spiritual successor of Ryuji Goda from Yakuza 2 and MY GOD IS HE A PHENOMENAL character. He's all the pride, brawn and respect that Ryuji would command, minus the stupidity. Watase is one of my favorite characters in the game and thankfully he shows up just enough for him to make a lasting impact.

 

Kiryu's gameplay is good though. He has the evolved Dragon style that can be upgraded as usual, together with a Dragon stance where Kiryu is invincible at the cost of his heat meter. The devs were not lazy in this department, punches feel as satisfying as ever and some heat actions are even more brutal than ever.

But we have to abandon Kiryu for a short while and get to the next member of the circus.

 

Part 2 - Taiga Saejima - Crouching Tiger, Hidden Idiot

 

Saejima's story actually starts 2 years prior to Yakuza 5. Once he redeemed himself from the events of Yakuza 4 (18 rubber bullets), Saejima is welcomed into the Tojo clan. Except not really. Since Mr Taiga has been in the slammer for so long, no punk ass Tojo is going to accept him as leader. So....in order to gain respect....Saejima gets sent to prison. AGAIN.

 

Yeah, don't ask me, it's this stupid.

 

He needs to survive for only 2 years then he will return to his clan all lieutenant-y and shit. However, of course, he is constantly being set up and assaulted in the prison with no ways of retaliation because otherwise his plan of leaving prison goes to smoke. Saejima also manages to befriend other inmates, one of them being Baba, a kid who was imprisoned for accidentally killing someone.

 

Honestly, I like Saejima's part in this game. He's the typical "I am stupid as a sack of potatoes but dear GOD am I gonna spread honor, beatdowns and BALLS OUT lines". He learns that it's more important to form connections with people close to him instead of some washed out clan full of clowns.

Saejima also has one unique minigame, hunting in the mountains (once he escapes the prison...again). It's pretty basic, you go and shoot animals, but it's the best way of making money early in the game. 

After all his deer hunting, Saejima also reaches the snowy city of Tsukimino. It's a pretty bland level but the snowy section is fun enough. Also you can dress Saejima as Santa.

 

But in true Saejima fashion, he is too slow to catch on to all the events, so the mysterious detective from Part 1 shows up and sends his ass to Kamurocho as well. We gonna get the protagonists in one place!

 

Part 3 - Haruka Sawamura/Akiyama Shun - Dancing night in Sotenbori

 

This chapter is split into 2 sub-parts and it's by far my favorite section of the game. You play as Haruka while she is trying to become the No.1 Idol in Sotenbori. Unlike her uncle Kaz, you do not fight goons as Haruka. All her aim is to improve her singing, dancing and fame via various actions. You can engage into street dance battles ,you can perform in front of audiences, you can join shows or quizzes in quite the unique way.

 

Honestly it was a breath of fresh air playing as Haruka, since you didn't have to worry about being assaulted at every step by angry goons. Sotenbori is as beautiful as ever and the songs that you have to perform are catchy enough so you won't get bored easily. Also there are a lot of great moments between Haruka and her manager Miss Park, a korean woman determined to make Haruka shine by any means necessary. 

 

Meanwhile Akiyama is trying to open a new branch of his money lending business Sky Finance so he relocates in Sotenbori. Certain events involving a Yakuza message gets both Haruka and Akiyama together as they try to untangle murders, hidden relationships and what's the involvment of the leader of Ousaka Enterprises (the ones that deal with Haruka's rival idol group, T-Set) .

Another interesting character is this leader, Katsuya Naoki, who is revealed to be another Omi captain. Just like Watase, this man also commands respect, except he is a calculated man of few words who prefers to solve stuff via diplomacy instead of violence, a rare trait among Yakuza.

 

Of course, Akiyama is also convinced by the ever annoying detective to move his butt to Kamurocho. Haruka has to perform a concert in Kamurocho so she has to get there by default.

 

I really am struggling to spoil as little as possible  

 

Part 4 - Tatsuo Shinada - Balls out baseball man!

 

In this part we meet the newest character to join the fray, Shinada, a former pro baseball player/batter who was accused of stealing signs 15 years ago(what the hell is even that, probably the gang signs the catcher does behind his back) and is currently trying to live off as a writer for an Adult magazine, since he is not allowed to play baseball anymore. Shinada is a complete bum, hounded by loan sharks and angry neighbors, always with no money in his pocket.

 

So, while Mr Shinada was barely living, a mysterious man comes with a suitcase full of money and I mean STACKS of money and offers him a job - find out who set up Shinada 15 years ago. Shinada doesn't want to in the beginning (for...some reason?????) but he eventually accepts, since the alternative was losing his fingers to a loan shark. Thus begins a collection of stupid adventures, deaths, mayhem and lots of baseball together with our goofy man Shinader.

 

At first I did not like Shinada, he is a complete dumbass and his fighting style sucks big time (he specializes in grapples and weapons, which are largely useless until you level Shinada up a significant amount) . But in time, I started to enjoy Shinada's antics and all the goofiness that was happening in Kineicho, the city that is almost on par with Kamurocho in terms of enjoyment. This is probably the only moment in the game where I got a "Yakuza 0" vibe, with all the minigames, cochin races, silly sidequests and lottery.

 

And Baseball. Holy fuck there's a lot of baseball. But there's a twist.

 

Shinada, being a pro player, doesn't have the same issues as the rest of the cast with that atrocious ass minigame. No, Shinada has an entire stat screen related to baseball (which is also his side story), the more baseball related quests he accomplishes the more his stats increase. His batting range is insane, he can slow down time and he can hit instant home runs if you hit the ball at the right time. I almost enjoyed his minigame.

 

But of course, after all the shenanigans, he finds out that *gasp* the one that set him up was...uh...I forgot. Some dude in baseball. And now his old baseball friend is going to take over...something. And so Shinada stops him and comes to the conclusion that he has to go to Kamurocho.

How is that related to the main plot?????

 

Shinada brings NO contribution to the main story. Seriously, if you erase him completely the story and the outcome would not change at all. He was just an addition to replace Tanimura from Yakuza 4 after his actor got caught in some scandal (drugs are bad m'kay?). As much as I enjoyed baseball man's antics, his importance in the main plot is non-existent.

This is where I got completely bamboozled and had no idea where the story is going.

And oh boy it got worse. Much worse.

 

THE FINALE - Lawd, have mercy

 

So AT SOME POINT the characters realized something - the mastermind who is making a mess in all these cities, inciting war between Tojo and Omi is planning to - be ready for this - kill Haruka during her debut concert...to kill the dreams of Kiryu and all others around.

 

Meanwhile the leader of the Ousaka Enterprise who is also an Omi leader, Katsuya, holds a press conference and shows that he arrived in Kamurocho Hills (where you played Majima Constructions in Kiwami 2). Kiryu takes this as an invitation and storms Kamurocho Hills, beating all of Katsuya's goons. He arrives there with Saejima and finds there not only Katsuya, but also Watase the other Omi captain. Katsuya says that there's a hidden mastermind who is plotting all this dumb shit...and the only way to lure him out....

....is to do a 4 man deathmatch.....

....on top of the building....

....and the winner will take the mastermind out....

 

So they fight, obviously! Winner is Kiryu (obviously part 2), but it's not like the mastermind would just come out of the blue just because 4 idiots are fighting.

HELL FUCKING NO, HE DOES COME OUT, GLOATING, WITH A GUN. Shooting everyone in the leg/torso, while gloating some more!

 

And then Daigo comes out behind him, gun out, shoots the mastermind's gun, delivers a speech and ends up being himself gunned down by some hidden henchman!

 

This is when I was "nope, Yakuza 5 is garbage". All the buildup, all the drama went to the gutter when I saw this Bugs Bunny level of plan. I swear everyone had an aneurysm at the same time because absolutely NOTHING made sense in this game. I left details out, such as who is the villain, but that's pretty much it.

 

It's not even close to the disappointment that I faced next - the FINAL BOSS.

The mastermind did all this for his son. The one you have to face. This son of his...is one of the henchmen from chapter 1, that you met exactly 3 times in the entire story. Some nnbody who has 8 health bars and gets cooked from tiger drops in a matter of minutes.

 

Bruh this sucked major donkey balls. This is the most unremarkable final boss in the entire franchise. NOBODY was as unimportant as this jobber whose sole trait is that he has a square head. His big dream was to defeat Kiryu....just to end up being beaten by a wounded Kiryu who was bleeding like he was Fontana Di Trevi in Italy. Dude this sucked ass, WHO WROTE THIS SHIT?

How can the people who wrote the compelling stuff from 1 and 2, the manly tears from 3 and the rubber bullets shenanigans from 4 , also have this third rate story? Jesus Christ!

Honestly, if they spared Kiryu from this shame and did not include him in the game, maybe the game would have been better. Yeah, Shinada has his moment, Saejima fights like the bonehead that he is and Akiyama is finally hailed as the hero of Kamurocho, but what's even the point when we end up with this poop of a final boss?

 

So I decided. Final boss was Amon. Fuck it, that was a fantastic fight.

 

 

END OF SPOILERS

 

 

 

 

 

 

So...that's pretty much Yakuza 5. Your average Yakuza, bogged down by tons of activities (the platinum is an utter chore), a fuckton of encounters (you really have goons assaulting you every 2 seconds), some painful dating minigames and the most stupid story in the franchise.

Can't say it's a bad game, if you want to blitz through it, but man does it have a crapton of flaws. 

But well, you reached this point, might as well play this one too, no?  

Imma play Yakuza 6 directly after this, let's see how the story ends.

 

THE GOOD:

• 5 cities, 5 times the fun
• Haruka activities are enjoyable
• Akiyama is the best Yakuza protagonist confirmed
• Characters' side quests are fun

THE BAD:

• Holy shit there's so many goon encounters in the city. Without Beads of Good Fortune you are pretty much fucked
• The story is what my cat buries in the sand in the backyard
• Shinada is the most awesome irrelevant character in the series
• The Tojo should be annihilated at this point, they're stupid to a fault
• The entire game feels like a chore.

RECOMMENDATION - Yakuza 4  Ignore the naysayers, THIS GAME IS FUCKING FANTASTIC! It's got the same retarded plot but there's that kind of consistency that you will absolutely love, you'll constantly have the "dear god what asspull are they gonna do next" without getting too cringe about it. 

 

Also a small rating update, of my Yakuza games from most favorite to least favorite:

 

Yakuza 0 > Yakuza 4 > Kiwami 2 > Yakuza 3 > FotNS Lost Paradise > Kiwami 1 > Dead Souls > Yakuza 5.

 

Yeah that sounds about right. I really loved Yakuza 4, sorry Kiwami 2 you are getting dethroned here.

 

 

 

 

Edited December 24, 2023 by Copanele

[Platinum_Vice]

5 hours ago, Copanele said:

Yakuza 5 turned out to be a huge disappointment for me.

 

5 hours ago, Copanele said:

How is that related to the main plot?????

 

From my point of view, all of your pain was worth it, because it resulted in myself being able to read this fantastic review. ?

 

[Copanele]

5 hours ago, Platinum_Vice said:

 

 

From my point of view, all of your pain was worth it, because it resulted in myself being able to read this fantastic review. 

 

Hah, at least i don't feel like i wasted an entire day collecting BALLS in Pachinko anymore ?. 

 

I went straight into Yakuza 6, hearing that it's not that great. 1 kicked goon and 1 happy toddler later....yeah I think I will love this game. 

I simply can't get along with the Yakuza (games) community ??

[Puppeter04]

Sir, you started Y6 about two days ago and you're half way there, are you in a rush? I'm excited cuz that means another Yakuza review and I LOVE reading them and also excited to see how the ranking ends up after you're done! Good luck.

 

After finishing this and Y: Like a Dragon (I hope), I can literally see your face if SEGA dares to release a Y7 or something:

 

 

Any other big/long/HUGE sagas in mind? I'd only be surprised if you do them back to back tho ? that's when you'll earn my respect

 

[Copanele]

1 hour ago, Puppeter04 said:

Sir, you started Y6 about two days ago and you're half way there, are you in a rush? I'm excited cuz that means another Yakuza review and I LOVE reading them and also excited to see how the ranking ends up after you're done! Good luck.

 

Oh yeah, Yakuza 6....I was planning to take my time with it but I didn't take into consideration that the story is so damn good, I ended up blitzing through half of the story just because I wanted to know what's happening  

I did ignore quite a few sidequests/activities, I should get back to them...just after I see one more plot twist  

As for ranking...so far it's definitely higher than Yakuza 5 ?

1 hour ago, Puppeter04 said:

After finishing this and Y: Like a Dragon (I hope), I can literally see your face if SEGA dares to release a Y7 or something:

 

 

Oh No is already underway...here's the rest of the games that I have to play from this series/made by this company:

Yakuza LAD (Yakuza 7)

Judgment

Lost Judgment

Like a Dragon Ishin

Like a Dragon Gaiden (not released yet, it's your Yakuza 6.5 actually ?)

Yakuza 8 (not released yet, the continuation of Yakuza LAD)

 

 

So I can say that...I barely did more than half of the games   

1 hour ago, Puppeter04 said:

 

Any other big/long/HUGE sagas in mind? I'd only be surprised if you do them back to back tho  that's when you'll earn my respect

 

Sadly no huge sagas in mind, no respect earned  

What I plan are the following (more or less)

 

PS5 -> Grab Demon Souls Remake -> Grab DMC5 -> Grab Horizon Forbidden West -> Grab Diablo 2

 

Diablo 2 in itself would be the equivalent of an Uncharted series in terms of time investment  

[Puppeter04]

5 minutes ago, Copanele said:

 

Oh yeah, Yakuza 6....I was planning to take my time with it but I didn't take into consideration that the story is so damn good, I ended up blitzing through half of the story just because I wanted to know what's happening  

I did ignore quite a few sidequests/activities, I should get back to them...just after I see one more plot twist  

As for ranking...so far it's definitely higher than Yakuza 5 

 

Oh No is already underway...here's the rest of the games that I have to play from this series/made by this company:

Yakuza LAD (Yakuza 7)

Judgment

Lost Judgment

Like a Dragon Ishin

Like a Dragon Gaiden (not released yet, it's your Yakuza 6.5 actually )

Yakuza 8 (not released yet, the continuation of Yakuza LAD)

 

 

 

 

PS5 -> Grab Demon Souls Remake -> Grab DMC5 -> Grab Horizon Forbidden West -> Grab Diablo 2

 

Diablo 2 in itself would be the equivalent of an Uncharted series in terms of time investment  

I said 7 cause I'm not counting spin-offs with numbers but damn I completely forgot about Judgment and the other 2 LADs, and I even wrote an article about Pierre Taki's arrest when Judgment was taken out of the Japanese market ? too many games in my head... Tho I'm glad this is not the account I used as part of my job back then otherwise I wouldn't even wanna look at the backlog, it'd be freaking huge. 

 

 

 

Sounds like a plan, a good one tho! you're gonna play Diablo lV after that? cause it's just around the corner 

[Copanele]

1 hour ago, Puppeter04 said:

 

Sounds like a plan, a good one tho! you're gonna play Diablo lV after that? cause it's just around the corner 

I...do not know. If it's anything like Diablo 3 then hell no. Diablo 3 was a massive disappointment for me ? it completely failed to see the reason why Diablo 2 was so beloved.

I might go for Path of Exile instead...that one looks very good.

[Grotz99]

On 3/22/2023 at 0:43 PM, Copanele said:

WARNING - the following post will have quite a number of possible spoilers about Yakuza 5. I can't really talk about this game without giving away some plot points so...read at your own risk  

 

 No. 223 - Yakuza 5

 

 

Platinum Name - The Dream, Fulfilled 

 

Possible yakuza 5 spoiler but prob not.

Spoiler

Just beat this game and was like ok the dude you referenced in the picture was around for a while and this ending is actually pretty awesome....until I got to the end and was like wtf is this jabroni?

 

Edited March 26, 2023 by Grotz99

[Copanele]

5 hours ago, Grotz99 said:

 

Possible yakuza 5 spoiler but prob not.

  Reveal hidden contents

Just beat this game and was like ok the dude you referenced in the picture was around for a while and this ending is actually pretty awesome....until I got to the end and was like wtf is this jabroni?

 

Hah precisely that. There's even that dialogue:

Kiryu: "What are you doing here?"

Random whatever:"To be honest I am not really sure myself"

 

That exchange mirrored my feels about the game. Truly peak writing. 

But on the other hand, I had maxed out tiger drop so I just R1+triangle the entire rest of the game ? I had more challenge from Air Hockey than from the boss(es)

 

[Copanele]

 No. 224 - Yakuza 6: The Song of Life

 

Platinum Name: The Song of Life 

Hardest Trophy: Story of my Life complete all substories

Difficulty: 3/10

 

There's a very few series that truly wrap up a saga well. Off the top of my head, I'd say the Prince of Persia trilogy did a good job with it, followed by Dark Souls and heck, even Devil May Cry did a great job in concluding Dante's saga. That doesn't mean that the series is done for, just that the main protagonist's story has reached its conclusion.

 

I am happy to say that Yakuza 6 does that very well. It's the final main game with Kazuma Kiryu as the main protagonist (disregarding the upcoming Yakuza Gaiden) and this is where all your adventures with the Dragon of Dojima end. RGG studios did a great job of writing this game, especially considering the massive WTF that Yakuza 5 was.

I'd say Yakuza 6 was a turning point for the studio as well, since it's the first game where RGG implemented the Dragon Engine, which aimed for a complete improvement of the gameplay and graphics. While the combat is not nearly as good as the older games (Y6 can be also considered "experimental"), the graphics got an incredible jump in quality, loading screens being removed completely. The stores are an integral part of the world now, you can enter in them normally or even throw goons into them when you fight.

 

Welcome to the upgraded Kamurocho

 

In many ways, this feels like how Yakuza 3 felt compared to Yakuza 2 (the original, not Kiwami 2). It is a complete joy to simply walk and explore every alleyway in both Kamurocho and Onomichi, the newly added town situated in Hiroshima. Onomichi is a port town with the same vibe as Ryukyu from Yakuza 3 and it really gets the vibe right, especially during nighttime when all the streets are deserted. That's when the town feels the most dangerous, proof that the Dragon Engine got the mood setting right.

 

The change of gameplay however...yeah they tried  Kiryu doesn't have the textbook combos anymore, his Dragon style feels very toned down and the impact is not there anymore (especially when you unlock the famous Tiger Drop). There's 2 improvements however: the grab, where Kiryu spins around with an enemy, hitting everyone near him and inflicting quite a great amount of damage, and the ragdoll effect, which I can never get sick of. Basically if you hit an enemy with enough force, you will send him flying, and if that enemy hits more enemies you can get a "pool" effect. Sending enemies flying never got boring, which is why I enjoyed the encounters in this game greatly  

You can also run from encounters in this game, a feat that would have been welcomed in Yakuza 5.

Where the game suffers most however is when you have to fight bosses, an issue that I also had with Kiwami 2. No matter how imposing a boss is, when you see him flying in the air like a piece of rag...it kinda cuts the impact of the moment ? One exception being a specific let's say...Korean Vergil  that I absolutely LOVED to throw around after him talking mad shit to me like he was some gangsta korean dude.

 

As for the story...it's a direct continuation of Yakuza 5 and we have to thank Haruka for that. I won't spoil ANYTHING about Yakuza 6 here, I just have to say several things:

• Kiryu could give Kratos some lessons in terms of how to act as a parent
• There are a ton of parallels between Yakuza 3 and Yakuza 6, Yakuza 6 feels like a "we finally did what we wanted to do in 3"
• The actual main plot point which will be ignored by many, will ONLY make sense if you know the situation of post-WW2 Japan (I had to document myself after finishing the game, cause I too thought the main plot was meh). 

 

As for the characters....once again, I think Yakuza 6 redeemed the series in my eyes after the horrible writing that was in 5. Kiryu is at its most vulnerable here, because for once the villains actually aim to hurt the ones close to him, not the usual "Let's try to kill the man who can deflect rocket launchers and teleport while fighting 100000 goons". One "small" spoiler, this time there's no Tojo trying some half-assed scheme anymore, thank GOD because I was tired of the incompetency of that stupid ass clan.

This time you only get to play as Kiryu, with Akiyama in a supporting role. There's a new gang of "friendly neighborhood Yakuza" in Onomichi, main star of the show being Nagumo, a hot headed captain of the local Yakuza who obviously headbutts with Kiryu. He really reminds me of Rikiya, but he's way less charismatic I'd say (while being more efficient however). Him and his crew of idiots really cracked me out, because somehow they had the feeling of " actual family". 

 

I also enjoyed Kiryu slowly getting more accustomed to the quirks and habits of Onomichi. It really felt like he was slowly starting to belong there, compared to Nagasugai in 5 where I felt that Kiryu was an intruder no matter how many loved him there.  There's even one minigame where Kiryu has to sit at a bar and talk with the regulars there, interact and listen to their daily troubles.

Onomichi really feels like an actual community here.

 

As a true 48 years old, Kiryu unlocked the "dad selfie" skill

 

As for the platinum...easiest Yakuza game to plat by far. You barely have to complete the minigames and the only thing you have to work for is a stupid grind in Clan Creator, a strategy minigame which I won't get into detail because it's some mindless "send overpowered heroes to defeat minions" minigame. For a Yakuza game, it's like a breath of fresh air compared to the madness in Yakuza 5.

 

Overall, I would say that in terms of quality, Yakuza 6 is pretty high up there. It has some twists and turns, a well said story (not as zany as Yakuza 4 but it's still good), the villains are ACTUALLY dangerous and know what they are doing (unlike a certain blockhead from 5) and it gives you a bittersweet taste. Maybe you won't get to play as the Dragon of Dojima anymore, but who knows...maybe his story ain't over yet  

 

Also together with this game, I would also like to take a break from the series. I still have to play Judgment, Lost Judgment, Ishin and ...ugh...LAD (i hate Turn Based Bullshit in my Action game), but I need a well deserved break before I get a massive case of burnout. 

Judgment might be the next game I tackle, but I am in no rush to do so!

 

THE GOOD:

• Dragon Engine graphics are phenomenal
• Kiryu feels like an actual human being again
• Onomichi is a fantastic town
• A great ending of a saga
• Korean Vergil

THE BAD:

• Gameplay took a hit, instead of delivering one
• The main mystery won't have much impact if you don't know several Japanese history points
• Haruka acts abit uncharacteristic (although it wouldn't have surprised me if she was a real person)

Recommendation - God of War The Norse Saga  the other blockhead who sort of kind of learns how to be a dad (not as effective as Kiryu). Got a great story AND great combat to boot  

 

 

RANKING TIME!

 

Let's see where I'd put Yakuza 6...took me a while to think of, but:

 

Yakuza 0 > Yakuza 4 > Yakuza 6> Kiwami 2 > Yakuza 3 > FotNS Lost Paradise > Kiwami 1 > Dead Souls > Yakuza 5.

 

I know I know, Kiwami 2 took another hit, but I think that Yakuza 6's story is way better. Ryuji Goda IS the best villain in the series...but I tiger dropped him once and he flew around like a ragdoll and made me crack up and lose any tension. 

I think Kiwami 2 is brought down by the Dragon Engine honestly. Also the Jingweon were chumps.

 

ANYWAY I think Yakuza 6 is high up there because of the story and Onomichi. Might change my mind later, but for now I'd say this is my ranking in terms of preferences

Y0 is still king.

 

 

Edited December 24, 2023 by Copanele

[Copanele]

Skullgirls 2nd Encore - Black Dahlia DLC

 

From time to time Skullgirls 2nd Encore gets another character as DLC, which forces me to redownload the game. I don't really mind though, since Skullgirls is a fun fighting game  

This time the newly added character is Black Dahlia, the local mafia's top assassin. She's an unhinged killer whose sole purpose is to have the best fight of her life.

Gameplay wise, she is a setup/trap based character, using her grenade launcher with various elemental properties to set up various types of attacks. She's abit too complex for my tastes but regardless her design is quite interesting.

 

The DLC brings 2 new trophies:

• Off the leash is the typical story mode, where Black Dahlia faces various characters from the game. You can also see how unhinged (and professional) she is when it comes to her job. The story is so-so, but I like how the devs are slowly setting up a major story in the background. Makes me wonder if they will do a Skullgirls 3rd Encore or something.
• Destructive Decadence is another obscure trophy that you "think" you know how to unlock. In reality, just like most of the Skullgirls 2nd Encore trophy, you get vague clues from the trophy description, all you need to do is to figure out what's the actual requirement. This trophy tells you "A good hitwoman is familiar with her entire arsenal.". The trophy icon shows her various grenades, so it's reasonable to think that you have to pull a combo which contains all the 6 different type of grenades. 
• truth be told, the trophy popped even if I dropped the combo. I figured out a simple 6 grenades combo and repeated that until...it triggered. Maybe the requirement was to use each grenade x numbers of times, who knows! Skullgirls trophies are obscure like that!

Anyway, the game is back at 100%. One more character to be revealed, wonder who that is!

 

[Copanele]

Well, I've decided to finally get with the times...

 

Platinum Machine 3 Acquired - PS5

 

This purchase was done thanks to the fact that both of my PS4 controllers started to stick drift at the same time. I decided that enough is enough and did the full upgrade in the end, instead of buying another set of shitty DS4 plastic generators.

Finding a PS5 is finally easy. It's not as easy to find a GAME-FREE PS5 however, since most if not all stores give you the PS5 + a game, the package being way more expensive than buying the PS5 and the game separately. It's especially hard to find a version without the garbage that is FIFA 2023 - this is the most played game in RO on the console and the same game gives me nausea and brings eternal shame upon my family.

 

After swimming through the sewage that is Romanian online shopping, I finally found a game-free PS5 with a reasonable price. Ordered it, received it in 3 days...just to find out that they delivered me the FIFA 2023 edition...which made me pop the "Badge of Shame" trophy irl ?

 

I was this close to returning it - I shall live with the shame

 

After spending a grand total of ...2 minutes to find a buyer for the game + voucher (don't ask me why people here love this game), I connected the beast. Checked the manuals in full Polish (no English version even - who packed this thing?), set the stand for the console and, there we go, another addition to the Copanele Entertainment Family!

The PS4 can get a well deserved rest now! NOT the PS3, that one has to work a bit more unfortunately  

 

First game started - DMC5. We have to begin with something relaxing after all ?